Camp Revenge
by starsnuffers
Summary: Shane and Mitchie started off hating eachother. But when Shane wants revenge on Tess, Mitchie is there to help. Follow them through their relationship - up and down, zigged and zagged with love and hate, Camp Rock plot is less G-Rated... Now in season 2.
1. Coming to Camp

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**A\N: I decided to make my own version of Camp Rock, because I was a little disappointed by the way it turned out. I liked it and all, but it needed to be a little less G-Rated… So here is MY tweaked version of the movie, "Camp Rock"! It includes way more Jonas and a little less of Demi and the girls…**

**Camp Rock **

**Chapter 1**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

Nate came over to me. "Shane, we need to talk,"

"I'm too busy to talk!" I barked, walking over to my guitars. "Nate, we need to practice for our tour."

"Yeah, about that…" Nate mumbled.

I whipped around. "What about the tour?"

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, Jason and I kinda are canceling the tour…"

"WHAT?!" I yelled.

Nate flinched before continuing. "The way you stormed off the set of our new music video cost the record label thousands of dollars and may have cost us our record deal."

I rolled my eyes. "Come on, Nate. That's bull shit."

"Shane, you need to clean up your act. You've been acting like a real asshole to everyone and Jason and I aren't too happy about it. You're ruining the band, man! What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong with me," I scoffed and walked away.

"Well thanks to you, everything is ruined," Nate growled.

I turned around and put my hands on my hips. "Excuse me?"

He shied away. "Uhh… nothing. I gotta go," Nate said and ran the other way.

I cursed under my breath and then walked over to Jason. He was eating a muffin of some sort. I grabbed it from him and threw it on the floor. "Stop eating and start explaining!"

Jason looked hurt. He picked the muffin up off of the ground and brushed some of the dirt off. He bit off another part of it. "Explaining what?"

I put my hands on my hips. "Explain why you canceled the tour,"

He shrugged. "It was all Nate's idea…" he mumbled and walked away.

I huffed and then walked over to Nate, who was putting away some guitars. "You! This was all your idea!"

Nate looked at me. "Sorry, Shane, but you asked for it."

X X X

Jason and Nate came up to me. "Hey, we're going for an interview," Nate told me.

"An interview?" I asked. Since when do we have interviews?

Nate nodded. "Yeah. On some radio station. Now hop in the limo," he said.

I followed my band members over to our black limo. I got inside and turned on the TV. "So…" I started. "Where is this place?"

Jason and Nate looked at each other and turned the TV off.

"Well, we're not actually going to an interview," Jason said.

Nate elbowed him.

"Ow! What'd you do that for you little-" Jason exclaimed.

Nate shot him a glance. He looked back at me. "We're taking you to Camp Rock."

I laughed. Camp Rock, eh? I haven't been there in forever. Yeah, right. Jason and Nate looked at each other. "You guys are just kidding, right?" I asked.

Jason searched his tiny, tiny brain and then shook his head. "Uhh… no."

"We actually are taking you back to Camp Rock," Nate said.

My jaw dropped. "What? I don't want to waste my summer at some camp! I'm Shane freaking Gray for God's sake!"

Nate rolled his eyes. "Hey man, we used to love this place. Three years ago, we were campers."

Jason nodded. "Yeah man, this is where Connect Three… connected," he looked thoughtfully up at the sky.

Nate gave him a weird look. "And you get to see your Uncle Brown."

I rolled my eyes and scoffed. "Not a selling point."

"Look man," Nate continued. "Right now, you're the bad boy of the press, and the label has a problem with that… which means, we have a problem with that."

Jason cut him off. "Actually, I don't really have a problem with that." Nate shot him a glance and he stuttered a bit. He pointed to me. "_We_ have a problem with that.

"This camp thing is supposed to fix it; it's good PR. So do your time…" Nate smiled. "Enjoy the fresh air… get a tan."

"Oh!" Jason exclaimed. "And can you make me a birdhouse or something?"

Nate sighed and closed his eyes, hitting his head on the back of the seat.

I gave Jason a weird look and shook my head. "One word: Payback!"

Jason shook his head and held out two fingers. "That's two words!"

I rolled my eyes, unbuckling my seat belt and getting out the car, my guitar in hand. I slammed the door and Nate came over to the window.

"By the way!" he called out. "We told the press that you'd be doing a duet with the winner of the Final Jam!"

I stuck my head in the window. "What?! You little bastard!"

Nate waved goodbye with a slight smirk on his face, and then closed the window, zooming away. I was left standing there with my black and white checkered gig bag, feeling totally betrayed by my band members. I scoffed, rolled my eyes, and then went over to my uncle's cabin.

My uncle opened the door with his arms out, ready for a hug. "Shane!" I walked past him, entering the cabin.

"Hey Uncle Brown," I muttered, inviting myself into his cabin.


	2. Meeting Mitchie

**Chapter 2**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

I went around camp for a while, getting a couple of looks from some girls. They started chasing me, but I lost them. I went for a mini-hike (if you call walking up a hill a hike) and then three hours later, I couldn't take it anymore and I called Nate.

I walked while I talked on the phone with my band members. "Come on guys," I begged. "I learned my lesson. I showered in cold water, I have looked at a tree… it's been three hours, and I need hair products!"

_"I guess it's time to embrace the natural look,"_ Nate said.

_"Well have fun," _Jason laughed.

I scoffed. "Guys!" I looked at my phone and saw that they had hung up. I rolled my eyes and walked a little bit more, putting my cell phone back in my pocket.

Much to my horror, a bunch of girls started to scream. "Ahh! There he is!" one of them yelled.

I looked back and saw a mob of girls chasing after me. I panicked and then ran. I turned the corner of one of the cabins, and then tripped over a branch. I fell to the ground and scraped my knee on a rock. "Mother fucker!" I screamed and grabbed my knee. I cried out in pain. Everything was hurting, especially my wrist. I looked at it and saw that it was swelling up. Great. I tried to stay as quiet as I could while the mob rushed past me.

"Where'd he go?" one of the girls asked, looking around.

I started breathing heavily, and then heard someone… singing.

_"Do you know what it's like, to feel so in the dark? To dream about a life where you're the shining star? Even though it seems, like it's too far away, I have to believe in myself, it's the only way,"_ the voice sang. It sounded awful.

I pushed myself up from the dirt, wiping off my pants. I went into the cabin it was coming from and saw a girl sitting at the piano. She had long dark-brown hair with side-swept bangs. She had a red top on with blue jeans. The girl was wearing some disgusting brown boots. "What the hell is with all this racket?!" I screamed at the girl.

She looked up at me and looked like she was about to cry. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. She ran away. I raced after her. "Who are you?" I asked her.

The girl looked up at me. "Um… I'm… uh…"

I rolled my eyes. "Come on. What's your name?"

"Mitchie… my name's Mitchie," she held out a hand for me to shake it, but I just stared at it.

"What kind of a name is Mitchie?" I sneered.

Mitchie gave me a hurt look. "Umm… thanks? I gotta go," she turned to walk away, but I stopped her.

"Mitch, wait," I put one of my hands on her shoulder.

She turned around. "What?"

I gave her a hard glare. "Mitch… You suck. Offense intended."

Mitchie looked hurt.

"Do the world a favor and don't sing, how 'bout that?" I sneered. I know what you're thinking: Oh my God! That was really mean! Well guess what, I'm a mean person so it all works out.

She scoffed. "You're not a very nice person,"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, and who are you to be telling me that? Look, I have more important things to do than to save the world one horrible singer at a time; I probably just broke my wrist, running from a mob of screaming girls, and I'm going to make sure my band knows that they hurt me," I stormed off and used my good hand to dial Nate's number. He picked up on the second ring. "Nate, you little son of a bitch! The second I get my hands on you, I'm going to kick your ass!"

Nate was taken aback. _"What'd I do – or didn't do – this time?"_

I talked as I walked over to the nurse's cabin. "Thanks to you, I tripped and hurt my wrist," I yelled.

_"I didn't push you,"_ Nate scoffed.

"Yeah, but you sent me to this camp, causing me to get attacked by girls, causing me to run away, causing me to fall, causing me to hurt my wrist… got it?"

_"Sure you hurt your wrist,"_ I heard Jason say.

"Oh shut up, Jason! If you guys were here, you'd see that I was in some serious pain. I hope you're happy!" I yelled to the phone. I walked into the cabin. "Look, I gotta go and get my wrist fixed. If I die, stay away from my funeral," I hung up the phone and shoved it into the pocket of my skinny jeans.

The nurse came over to me. "Yes Shane?"

I held out my wrist. "And it's all Nate's fault…" I muttered.

"He pushed you?" she asked.

I rolled my eyes. "He might have well had… If I die, you make sure they feel awful about the whole thing."

She looked at my wrist. "You're not going to die," she reassured, and took out an icepack, shoving it at me. "Put this on your wrist and get over your little boo-boo."

I narrowed my eyes and took the icepack from her, setting it gently on my wrist, slightly wincing at the pain. The nurse wrapped my wrist up and then I left her cabin. God damn it, how am I going to play guitar with my wrist in such a critical condition? I went back to Uncle Brown's cabin and stormed in. "Uncle Brown, we have a problem!"

Uncle Brown looked up from the computer. "What?" he asked.

I plopped myself down on his bed and held out my wrist. "Look at this, Uncle Brownie, look!"

My uncle hates his little nickname. He glared at me and then looked at my wrist. "Looks like you hurt your wrist…"

"No shit, Sherlock!" I scoffed. "And it's all thanks to your stupid camp!"

He put his hands on his hips. "You need to stop being so rude. Need I remind you that you used to love this camp?"

"Well this camp sure doesn't love me! Look at what it did to me!" I pointed to the hole in my brand-new skinny jeans.

When I felt like Brownie couldn't care less, I rolled my eyes and went back to my private cabin, falling asleep even though it was only seven.


	3. Camp Sucks

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 3**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I woke up the next morning and it was way too early to be waking up. Uncle Brown was pushing me. "Piss off, Brownie!" I mumbled through my pillow.

He pulled the blanket off of me. "Rise and shine, superstar!"

I scoffed and put my pillow over my head.

My uncle rolled his eyes. "Don't make me do this, Shane,"

"Go away!" I mumbled.

The next thing I know, there's cold water being splashed on me. I gasped and looked up at my uncle, my hair dripping wet. "What the hell!?" I yelled. He had taken the flower vase off of my side table and poured the disgusting plant water on me.

He rolled his eyes. "Whoops. Sorry. Don't say I didn't warn you."

I looked down at my bed that was covered with water. "Fine. I'm up. Ok? I'm up."

My uncle pointed a finger at me. "We've both got classes to teach; yours starts in five. Now stop bitching and get dressed," He turned to walk out the door. "And you might want to put that mattress out in the sun," he smirked. "That's the only one you're gonna get."

I groaned and laid back down on the bed.

"Can you put some water in that vase?" my uncle continued. "The flowers look parched."

Oh, he's just loving this.

"Four minutes!" he called out from outside my cabin.

I rolled my eyes and hopped out of bed. I took the red sheets off of my bed and brought my mattress outside to dry, just like Uncle Brown had advised. I looked at the vase on the counter and opened the window. I chucked the vase out the window and then I heard a scream from some girl. "My bad!" I called out after her, closing the window quickly.

Apparently that girl can't forgive and forget, because she stormed into my cabin. It was that Mitchie girl. "What the fuck!?" she screamed.

I shrugged. "Sorry," I muttered, not convincing at all, and took off my wet shirt, replacing it with a new one.

The angry girl approached me, pointing an accusing finger. "You could have killed me!"

I shrugged. Maybe that wouldn't have been such a bad thing. "Do you mind? I'm trying to get ready here," I hissed and started taking off my pants.

Mitchie rolled her eyes and walked out of my cabin.

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out!" I called out after the girl. I finished getting ready and looked at the clock. It had been ten minuets since my class started and I still haven't eaten breakfast or anything.

My stomach screamed for food after missing dinner, so I headed off to the dining hall instead of my class. I went into the kitchen and saw all the workers, running around. They seemed to ignore me. "Hello?! Hungry superstar over here!" I called out.

The chef came over to me. "Yes Shane?"

I put my hands on my hips. "In case you were wondering, I'm hungry, thanks for asking."

She went over to a tray and handed me an apple. I scrunched up my face in disgust. "Gross. Healthy food sucks."

The chef rolled her eyes and grabbed a bag of Doritos. "That's more like it," I said and walked out of the kitchen.

I walked over to my class, but I was still hungry, so I went back to the kitchen. No one seemed to be in here. "Hello?" I asked. "Hello?"

I heard someone rummage through some pots and pans. "Hello?" I asked again. "I can hear you," I rolled my eyes. I looked around a bit, not seeing anyone. My eyes widened when I caught a glimpse of some girl, her face covered in flour, coming out from behind a cart.

"Hi," she smiled and stood up.

I approached the girl. "Do you work here?"

"Uh," she stuttered. "Uh, y-yes."

My jaw dropped. "Wow," I said. "You really get into your work…" She gave me a weird look. "I'm Shane," I said, grabbing a cupcake with blue frosting, "but I'm sure even the kitchen help knows that.

"Of course!" the girl said. "It's nice to meet you!"

I took some frosting off of the blue cupcake and licked my fingers. "Actually it's not so nice," I said. "See my manager said that he sent over my food allergy list, but since I couldn't even go near my breakfast this morning… Can I just talk to whoever's in charge?"

The girl scoffed. "Excuse me?"

I shrugged. "What?" I snapped.

"Well you're kind of being an ass."

"And you are?"

"A person!" she exclaimed. "And there's a way to talk to a person, and that's not it!"

I stared at the girl for a moment. "I'll have my manager send it over now,"

She nodded. "Fine," I turned to leave, but she coughed, signaling me to turn back around. What does this girl want from me?

I rolled my eyes. "Thank you?" I asked, not sure as to what to do.

The girl smiled and nodded. "Much better."

I gave her a weird look and then left the kitchen. Freaky girl likes to play with baking supplies… Although she did seem kind of familiar… Mitchie, maybe? Nah, who am I kidding!


	4. Meeting Tess

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 4**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

So maybe I totally ditched my class… so what? It was about over anyway… I bet the snot-nosed kids had a blast without a teacher for a day, just hanging out and talking. Maybe it was better if I didn't teach kids anyway. I got a call from Jason. "What?" I barked.

_"So have you started my birdhouse yet?"_ he asked.

I stopped walking. "What?"

_"Well you said that you'd make me a birdhouse,"_

"No I didn't!" I yelled.

Nate talked on the phone. _"So is your wrist ok? How's camp?"_

"Camp is a load of shit, you guys."

_"You didn't used to think that when we went there as campers,"_ Nate told me.

"Yeah, well things change. I met this girl… Her name's Mitchie. And she taught me one thing: All the people here suck compared to us. It's a good thing we left this hellhole and became famous, because if we had stayed at this camp, we would have gotten nowhere with these amateurs."

_"You're overreacting,"_

"I am not! Now excuse me as I kill myself in this lake," I hung up the phone and sat down on the dock. I stuck my feet in the cool water and watched the waved lap up on the shore. There were a couple people canoeing. It kind of reminded me of my camp days here.

Suddenly, I heard my uncle yelling. "Shane Gray!" his voice boomed through the peaceful morning.

I turned my head and looked at him. He was coming towards me, apparently very angry. Hr grabbed my ear and pulled me up. "Get up, you lazy bum!"

I tried to pull myself away from his grasp. He was hurting my ear. "Easy there, Brownie! Rock star in distress!" We walked back towards the camp.

"You need a chaperon to keep you under control," my uncle told me.

"I don't need a chaperon!" I argued.

We continued walking. "Seeing how you blew off your class today, you sort of do!"

"I didn't sign up for this!" I exclaimed. "Get my agent on the phone!"

My uncle stopped walking. "Get my agent on the phone?!" he repeated, mocking me. "What happened to you, man? That kid on that TV, that's not who you really are. What happened to the kid who just loved music?"

I leaned in close. "He grew up!"

"Big whoop! Stop acting like it's all about you!" he scolded me.

I let out a huff of laughter. "In my world, it is."

Uncle Brown put an arm around my shoulder, and created an imaginary rainbow with his hand. "Oh look, we're in my world. And in my world, you're considered an instructor at this camp, which means you've got to instruct! Starting with hip hop dance, act two!"

I folded my arms and rolled my eyes and walked into the dance class. "Grab a mic and a hat," I ordered the kids standing before me. "Follow me if you can," I demanded and walked over to the front of the classroom.

They were taking a long time to get their hats on. "Hurry! Let's go!" I went over to the stereo and put in a mix CD I made. "Hurry!" I called out after the kids, who were still running into place.

The music started to play and I started to dance, showing them the moves. I did the first set of moves and they fumbled along. "You all suck!" I called out after them, watching as they attempted to do the moved. I went over to that Mitchie girl. "Put your hands up higher! Keep your knees bent! Don't you dare look at me like that!" I scolded her.

I pointed to the other side of the room. "Across the floor," I barked. All the little kiddies ran to the other side of the room, and I stood in front of them. I smirked when I did some impossible move. A few of the kids could keep up, but not many of them. I walked down the isle of the kids and watched as they aimlessly bounced around. "Just stop, stop, stop!" I yelled at them.

All the kids stopped dancing. I turned off the music. "You all are awful… absolutely horrible! Now you guys better step it up a notch or I won't teach you," I scowled.

I turned on a different song, and showed them some moves. One kid fell over and everyone gasped. I whipped around and face him. "Amateurs," I said under my breath and turned to leave the cabin. Right before I could step out the door, some girl stopped me.

"Wait!" she called out. I turned around a saw a girl wearing dark blue sweat pants and a red tank top. She had really blonde hair.

I stalked over to her. "And you are?"

She folded her arms. "Tess Tyler,"

"As in TJ Tyler's daughter?" I asked, curiously.

Tess nodded. "Yup."

TJ Tyler is a legend. "Tell her I said she's awesome… but you need a little work. Maybe you should go on tour with her and learn a little something," I narrowed my eyes.

She scoffed. "Excuse me?"

"Oh yes, I do believe I just dissed you in front of your peers," I told her, my arms folded across my chest.

Tess came up to me and we had a staring contest. Then, she pushed me. I laughed. "You call that a push? You push like my grandma!" I pushed her, and she tumbled backwards, gasping.

"I can not believe you just pushed me!" she exclaimed.

I raised an eyebrow. "It was pretty amazing, wasn't it? I could do it again if you would like me to,"

She shook her head and then started crying. I rolled my eyes. "Cry baby!" I called out after her, as she ran out the door.

Great. She's probably going to cry to my uncle and I'll be in a whole mess of trouble. I rolled my eyes and then felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around only to see Mitchie. "Yes?" I asked.

"You pushed that bitch?" she asked.

I nodded. "You saw me, didn't you? Or are you blind?"

She held out her hand for a high five. "Way to go!"

I high fived her. I'm starting to like this Mitch Bitch after all.


	5. Canoeing

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 5**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I stepped out of the dance hall, a huge grin spread across my face. I totally just made someone cry! Doesn't that make everyone's day? I strutted down the dirt path of the camp, my head held high. I walked over to my cabin and went inside, only to see a note on my bed. I looked at the piece of paper. "Asshole!" it read. I smirked. I have such great fans. I threw the paper in the trash and went outside to see if my mattress and sheets were dry yet. I took them back inside and place them back on my bed frame.

I looked at my clock and noticed that it was almost time for lunch. I smiled at the thought of food (who doesn't like food?) and I set down the path to the dining hall. I caught a glimpse of my uncle. He looked really mad. I gasped and then ran the other way. I ran as far as I could, not wanting to get scolded by my uncle. But, he saw me anyway and he yelled after me. "Shane, you get back here right now!"

I closed my eyes. "Damn it!" I cursed under my breath and slowly turned around, walking back towards my uncle. He was standing next to Tess. "Yes?" I asked like nothing was wrong.

Tess's eyes were red and puffy, like she had been crying for a long time. Little evil, faking, whore. Gah, people like her make me sick inside.

My uncle crossed his arms. "I think we owe someone an apology,"

I nodded. "Yeah, you do. You need to apologize for making me come to this stupid camp in the first place."

He rolled his eyes. "You need to apologize to Tess, Shane."

I shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about, Brownie."

Uncle Brown poked my shoulder. "You know damn well what I'm talking about."

I shook my head. "Haven't a clue… honestly,"

Tess started to fake cry again. "Oh, he was so mean to me!"

I rolled my eyes. Dramatic bitch. "You know she's faking, right? She's just mad because I called her a bad dancer,"

"And he assaulted me!" Tess cried out.

I scoffed. "Did not! I pushed you in self-defense! You started it!"

"Self defense, my ass! You were trying to show off to the class. We all know you're not all mighty and powerful like you seem like, Shane. So stop picking on girls and get a life!"

"Me? You're telling _me_ to get a life? _Shane Gray_ needs to get a life? All right then, Miss-I'm-so-perfect-just-because-my-mom-is-a-famous-singer. FYI, most of us had to work our way to the top; we weren't born into royalty like you, Miss Thang Thang!"

Uncle Brown stepped in the middle of our argument. "All right, children. Settle down!"

I pointed to Tess and she pointed to me. "She started it!" "He started it!" we said at the same time.

My uncle sighed. "You two will have to settle this a better way, because obviously screaming at each other isn't working too well."

I nodded. "Yeah. Settle this like a man, Uncle Brownie!"

He made us follow him over to the lake. I gave Tess the evil eye the whole way down to the lake. There was a canoe sitting in the grass, and Uncle Brown pushed it in the water. "Get in," he ordered, handing us life jackets. I put on the lifejacket and got in the canoe.

Tess just stared at it. "There is no way I'm getting this new outfit wet!" she squealed.

I rolled my eyes. "Get in the damn canoe,"

She took the lifejacket from my uncle and stepped in the canoe. "Now what?" she asked.

Uncle Brown went over to the shed and got out two pool noodles. He threw them in the canoe and I grabbed the green one. Tess grabbed the blue one. My uncle gave us some paddles and then pushed us out further to the lake. "Have fun settling this out! Come back before dark!" he yelled after us and sat on the shore, watching us.

I stood up, causing the canoe to rock back and forth. "Get ready to die, Tess!" I yelled and whacked her hard with the noodle.

She screamed. "Don't hit a girl!" She stayed sitting down.

I whacked her again, causing the canoe to rock even more.

"Stop it, Shane! Don't make the canoe tip over!" Tess called out.

I smirked when I suddenly got an idea. I put one foot on each side of the canoe, standing in the middle, and then shifted my weight to each foot, causing the canoe to violently shake. Tess started screaming. "Stop! Stop!"

I shook it even more and then the whole canoe flipped over. I landed in the water with a splash and could faintly hear my uncle laugh. I smirked when I saw Tess screaming, her brand new dress soaked. I grabbed the noodle and whacked her again. She tried to shield herself with her hands.

Tess splashed around in the water, trying to swim her way back to shore, but I grabbed her leg. "Let's settle this, right here, right now!" I yelled at her.

She shook her head. "No! I'm cold and hungry! Let me go back to shore!"

I shook my head. "Not until we settle this properly. Now get your noodle and let's get back in the canoe."

Tess sighed and grabbed the noodle. She helped me tip the canoe back over. It took some effort, but I managed to get it back the right way and I got back in it. I helped Tess up and then I whacked her with the noodle, causing her to fall out. I laughed at her.

She tried to get back on the canoe, but I took the paddle and pushed the canoe back over to shore, laughing at her expense. She groaned and swam after me. "I'm gonna kill you, Shane Gray!"

I made it to the shore way faster than she did, and I pulled the canoe back up in the grass. I zoomed past my uncle. "Gotta go! Angry crack whore is going to kill me!" I called out after him.

"Shane Gray, you get back here right now!" Tess screamed.


	6. Opening Campfire

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 6**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I laughed as I ran towards the dining hall. I looked back and saw a soaking-wet Tess emerging from the lake, a huge frown on her angry face. "Shane! I'm gonna murder you!" This only made me laugh harder.

Tess raced after me, as fast as she could in her wet sneakers and she slip a bit. I continued running to the dining hall, leaving a trail of water on my way there. I stepped into the dining hall, and everyone looked at me. My clothes were soaking wet and so was my hair. I squeezed some water out of my shirt and then looked down at my pants. Since I was wearing my white skinny jeans, my blue boxers were showing through them. I shrugged and walked over to one of the tables.

Mitchie was sitting next to some Asian chick and some other girl. She gave me a weird look, so I sat down next to her, getting the bench soaking wet. The Asian girl scooted away from me. I looked at her. "I'm not gonna bite you… well, I might. But not right now," I smirked.

She stared at me. "I'm Ella," she said, holding out her hand for me to shake it.

I shook my head. "I don't touch other people,"

The other girl said, "Hi Shane, I'm Peggy. I'm a huge fan of your music!"

I smirked. Who isn't a huge fan of my music?

Ella looked around. "Has anyone seen Tess?"

I nodded and let out a quick huff of laughter. "Oh, I pushed her in the lake."

Mitchie smiled and whispered, "Awesome!"

The other two girls looked at each other, slightly smiling.

"I'm guessing you hate her too…even though you're her followers," I said.

They didn't say anything.

"Listen, I gotta run. I have more important things to do than hang out with you losers," I said and stood up from the table, grabbing another hotdog before I left. I went back to my cabin, eating my hotdog on the way. I looked out the window out to the lake.

When I caught a glimpse of Tess approaching my cabin, I ducked down and hid under the bed. Even though it was dusty and gross under there, I didn't want an angry girl to see me all alone in my room… who knows what would happen?

She went into my cabin. "Shane! I know you're in there! Come out so I can kick your ass!"

I stayed as quiet as I could. She groaned and then stormed out of my cabin. When the coast was clear, I got out from underneath the bed and went to go take a shower and changed into some dry clothes. I grabbed my guitar and decided to write a new song. I played around with some chords and then my phone rang. "What?" I barked. "I'm writing a new song here, God damn it!"

It was Jason. _"So how's my birdhouse coming along?"_

I scoffed and hung up the phone, throwing it down on my bed. I continued to play and wrote down some lyrics on a stray piece of paper.

"That's cool," I heard a voice. I looked up and saw Uncle Brown sitting down next to me. "It's like your old stuff,"

"Yeah," I nodded. "I was thinking our group could change up our sound," I shrugged. "Do some different stuff."

He nodded. "So are you coming out to the campfire tonight?"

I laughed. "Yeah right! Like I'd waste my time listening to those losers!"

"Well you sit in here by yourself, super star," Uncle Brown said and stood up. "You're right; you are way better than them."

I smirked. I _am_ way better than them.

X X X

It was beginning to get dark out and I had already finished eating dinner. I had written all of the new song I had been working on all day. It sounded great… as usual.

Everyone was heading over to the campfire. I sighed. Might as well join them and check out the competition – or lack of. I set down my guitar and put it back in its case. I walked over to the campfire. It took me a good five minutes to make my way over there, but I came just in time for the first song.

When I caught glimpse of the girls – Tess, Mitchie, Ella, Peggy, and other sluts – wearing those sparkly outfits, I smirked and leaned up against a tree, watching them from afar.

Tess began singing:

"_T__oo cool for my dress  
These shades don't leave my head  
Everything you say is so irrelevant  
You follow in my lead  
You want to be like me  
But you just don't want to be loved and hated  
I can't help the way I am  
Hope you don't misunderstand  
But I'm too cool  
Yeah I'm too cool  
To know you  
Don't take it personal  
Don't get emotional  
You know it's the truth  
I'm too cool for you  
You think your hot but I'm sorry, you're not  
Exactly who do you think you are  
Can tell you what you haven't got  
When we walk into the room  
I'm too cool for you  
Lucky I'm so nice  
Even I'm surprised  
You are still allowed to be in my crew  
Show you how it's done  
If you want to be someone_

_Just watch me and you'll learn some  
Me, myself, and I agree  
You'll never catch up with me  
Cause I'm too cool  
Yeah I'm_-" she stopped in mid sentence when she saw me.

"SHANE GRAY!" she screamed.

The music stopped and she stared at me. Everyone gasped and turned around to face me. I waved. "Hey, Tess," I folded my arms and walked over to the stage, kicking a stray rock on the way over.

She pointed me. "That's the one who pushed me in the lake!" she told all the campers.

I smirked. "I didn't actually _push_ you… you more of _fell_ in it. I just kind of helped the cause by tipping the canoe."

Tess groaned. "Shane you're going to pay for that! My brand-new dress is ruined thanks to you!" She scrunched up her face and clenched her fists.

I popped my knuckles. "Bring it, bitch!"

She screamed and then charged at me. Everyone in the audience gasped and I moved out of the way. Tess was wearing high heels so it was hard for her to run after me. I laughed at her expense and jumped off the stage. She still chased after me, and we ran all around the campfire. I hopped back on the stage and it took her a while to get up in her skimpy little slut dress. "Let's settle this once and for all!"

Tess nodded. "I'm gonna rip all your fugly hair out, asshole!" She charged at me and grabbed my beautiful hair.

"Hey! Ouch! Don't touch my hair!" I yelled and smacked her across the face. She fell to the ground and then scoffed. Tess got back up from the ground and pushed me. I pushed her back. We got closer and closer to the edge of the stage until she pushed me off and I screamed. I landed on my arm and hit my head on the hard ground. I heard something snap and cried out.

I doubled over in pain and a couple of kids ran over to me. "Too Cool" girl strutted off the stage, proud of herself.

Mitchie ran over to me. "Shane!" She kneeled down next to me.

My arm hurt like a bitch… I'll tell you that. Great. First my wrist is messed up, now my arm and my head? I moaned and closed my eyes, trying to make this disaster go away. Why did they make me come here?


	7. Broken Arms

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 7**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

"Ouch! Stop! It's like you people are clueless!" I yelled at the kids who were crowding around me. Wait a second, they _are_ clueless. I moaned softly and closed my eyes. I could tell that Mitchie and my uncle were sitting next to me.

Uncle Brown crouched down next to me. "Shane? Are you alright?"

I shook my head. "No… stupid, stupid camp…" I mumbled.

"What's wrong? What hurts?" he asked.

"My arm… and my head," I told him through tightly clenched teeth. When he touched my arm, I cried out. "What the fuck, Brownie!? That hurts!"

I opened my eyes, but the world was spinning and everyone looked like there were two of them. I moaned again and closed my eyes. "You all are strange…" I slurred.

"Shane? Shane, can you hear me?" I heard Uncle Brown's voice. It sounded like it was off in the distance.

I tried to speak but no words came out. I mumbled a bit instead and drifted off to sleep.

X X X

The next thing I know, I'm laying in my bed. I groaned and felt the throbbing pain in my head and arm. I turned the pillow over to get the cool side and then tried to fall back asleep. When I couldn't go back to sleep, I opened my eyes and saw my uncle sitting in a chair by my bed, watching me sleep. "Stalker…" I mumbled.

Uncle Brown kept on looking at me. "How are you? Feeling better?"

"What happened?" I asked, trying to sit up.

"You fell off the stage, broke your arm, hit your head, and passed out," he told me.

I sighed. Great. Just what I need – a broken arm. How will I play guitar now? I heard my stomach growl. "Hungry…" I mumbled and closed my eyes, pulling the blanket back over me.

Uncle Brown rolled his eyes. "Just this _one_ time will I bring you food to your cabin…" He set off and I smirked. I so could have gotten up and went to the dining hall, but this is better. I'll milk this whole broken-arm-passing-out thing for all it's worth.

He returned with a tray of plates including pizza, French fries, and two cookies. I happily took the tray and then looked down at it. "Since when do we eat pizza and fries for breakfast?"

"It's dinner time…" Uncle Brown told me.

I looked up at him. "Seriously? I slept that whole time?" He nodded. I ate a French fry. "Wow, I must have really been out of it…"

He nodded. "You were… You kind of went crazy and sleep talked."

"No way!" I exclaimed. Shane Gray does not do creepy things like that. "What exactly did I do?" Maybe it's not as bad as he's making it sound.

Uncle Brown sat down in the chair, watching me eat. "You just kind of moaned and mumbled, 'you're gonna pay for this, bitch!'"

I laughed. At least I wasn't calling out my deepest darkest secrets. That would be a little bad. I finished eating my lunch and then handed the tray to my uncle. "No go away; I need to sleep," I told him and faked a yawn.

He ruffled my hair a bit and then left. "Sleep well; you have to teach a class tomorrow,"

I fake-coughed. "Nope. I can't. Sorry, but I'm too sick."

"You were never actually sick…" Uncle Brown said with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Says you!" I called out after him. He left my room and I flipped over to my side, pulling the blanket over my head and closing my eyes.

Then, I heard a knock at my door. "Go away!" I called out from under my warm comforter.

The person invited himself or herself in, ignoring what I had said. "Hey, Shane."

I groaned. "I'm sleeping… go away!"

"You don't sound like your sleeping… unless you're sleep talking again."

I pulled the covers off of me and saw Mitchie standing over me. I pointed an accusing finger at her. "That never happened, ok?"

She laughed a bit. "Try telling that to the whole camp… they all heard you."

I sighed. "I didn't say anything too embarrassing, did I?"

Mitchie bit her lip. "Let's just say, if I were you, I'd hide that teddy bear."

"WHAT!?" I yelled. "I talked about Mr.Fuzzums?!"

She nodded. "And your… other embarrassing things."

I sighed and laid my head back on the pillow. I put my hands up on my face. "It was bad, wasn't it? As in never be seen again, bad? Cause I don't think my uncle told me the whole story."

"It was pretty bad…"she mumbled, sitting down on the edge of my bed. "You started saying really random things… One of them was," she mimicked me here – "Humma shumma leeeooobbaa estrogen ocean!"

"Oh God…" I whined and closed my eyes, shaking my head. "The things I say in a semi-conscious daze… Did I really say 'estrogen ocean'?"

Mitchie shrugged. "I'm sure everyone's already forgotten about it."

"Believe me; they haven't. People don't forget about these kinds of things. I hate enough people to know that."

"So why _do_ you hate everyone?"

"Cause I'm better than them."

"So being better than someone automatically gives you the right to be a total ass?"

I nodded. "Umm… yeah."

"So I heard you sing a new song…"

"I sang?" Since when?

"In your semi-conscious daze."

Wow. I'm awesome if I can be passed out and still sing.

"I liked it," she continued.

I raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

She nodded. "Can you sing it for me?"

I shook my head. "Nope. Now go away. I'm sleeping here."

Mitchie laughed a bit and then left me alone. I closed my eyes and drifted back to sleep.


	8. Pink Kitty Pajamas

**A\N: Yay!! 100 reviews!!**

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 8**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I woke up the next day and looked at my alarm clock. It was eleven… what? Since when did my uncle let me sleep in? I looked around. Something's not right here… Maybe it's because I'm outside! Why am I sleeping outside? Who put me here? I looked around and saw a bunch of girls giggling, pointing to me. I gasped when I looked down and saw that my teddy bear was lying next to me. I screamed and pulled the covers over my head.

My uncle was talking to me. "Sorry about this, Shane, but it was all too good to pass up the opportunity!"

I kept quiet underneath the blanket, not wanting to be seen by anyone. "Go away!" I called out.

He pulled the covers off of me. "I suggest you put on some different clothes…"

I looked down and saw that I was wearing some silky, pink pajamas with kittens on them. "Who did this to me?" I screamed.

Uncle Brown smirked.

"How could you, Brownie?!" I yelled.

He shrugged. "I just helped. You can blame Tess for this master plan," He pointed to Tess, who was leaning up against a tree. She smirked and waved at me.

My jaw dropped. That little bitch! Now not only do I have a broken arm, I just publicly humiliated myself all thanks to her. "This war has just begun, Tess! You wait and see!"

I jumped out of the bed, not caring that I was totally exposed in these small kitteny pajamas. I ran over to Tess and gave her a hard stare. "First, you accuse me of assault, when in reality, I just pushed you. Then, you get me in trouble with my uncle. After that, you break my arm! Now this? There's a place for people like you… and it's called Hell… and a mud puddle!"

She smirked. "A mud puddle?"

I nodded and grabbed her, pushing her over into the mud puddle that was by the tree. She made a huge splash, getting everyone around her, covered in mud. She screamed and wiped mud off of her. "Shane! I hate you!"

"You get what you deserve!" I yelled and stormed into my cabin, changing into normal clothes.

X X X

It was now noon. I changed into different clothes – anything other than pink kittens – and went off to the dining hall. Everyone was already lined up to get food. We were having spaghetti. I grabbed a plate and then sat down next to Mitchie.

"Oh my God, I saw what Tess did to you," Mitchie said and I sat down.

I nodded. "What a bitch."

"I know!" she gushed and ate her spaghetti.

Suddenly, Tess approached us.

"Speak of the devil…" I muttered, loud enough so that only Mitchie could hear.

Tess walked over to me, tipping her plate of spaghetti all over me. It got in my hair. "Whoops!" she let out a huff of laugher with a smirk played across her ugly face.

Oh that is it! I stood up and slammed my fist down on the table, loud enough to get everyone quiet. "TESS, YOU LITTLE FUCKER!" I screamed. Everyone was silent.

Tess shrugged. "Accidents happen."

I nodded. "You're right; they do," I took my hand and slapped her across the face. She fell to the ground, screaming and holding her cheek. "Whoops!" I mocked her. "Accidents happen,"

She scoffed and her little group helped her up. Ella and Peggy looked at me, with slight smiles on their faces, as if to say thanks for punching out their leader. I smiled at them. Tess grabbed Ella's plate of spaghetti and chucked some at me. It hit me at got all over my clothes. I smiled. "Thank you for doing that… now I can do this," I grabbed my plate of spaghetti (which had sauce on it) and threw all of it on Tess. She screamed and got some of the noodles out of her hair. "You're such a wet noodle, Tess!"

Tess grabbed some of the spaghetti and threw it back at me, but I dodged it and it flew across the room, only to hit Uncle Brown in the back of the head. He turned around and faced us. I pointed to Tess. "She threw it, Uncle Brownie!"

My uncle walked over to us. "Is this true, Miss Tyler?"

She stuttered. "Yes… but… but…"

"There will be no buts, young lady! It's ok if you hurt Shane," I scoffed when he said that, "but if I get covered in spaghetti, there will be severe punishments. Now follow me," he said and grabbed Tess's arm.

Tess tried to speak out in protest, but just scoffed.

I laughed. "I wish I had a douche bag to throw at you, Tess!" I called out after her.

She looked back at me and have me a hard glare.

I stuck out my tongue. "Ha ha!"

When she was out of sight, Ella and Peggy ran up to me, hugging me. "Thank you!" they squealed.

I pushed them away. "Don't touch me," I walked away from the scene of the crime and grabbed my guitar from my cabin, going down to the lake.


	9. Jason and Nate Come!

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 9**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

I sat down by some canoes by the lake and took out my guitar. I tried to play with my broken arm, but it just wasn't working out too well. I groaned and threw my guitar down. It probably just broke, but what does it matter? It's not like I can play it anymore. I stared out to the lake. I sighed and took out my song journal, writing down some lyrics. "Turn on that radio, as loud as it can go, gotta dance until my feet can't feel the ground." Hmm… that sounds pretty good. I quickly jotted it down.

"So, uh," I heard a voice. I quickly turned around. It was Mitchie. "Does your voice sound better over here?

"Why are you here?" I asked.

Mitchie looked taken a back. "I was just listening…"

I scoffed. "Yeah. Why do you think I came down here in the first place? I wanted peace and quiet! Can't people just leave me alone for a while?!"

"You are such an ass!"

"Yeah, well that's all part of the rock star image," I muttered and continued writing down lyrics.

She got up and walked away. I continued writing. "Say good-bye to all my fears… one good song and they disappear…"

After I had finished writing my song, I called Nate and Jason. "Guys! I just wrote a new song!"

_"Oh that's great!"_ Nate said.

"Yeah you guys need to come here and practice it with me!" I exclaimed.

_"Sure. We'll be there tomorrow around noon, kay?"_

"Bye," I said and hung up the phone. I got out some paper and wrote down all of the chords and music for it. It took me the rest of the day, but I got it down.

Around seven, I left my cabin and headed over to the dining hall to eat dinner. I grabbed my chicken and then went back to the cabin, perfecting the music. I sang it a couple times and then Uncle Brown came in. "That sounds good," he said.

I nodded. "I know. I wrote it, that's why."

Uncle Brown sat down in the chair next to me. "Do you want to perform it for all the campers?  
I shrugged. "Why not?" I wouldn't ever resist the opportunity to show off. "Jason and Nate are coming tomorrow around noon, and we're going to practice it."

"Ok, well whenever you guys have it perfected and performance ready, tell me and I'll get it all set up," he said and left my cabin.

I sang it one last time and then went to bed.

X X X

It was five minutes past noon. Where are they? I saw our limo pull up and Jason hopped out, guitar in hand. "I'm ready! Yeah!" he exclaimed, a little too over-excitedly. Nate walked out after him. I led them into my cabin and we read through the song together.

Once we had practiced it a couple thousand times, we played it for my uncle. Of course he loved it and wanted us to play it for the campers. So the next day, he set up the stage with amps and everything, and then gathered all of the campers up.

When they all sat down in front of the stage, Uncle Brown introduced us, and then we came out of the dining hall and started playing our song. Everyone loved it and they were cheering the whole time. I'm thinking this song could be a huge hit.

We bowed and then walked off the stage. A couple girls came over to us, asking for autographs, so we signed some stuff for them. Then, Tess came up to us. I nudged Jason and Nate. "This is the bitch I was talking about," I whispered to them.

Tess shook hands with Jason. Jason smiled. "Oh, you're the bitch, right?" he asked. Tess shot me a glance.

I put my arm on Jason's shoulder. "Yeah. She broke my arm. Which is why I couldn't play guitar with you guys,"

Jason nodded. "Yeah, thanks a lot, bitch."

"Whore," she shot back.

"Tramp," Jason sneered.

"Slut,"

"Cunt bucket!"

"Cunt bucket?" Tess asked. "What's that?"

"It's what you are!"

Nate stepped in between them. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Take it easy, you two!"

Jason rolled his eyes. "She broke his arm…" he muttered.

Nate shrugged. "True… true…" He looked back at Tess. "Fat dyke."

Tess scoffed. "I am not fat!"

I stepped in. "Now that Jason and Nate are here, prepare to face your worst nightmare," I said.

She sneered and then walked away.

Jason, Nate, and I went back to my cabin to plot some serious Tess-ass-kicking revenge.


	10. Super Spies!

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**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 10**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

We had the plan all ready. It took us most of the night to think of all the horrible things we could do to her, but we settled on a couple that didn't involve her falling into a pit of fire – I thought that might be a little too extreme. Then, Mitchie came into the cabin. "Go away," I sneered.

Mitchie ignored me. "I heard that you were plotting revenge on Tess… I want in."

I raised an eyebrow. "You got any good ideas?"

"We could push her in a campfire," Mitchie suggested.

I shook my head. "We voted 'no' against that one. Think of a good idea and maybe we'll let you in."

She shrugged. "You could just beat the crap out of her,"

I pondered my thoughts a bit and smirked when I thought of us beating Tess up. "You're in," I said and waved her over to our planning circle.

Mitchie smiled and sat down with us.

"So can you ask your mum to make us a diabolical cake?" I asked.

She smirked. "I could try,"

I high-fived her. "Welcome to the club, Mitch."

"So I was thinking we could have cool nicknames," Jason suggested.

I nodded. "I'm Sexy Beast… Nate is Tigger… Jason is Little Bunny Foo Foo… Mitchie is Poop Star."

"Poop Star?" Mitchie asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. You're Lemon Cookie. Got it?"

Mitchie shrugged. "Sure, Sexy Beast."

I smirked. "Fine then, Lemon Cookie. Our team name is the Hannah Montana crew."

"Why Hannah Montana? I hate her," Jason said.

I nodded. "Good point. We don't wanna give our team a bad name."

"How 'bout the MoFos?" Mitchie suggested.

"Good idea, Lemon Cookie," I smiled. "Now everyone has to use our nicknames so we don't give ourselves away. Also, we need walkie-talkies; that'd be cool,"

"Ooh!" Jason exclaimed and searched through his suitcase. He pulled out four walkie-talkies and handed us each one.

I took the walkie-talkie and then looked back at Jason. "Why do you have four walkie-talkies in your suitcase?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I thought we might want to play super-spies while we were here."

"Whatever," I shrugged. "Now we need a nickname for the bitch,"

Nate shrugged. "How 'bout… 'The Bitch?'"

I nodded. "Good idea, Tigger."

"Ooh!" Mitchie shouted. "I have a good idea!"

I turned to her. "What, Lemon Cookie?"

"When she's sleeping, let's go into her cabin and replace her shampoo with eggs!" she exclaimed, excited about her idea.

"Yeah!" My band and I chorused.

So, we had our first plan. We decided on just Mitchie going in and taking the shampoo. She was still staying in their cabin with The Bitch, so it wouldn't look as suspicious if Tess woke up and saw her.

When it was well past Midnight, Mitchie turned on her walkie-talkie. _"Lemon Cookie to MoFos. You there? Over,"_

I answered the radio. "Sexy Beast here. Is the plan a go? Over,"

"I'm going in. Over,"

"Be careful. Over,"

We didn't hear for her for a few seconds, but then she radioed us again. _"I got the weasel. Get ready to meet at the secret rabbit hole. Over,"_

I turned to Jason and Nate. "Let's go," We stood up and walked over to dining hall. Mitchie was standing by the entrance to the kitchen. I took the keys that I stole from Uncle Brown out of my pocket and unlocked the back door to the kitchen. I went over to the fridge and pulled out a carton of eggs. Mitchie poured out all of the expensive-looking shampoo in the sink and Jason and Nate cracked eggs, pouring them into the bottle.

Once it was about halfway full (like it was when we found it) I put the cap back on, and shook it up. When it was liquidy enough, Mitchie went back into her cabin and put it back in the same exact spot. She radioed us. _"Lemon Cookie to Sexy Beast. The weasel is back in the hiding place. I'm off to bed. 'Night. Over,"_

"'Night. Over," I said and turned off the walkie-talkie.

Jason and Nate were already asleep on the air mattresses Uncle Brown put on the ground. I hopped into my bed and got some well-deserved sleep.


	11. Everyone's Favorite Crack Whore

**A\N: Hello everyone!! I'm in Colorado right now and my internet really really sucks and so I won't be able to update as often as I will like and I'm really sorry because I know alot of people like this story and all, but I'm going to try my best! I'll be back at home in August and I'll try to update ASAP when I get back!! Love you all!**

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 11**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

The next morning, I woke up to a high-pitched screaming. I smirked when I realized it was Tess. Jason and Nate woke up, too. We looked at each other and laughed. Mitchie came into the cabin. "Holy shit, can you hear her scream?" she laughed and sat down in a chair.

I nodded and yawned. It was nine in the morning – way too early to be up and about. Jason, Nate, and I had fallen asleep in yesterday's clothes, being the lazy people we are. I'll tell you what, wearing skinny jeans to bed is not the most comfortable choice there is. I got out of bed and went outside. There was a mob of people gathered around the cabin a couple yards away – Tess's cabin.

I folded my arms and smirked when I saw Tess crying. Uncle Brown was there too, trying to get Tess to calm down. Over dramatic bitch. She pointed to me. "It was Shane! Shane did it!"

"What did Shane do?" I asked.

She walked over to me and poked me with an accusing finger. "You know damn well what you did!"

I shrugged. "I don't have a clue, actually. I heard screaming and came out here to see what was wrong."

Uncle Brown came over to me. "Did you do it?"

"Do what?" I asked, pretending to be totally clueless. It's a good thing I'm a good actor, otherwise this would have never worked out.

My uncle whispered, "You did it didn't you?" he was smiling.

I whispered back, "Oh yeah."

"Good job."

He walked away.

Tess called out after him. "Wait! Brown! Wait! We still haven't settled this! Something bad needs to happen to Shane!" She gave up when Uncle Brown kept on walking. Tess went over to me. "I know you did this! Wait until I get my hands on you!"

She stormed away.

"Thanks for breaking my arm, by the way!" I called out after her.

Tess held up her middle finger and went back into her cabin. I laughed a bit and then went back to my cabin. Jason and Nate had changed clothes and Mitchie was gone. I hopped back in my warm bed and went to sleep.

X X X

I was having a really crazy dream – I was robbing a Walmart. How crazy is that? Like I need to steal from a trashy place like that! All of the sudden, I heard someone talking. I opened my eyes and saw Mitchie standing over by my bed. "What? Are you still asleep? You lazy piece of shit!"

"Lazy – yes. Shit – no. I'm sleeping because it's summer and that's what we lazy people do," I explained, sitting up. "You know, that was really hostile and uncalled for."

She ignored me and continued talking. "We have to plan the next revenge. Today's our free day so we're going to do some planning. Jason and Nate are still eating lunch, but they will be here soon," Mitchie told me.

I nodded and went over to the table – our "Table Of Ass Kicking". I grabbed my notebook and a pen. "So I was thinking of some ideas, and I came up with a good one. Here's what we do – we fill a trashcan up with water and other crap and then we lean it up against Tess's door. We knock on the door and then run. When she opens the door, all the shit will pour out all over her!"

Mitchie laughed. "That's brilliant! But then again, I'll have to go find a new cabin…"

I shrugged. "Go stay in your mum's cabin."

She nodded. "Yeah. I'll go move later. Got any other ideas?"

I smirked. "Well I was thinking of some good sleeping pranks. We could duct tape her to her bed while she's sleeping… or we could grease her floor so when she wakes up she slides everywhere. We could write dirty messages on her when she's sleeping…"

By now, Mitchie was laughing really hard. "Stop! I'm gonna die of laughter! You need to write all of these down!"

"Already on it," I said as I began writing in my journal.

Nate and Jason came into the cabin.

"Oh, hey Mitchie!" Jason said as he sat down at the table.

Mitchie waved. "Hi. We were just thinking of major Tess sabotage. Shane, show him the list,"

I nodded and pushed the list toward my band members. They read it and laughed. Nate grabbed the pen and wrote some other ideas down. They were pretty clever, actually. I would have never thought of some of those things.

Jason put something about putting her in a sleeping bag with a rabid squirrel… that was taken off the list very quickly.

When we finished out list, it was around dinnertime. Damn, thinking of diabolical things really passes the time! It was time to put our first plan into action… We were going to take some of Tess's personal items and throw them into the boy's restroom of the dining hall, forcing her to go in there and get them.

While everyone went to the dining hall, Mitchie went into Tess's cabin and took some of her favorite stuff – one of which was her charm bracelet she just so happened to leave on her bed today. She brought her stuff into the dining hall and sat down with Jason, Nate, and me. Mitchie handed me the stuff and I stood up, heading over to the boy's restroom.

I held up the items. "Hey Tess!" I called out.

Tess turned around. "What?" she barked. Her jaw dropped when I opened the door to the boy's bathroom and threw her stuff inside of it. She shot up from her seat and raced over to me. "What the hell did you just do?"

I shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about,"

"Everyone saw you!" Tess argued.

I turned to the other campers. "Did anyone see me do anything?" I asked loud enough so that everyone could hear. Everyone shook his or her head. I turned back to Tess. "Looks like you have no witnesses,"

She scoffed. "I saw – I'm a witness,"

"You can not be your own witness,"

"Sure I can!"

"No… you can't. Now I suggest that you go get your stuff before I flush it down a toilet," I opened up the door to the bathroom.

"No!" Tess called out. She rolled her eyes. "I'll go get it," She went into the bathroom.

I turned to all the campers. "HEY EVERYONE!" I yelled. "TESS JUST WENT INTO THE BOY'S BATHROOM!"

Everyone looked over to me and they all started laughing. A few people came over to where I was to see if it was really true. I went back to my table and we laughed. Suddenly, Tess came out of the restroom carrying her stuff and everyone erupted into laughter.

She shot us a glance. I shrugged with a smirk played across my face. The bitch got what she deserved… and trust me, this wasn't the worse; we have plenty in store for everyone's favorite crack whore.


	12. SHANE IS GAY?

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 12**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

Mitchie moved into her mum's cabin. I told Jason and Nate about the trashcan thing. We are planning on doing it tomorrow – tonight we sleep and think of more ideas.

I hopped into my bed wearing red pajama bottoms and a black t-shirt. Jason and Nate hopped in their sleeping bags on the floor. I turned off the lights. "'Night," I said and pulled my blanket closer to me, closing my eyes. I thought of some more ideas as I drifted off to sleep.

X X X

The next morning, I felt the sun coming through the window. I groaned and flipped myself over. Only someone else was next to me. I opened my eyes and saw Jason right next to me. I screamed as loud as I could and he screamed too.

Suddenly, I realized where we were. I was in the same sleeping bag as Jason. On the floor. I slept on the floor? And since when did I sleep in the same sleeping bag as other guys?

Tess was standing in the doorway. "Wow Shane, I didn't know you were gay!"

I turned around to face her. "You little bitch!"

She smirked and walked away shouting, "Hey everyone! Shane and Jason are gay! They slept together!"

I heard some people laugh and chatter outside. I quickly hopped out of the sleeping bag. Jason looked at me. "Did you date rape me? Cause I don't remember having sex,"

"No! I'm not gay!" I defended and went over to the table of ass kicking. I wrote down some other ideas I thought of in my sleep.

Nate mumbled something. "What time is it? What's with all the screaming?" he slurred.

Jason turned to him. "Shane date raped me,"

"I did not!" I yelled. "Tess put us in the same sleeping bag,"

"Umm… I'm confused…" Nate said, getting out of his sleeping bag.

I rolled my eyes. "Jason – we did not have sex. I did not rape you."

"Oh ok," he said. Idiot.

Mitchie came into our cabin. "What's with all the screaming? And why is everyone saying you and Jason are gay?"

I rolled my eyes. "Tess put us in the same sleeping bag,"

She scoffed. "Bitch!"

"I know!"

Mitchie sat down at the table with me. "Planning anything new?"

I nodded. "We have to do the trashcan thing today. I was thinking during rest hour when everyone's in their cabin,"

"Yeah. I'll come and 'visit' you during that time and then we can do it," she said.

I smiled. Revenge is sweet. "Ok, let's go eat breakfast,"

Right before we could leave, Uncle Brown came into my cabin. "Who had sex?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes. "No one,"

"That's not what everyone is saying," he said, walking into the cabin. "I hope you used a condom. We don't want Mitchie here to leave here all knocked up. That would be bad for the camp… not to mention illegal,"

Mitchie scrunched up her face. "Ew. Like I'd ever do Shane,"

I rolled my eyes. "You'd pay to do me, don't deny it,"

"Would not!"

"Would to!"

"Would not!"

"Would to!"

Uncle Brown stepped in between us. "Did you guys have sex? Yes or no?"

"No!" we both exclaimed at the same time.

He folded his arms. "Then who did?"

Before I could say 'no one' Jason spoke up. "Shane and I,"

"WHAT?!" Uncle Brown yelled.

Jason shrugged. "He date raped me,"

I exploded. "I DID NOT!!" I turned to my uncle. "No one had sex. Tess told everyone we did and she put us in the same sleeping bag,"

Uncle Brown stared at us and then started laughing. "You guys better get that rumor under control…" he muttered and left our cabin.

I nodded. We do. Or… we could get back at Tess… Or we could get the rumor under control AND get back at Tess. That will work. "Let's go eat breakfast,"

We all left the cabin (even though we were wearing our pajamas – I'm lazy, remember?) and went into the dining hall. We all got our food and then sat down at our usual table.

"So during rest hour, we go do 'Operation White Trash.'" I told everyone.

"Why 'Operation White Trash'?" Jason asked. "I don't get it!"

I rolled my eyes. "Because Tess is white trash and we're going to pour trash into her cabin, remember?"

Jason nodded. "I get it now,"

We ate our food and thought of more thing we could do for revenge. Mitchie thought of putting blue Jello mix in her bed while she's sleeping and turn off the air conditioning so that she sweats and turns blue. I thought it was absolutely brilliant! We are so doing that tonight!

Because this whole week is free week, we are basically doing anything we want for seven whole days! This means planning, planning, planning. Mitchie thought of some really good ideas – I'm surprised she could think of such evil things! – like pushing her into the lake while she's asleep. Talk about brilliant!

After lunch, it was rest hour, so everyone was forced to stay in their cabins. We, of course, did the opposite. I got a trashcan from the dining hall and we filled it up about three-fourths way with water.

Jason helped me carry it over to Tess's door. We leaned the trashcan up against her door so that it would fall if the door opened and then knocked on her door. We ran as fast as we could back to our cabin and looked out my window.

Tess opened the door and the trash can fell over, pouring into her cabin. She screamed. Mitchie, Jason, Nate, and I laughed. I literally rolled on the floor from laughing so hard.

"I'm gonna pee my pants!" Jason exclaimed and ran into the bathroom.

Mitchie was rolling on the floor with me and Nate was pounding his fist on the table.

Then, the bitch herself stormed into our cabin, her legs soaking wet. "ASSHOLES!" she screamed. "YOU BETTER CLEAN UP MY CABIN RIGHT NOW!"

I stopped laughing and faced her. "What are you talking about? We didn't do anything,"

"Yes you did! You poured trash in my cabin!" she yelled.

Nate gave her a confused look. "I don't know what you're talking about. We were just sitting here talking about our European tour,"

Tess scoffed and went out the door, slamming it.

I looked at my friends and laughed. I stood up. "You guys think of more ideas – I'm gonna go do what you're supposed to do during rest hour and take a nap," I announced and hopped on my bed.

"You know there's a hammock outside by the lake, right?" Mitchie asked.

That sounds fun. "Cool. Thanks for telling me," I said and grabbed a pillow. I left the cabin and went down to the lake. I hopped on the hammock and took a nap.

X X X

I heard laughter. I felt… duct tape? On me? I opened my eyes and was staring at the ground. Suddenly, I realized that I was duct taped to the hammock and I was put upside down! I screamed and tried to move my arms. They were pretty much immobile and attached to the hammock. I tried to move my legs put they were taped down.

Tess was talking. "Promise to clean up my cabin and I'll let you down,"

I scoffed. "No way. Let me down or I'll kill you,"

She let out a huff of laughter and then started rocking the hammock. "What? What are you doing?" I asked.

I started swinging back and forth. The swinging got violent and I got really scared – I'm not the type to go on roller coasters. I screamed. "HELP! HELP! JASON! NATE!"

Finally, my band members came to my rescue. I heard arguing. Tess stopped swinging the hammock and someone started cutting the duct tape off of me. I gained use of my legs and then I fell onto the ground. I got up.

Uncle Brown was laughing – he's a great guy – and Mitchie was screaming at Tess. I brushed the dirt off of me and walked over to Tess. "Ha, ha. Funny. I didn't think you had it in you to think of something that smart; you always struck me as the blonde bimbo type,"

"Call me a blonde bimbo again and I'll push you in the lake," she threatened.

"If you push me in the lake, then I'll get my cast wet and that won't be good for either of us," I replied.

She scoffed. I picked her up and put her over my shoulder. "What? Stop! Put me down! Shane Gray do you hear me!? Put me down!" she screamed as I walked closer to the lake. I got on the dock and went as far out as I could to the lake. Tess was screaming and hitting me, trying to kick me in the balls.

I threw her and she screamed. She grabbed onto me, sending me flying too. We both tumbled into the lake and I gasped for air as I surfaced. "Tess! I can't get my cast wet!"

"I can't get my shoes wet!" she replied.

I scoffed and swam back to the camp. Tess followed me. I got back on the ground and went over to Uncle Brown. "Brownie we have a problem. Last time I checked, you're not supposed to get casts wet,"

Uncle Brown sighed and turned to Tess. "TESS TYLER!" He boomed.

Tess bit her lip and approached my uncle. "Yes?" she asked in a wimpy voice.

"You're in big trouble young lady…" he muttered and grabbed her hand. "Shane, I'll have to take you to the hospital and get you a new cast," he turned to Tess. "As for you… kitchen duty. You will be helping out there until you learn your lesson,"

Tess's jaw dropped. "But he poured trash into my cabin!"

"That's what that smell was?" Uncle Brown asked. "You better clean that up, too. You don't want raccoons!"

Tess scoffed and went to the dining hall.

I turned to Uncle Brown. "Way to punish the bitch, Brownie!"

He shrugged. "Well she _is_ a bitch. Now come on," Uncle Brown led me to my cabin. "Get a towel; I don't want my car wet," he said.

I went into my cabin and grabbed a towel from my bathroom. I came out of the cabin and saw Mitchie, Jason, and Nate. "You guys coming with?" I asked.

They nodded. We all got into Uncle Brown's car and Brownie drove to the hospital. I got a new cast and we made it back to the camp around dinnertime. Awesome. Time for some serious revenge.


	13. Makeovers

**A\n: Happy Fourth of July, everyone! Ohmigosh, the JB tour starts TODAY! I'm so excited!  
**

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 13**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I sat down at the planning table. "So I was thinking Blonde Bimbo could use a hair appointment," I said and smirked.

Jason nodded. "Yeah. We should take her to Seventeen spa and salon,"

Mitchie gave Jason a weird look. "No. Just… just don't talk, ok?"

I continued talking about my plan. "Let's put black hair dye in her shampoo!"

Nate's face lit up. "Yeah!"

"I know; my ideas are just so awesome," I gushed and ate some of my pizza.

"Are we still gonna do the Jello thing?" Mitchie asked.

I nodded. "Of course."

After we planned some more, it was well past eleven. Uncle Brown came into the cabin. "Sorry to ruin your revenge planning, but Mitchie has to go back to her own cabin – camp rules,"

Mitchie sighed. "Fine. But I really don't get the point of that – just because I'm a girl and he's a guy doesn't mean we're gonna rape each other," she left our cabin.

I nodded. "Those rules are stupid, Brownie,"

He shrugged. "I know. I didn't make them," he sat down at the table. "So what have you been planning?" I like how my uncle is on our side.

I showed him the planning journal. "We want to put blue Jello powder in Tess's bed and then turn off the air conditioning so that she sweats and turns blue! Also, we want to put black hair dye in her shampoo,"

Uncle Brown laughed. "I could help you pull that off. I'll go buy hair dye and Jello mix," he stood up.

"Thanks Brownie!" I said. "Make sure to wake us up when you come back, ok?" My uncle nodded and left the cabin.

I went over to my bed. Jason and Nate got in their sleeping bags. I closed my eyes and slept while I waited for my uncle to come back.

"Hey. Wake up," I heard a voice. It was Uncle Brown.

I opened my sleepy eyes. "Did you get the stuff?" I asked.

He nodded. I yawned and got out of my warm blanket. I kicked Jason and Nate. "Wake up," I barked. They immediately awoke and got out of their sleeping bags.

Uncle Brown gave me a Walmart bag that had Jello mix and hair dye. I took the stuff out and we (including Uncle Brown) went over to Tess's cabin. Uncle Brown turned off the air conditioning and set the temperature to ninety. With the help of Jason and Nate, I poured the Jello mix on Tess all over her face, legs, and arms – anywhere that wasn't covered by clothes. Luckily she was wearing a tank top so it made it all the easier.

I put the black hair dye in the shampoo bottle and slipped it back to its proper location. It looked as if no one had been here. We left as quickly and as quietly as we could and waited for the morning.

X X X

There was screaming. I laughed and then went back to sleep. Around ten, I woke up again, hungry for breakfast. Jason and Nate were still sleeping so I decided not to wake them up. I went to the dining hall, only to see Tess standing there, her hair black and her skin blue.

I laughed. If only I had a camera. I went over to her. "Feeling blue today?" I smirked and grabbed a waffle. Tess's arms were a dark blue and so were her legs. Her face was a lighter colored blue and her blonde hair was now black. "Papa smurf would be so proud,"

Tess let out a huff of laughter. "Love the nails, darling,"

"What are you talking about?" I asked and looked at my hands. My nails were painted pink with red hearts on them! I gasped. "Oh no you didn't!"

"Oh yes I did!" she smirked and strutted over to her table.

I had a sudden urge to rip her apart, limb by limb. I cursed under my breath and went over to Mitchie's table. "She painted my nails," I said.

She nodded and bit her lip. "I saw when you walked in," she stabbed her waffle with her fork.

I groaned. I bet that everyone's seen the work of the bitch by now. I ignored the giggles from people hoping that they were about Tess – I mean if you saw her you wouldn't be able to help but to laugh.

Some random girl came up to me. "Oh my God! It's true! You actually are gay!"

That's it. I stood up and walked to the front of the dining hall. I stood on a box and got everyone's attention. "JUST TO SET THINGS STRAIGHT," (Literally.) I yelled so that everyone could hear, "I AM NOT GAY! TESS PUT JASON AND ME IN THE SAME SLEEPING BAG AND PAINTED MY NAILS,"

Some people started laughing and I pointed to Tess. "But don't worry; she's a smurf now so we're even," I let out a huff of laughter and went back to the table.

Tess stood up. "So if you're not gay, then why did you shave your legs?"

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

She pointed to my legs. "They're freshly shaved,"

I rolled up my long pants and saw that they were indeed shaved. How did I not notice this when I slept?! I rolled my pants back down and held up my middle finger. I gave Tess a glare as I went back to my table. "She fucking shaved my legs…" I mumbled.

Mitchie sighed. "What a fat cunt dyke whore slut bitch,"

"You said it…"

Jason and Nate sat down next to us. I turned to them. "Guess what? The bitch painted my nails and shaved my legs,"

"Ew," Nate complained and got up from the table.

Jason gave me a weird look. "Why did she paint your nails?"

I shrugged. "Maybe cause we turned her blue and dyed her hair black,"


	14. Hiking and Tents

12am3pm 1am4pm 2am5pm 3am6pm 4am7pm 5am8pm 6am9pm 7am10p m8am11 pm9am1 2am10am1am11am2am12pm3am1pm4am2pm5am3pm6am4pm7am5pm8am6

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 14**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

Well apparently, everyone in camp is going hiking. I, of course, want to do anything _but_ hiking, but apparently I have no choice. Right now I'm packing my backpack. Oh and you know what's even better? We're spending five whole nights in a tent. A fucking tent! Shoot me now…

Jason, Nate, and I will be sharing a tent. Uncle Brown gave me a tent all nicely and neatly tucked away into a little bag. Jason's carrying it. I shoved the tent at Jason and he gave me a confused look. Nate was carrying his own backpack and so was I.

Wait a second… Is this really such a bad thing? We could get back at Tess… Hmm. This could get very interesting… I grabbed my walkie-talkie. "Sexy Beast to Lemon Cookie. You there? Over,"

A few moments later I heard, "Lemon Cookie here. Over,"

"Come to the MoFo cabin. Over,"

"Be right there. Over,"

I went over to the planning table and started thinking of ideas. Jason and Nate sat down next to me. Nate wrote down two really good ideas and then Mitchie came. "Hey," I said. "Sit,"

She sat down at the table and looked at the journal. "Planning something for the hiking trip?"

I nodded. "Any ideas?"

"Yeah," she said and grabbed the journal from Nate. She started scribbling in it… she was… drawing?

"What the hell are you drawing?" I asked.

"A cartoon," she replied, like it was nothing out of the ordinary.

I looked over at it, but she covered it up with her hands. "Wait 'till I'm finished! Gees Louise!" I rolled my eyes and sat back down.

After a couple minutes, she showed it to me. I laughed. She drew some stick figures, supposedly Mitchie, Tess, and me. One of the pictures was us pushing her off a cliff. Another one was a bear attacking her tent, and the last one was me telling a scary ghost story and then a ghost attacking her. Hey, that last one could actually be do-able!

I pointed to the last picture. "Let's do that," I said.

She nodded. "Yeah. But how?"

I pondered (whoa that's a big word!) this for a moment. "We could get Brownie to tell a scary ghost story or something and then when Tess is sleeping, pretend to be that ghost!"

"Or! Or! Or!" Jason screeched.

"What are you? A seal?" I asked.

"Or we could record some scary message and play it all night long in her tent. Like record 'they are coming for you' and play it really low at night," Jason suggested.

I gave Jason a weird look. "I didn't know you were smart. That's brilliant!"

"I'm not an idiot…" he muttered.

"Yes you are,"

He sighed. "Fine,"

Uncle Brown knocked on the door to my cabin. "We're leaving soon," he informed us. I let out a loud groan, telling my uncle that I really didn't want to do this. I grabbed my backpack and slung it over my shoulder. "Yeah, yeah. Piss and moan all you want but you're still going," Uncle Brown told me.

We went out of the cabin and gathered around by the other campers at the dining hall. I kicked the dirt a couple of times and threw some rocks. I didn't attempt to hit anyone, but I think I might have gotten a couple of stupid kids.

When everyone was ready, we all began walking. After a couple minutes I groaned. "Are we there yet, Brownie?" I asked.

My uncle shook his head. "We haven't even gotten out of camp yet,"

Ugh. This is going to be a long day.

We kept on walking. Finally, we made it to the mountain and then actually started hiking. And boy it was NOT easy. I kept on tripping a couple of times. "Fucking rocks…" I mumbled.

Then, I tripped over a tree stump and fell flat on my face. Everyone stopped and looked at me. I screamed a couple of swear words and then got back up, only to see that my leg was bleeding. "Great," I mumbled. "Now I'm gonna die,"

"You're not going to die," Uncle Brown retorted.

"You don't know that, Brownie! RABIES! RABIES! RABIES!" I yelled. I think everyone thinks I'm crazy.

Uncle Brown grabbed my arm. "Shh! You're being really embarrassing!" he whispered.

I rolled my eyes and continued hiking. I saw a squirrel. I pointed to it. "I bet that squirrel has rabies. Rabies, Brownie, rabies! You know people can die from rabies, right? So, we could die out here. I think we should turn back,"

My uncle ignored me and we kept on hiking. I started fake coughing. "Oh no, I think I have the flu or rabies. Well, I better go back to camp; no point in getting everyone sick," I said and turned around.

Uncle Brown grabbed my arm. "Stop being retarded and suck it up!"

I sighed and turned back around, continuing to go on the death march up the mountain. I kept on groaning and letting out over-dramatic sighs. If I were my uncle Brown, I'd be pretty mad at myself right now.

Around dinnertime, we finally made it to the top of Mount Kill Yourself and we set up all of our tents. Jason was having a hard time trying to get the damn tent out of the bag and Uncle Brown came over to us. "Helpless pieces of shit…" he muttered and set up our tent.

I waited until Nate set up the sleeping bags in the tent to get in it. "Hello tent," I said as I went in it. "My name's Shane… and I hate your fucking guts,"

Nate and Jason gave me confused looks as I crawled in my sleeping bag. "What?" I asked. "I'm tired. Leave me alone and got get me a hot dog or something," I ordered them and laid my head on the pillow.

They shrugged and set off. About fifteen minutes later, they returned with a plate of food. I ate it and then shoved the plate back at Nate. "Throw it away for me," I commanded.

Nate rolled his eyes and left the tent. Jason fell asleep in the sleeping bag to the far right and I was on the far left. Nate slept in the middle.

Right before I drifted off to dream land, I began to think about this whole situation. I'm in a tent. In the wilderness. There are bugs. And bears. And rabid squirrels. And I just ate a hot dog. I hate hot dogs. Oh, and I need to plot revenge on Tess. Hopefully a rabid squirrel will bite her.


	15. Being Sick Sucks

12am3pm 1am4pm 2am5pm 3am6pm 4am7pm 5am8pm 6am9pm 7am10p m8am11 pm9am1 2am10am1am11am2am12pm3am1pm4am2pm5am3pm6am4pm7am5pm8am6

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 15**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

"Shane, you gotta wake up," Uncle Brown is pushing me. "Wake up!"

I groaned and muttered something. I don't even know what I muttered, that's how out of it I am.

Uncle Brown sighed. "Shane, why do you always do this to me?"

I groaned again. "I'm sick…" I said in a wimpy voice. That's not a lie; I really am sick. My head is killing me and I feel like death. Is that even possible to feel like death? I mean, do most people feel like death? Other than the grim reaper, of course. Oh, listen to me rant! I must be sicker than I thought.

"No you're not," my uncle scoffed.

"Yes I am," I mumbled. "God damn forest… I think I have rabies,"

Uncle Brown scoffed. "You do not have rabies!"

I moaned and pulled the sleeping bag over my head. "Piss off, Brownie!"

He sighed. "Don't make me get Tess in here to wake you up,"

I stayed silent.

I heard him leave the tent. "Tess!" he called out. Great. Perfect. Just my luck.

All of the sudden, I felt someone pouncing on me. "Get up you lazy piece of shit!" she screamed while she punched me. I punched her back and then coughed on her. She shrieked and then ran out of the tent. I weakly got up from my sleeping bag and walked out of the tent, feeling slightly dizzy.

I went over to my uncle and leaned up against him for support. Even walking three feet sucked the life out of me. Mitchie came up to me. "Wow. You look like hell,"

I nodded. "I know," I coughed a bit on Uncle Brown but made it seem like an accident. He rolled his eyes and walked away. Why doesn't he believe me? I'm a trust worthy person! Ok maybe I'm not, but that's not the point.

"So are you actually sick? Or are you faking?" Mitchie asked.

I nodded. "Yes," I said and went over to Nate and Jason

"Wait. Yes to what question?" she asked, chasing after me.

Nate turned to face me. "Whoa! You look like you died!"

I rolled my eyes. "Thanks,"

Jason gave me a weird look. "Is that you, Shane?"

I sat down on a log and buried my hands in my face. I was so exhausted and I don't even know why. Being sick sucks.

Tess walked over to me. "You're such a fucking faker. Give it up; we all know you're lying,"

I looked up at Tess. "I HOPE YOU GET CANCER AND DIE!" I yelled.

"Come on dude, that's not funny. Don't joke about those things," Nate said.

"Who's joking?" I asked.

Tess rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Asshole…" she muttered and walked away. I buried my hands in my face again and moaned.

"Ok everyone, let's go," Uncle Brown said.

Mitchie helped me up and we walked somewhere. I don't even know where we were going. My eyes were closed and Mitchie was guiding me. After a while, I started to wonder where we were going. I opened my eyes and looked around. It seemed like we were heading back to camp. Wait, why are we going back? I thought we were staying in tents! Whatever… I closed my eyes again and let Mitchie lead the way.

We continued our death march down the mountain. I tripped over a rock and fell down. I was too tired to scream and make a big deal about it, so Jason and Nate just helped me up and we continued walking.

We stopped by the lake. I sat down on the sand and closed my eyes. I laid back and moaned loud enough so that my uncle could hear me. When I didn't get any response, I moaned louder and more obnoxiously than before. Uncle Brown sat down next to me. I opened my eyes and looked around. This place didn't look like camp. I think we're on the other side of the lake or something. I saw Uncle Brown and moaned… again.

"You must really hate hiking," Uncle Brown said.

I nodded. "That and the fact that it's even worse when you're sick,"

Uncle Brown rolled his eyes. "Will you give it up already? I know you're not sick so you can just stop,"

"I am sick," I said and coughed.

"Well you're a good actor," he said and got up. Douche bag.

"I'm not faking!" I called out after him.

He kept on walking away. I looked out at everyone and they were all swimming in the lake. I watched as Jason and Nate wrestled each other – God knows what they're fighting about. Mitchie was trying to get them to stop but then she gave up and went over to me. "Hi Shane," she said and sat down on a towel next to me.

"Ugh…" I mumbled too tired to say anything else. I'm speaking caveman now.

"Are you feeling any better?" she asked.

"Ugh…" I lay down and closed my eyes.

"Wow, you really are sick,"

"I told you…"

"I'll go get your uncle,"

"Tell him… he's a douche bag,"

Mitchie got up and walked away. I sighed and waited. Uncle Brown and Mitchie returned.

"I think he really is sick," Mitchie told him.

My uncle rolled his eyes. "And you believe him?"

"Uh… yeah?" she said.

Uncle Brown kneeled down next to me and put his hand on my forehead. "Holy crap! You're burning up!" (I'm slipping into the lava, and I can't keep from going under.)

"I told you so…" I muttered. Then, I threw up in the grass. Yucky.

"We better get you back to the camp and let you rest," my uncle told me.

I grumbled. "Too tired… Can't I just lay here and die?"

"You're not gonna die,"

"If I have rabies I will,"

"You don't have rabies,"

After a very long and torturous journey back up the mountain, we made it back to the tents and I crawled in Uncle Brown's (It was the closest.) He gave me a weird look, but I just quickly fell asleep.

X X X

I woke up feeling better. I have no idea what time it is or even what day. I opened my eyes and looked around. It was light out so I assumed it was noonish. I tried to go back to sleep, but I couldn't so I decided to snoop around. I looked in my uncle's backpack and found some pretty interesting stuff.

A bottle of whipped cream, eh? Hmmm… I have an idea. I shook the can and squirted the whipped cream in my mouth. I stood up and walked out of the tent. I saw Uncle Brown sitting on a log, reading a book.

I snuck up behind him and then jumped in front of him shouting, "RABIES!! RABIES!!" and allowed a bit of the whipped cream to ooze out of my mouth.

He screamed and dropped his book in the dirt.

I yelled some more. "RABIES! I HAVE RABIES!! RAWR!!"

Uncle Brown jumped up and ran. I laughed. Heh heh… rabies.


	16. RRRAABBIIEESSS!

**A\N: Ohmigosh! Over 300 reviews?! You guys are amazing! I'd never thought I'd ever get so many reviews! Thanks so much everyone, really! I feel like a freaking celebrity!  
**

**Ok, so I've been dying to put this chapter up ever since I wrote it! I'm sure you all will love it!**

**Chapter 16**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

"That wasn't funny, Shane," Uncle Brown told me. I could tell that he was still scared.

I was still laughing. "Yes it was! You scream like a girl!"

He rolled his eyes. "I take it you're not sick anymore?"

I shrugged. "I dunno," I licked the rest of the whipped cream off of my face.

Mitchie came over to us. "What's with all the screaming?" she asked.

I laughed again. "I pretended to have rabies and scared the crap out of my uncle."

She snickered. "That _is_ pretty funny,"

"I know!" I gushed.

My uncle rolled his eyes again. "That wasn't funny at all," He mumbled something and then walked away.

Jason and Nate came over to me. "Hey," Nate greeted. "Are you not sick anymore?"

I nodded. "I feel better,"

He smiled. "Cool cause we want to go exploring. Want to come?"

I shrugged. "It's not like I have anything better to do,"

"Cool. Let's go," Nate said. He led the way as Mitchie, Jason, and I followed.

We walked past Tess. "Where are you going?" she asked.

I shrugged. "Places."

"Good luck with that," she sneered.

We went through the forest and I saw a couple of birds. Jason pointed to every single one of them. "BIRD!" he would shout and they would fly away. Then every time it would fly away, he would ask, "Why do they keep running away from me?!" And every time I would tell him he's an idiot and he would ask why… Hmmm…

Our little journey through the woods was cut short when we came across a cave. It was dark and scary and dripping. Mitchie looked inside. "I don't think anything's in there; let's go!"

I shook my head. "My mommy always taught me to stay away from dark caves,"

She scoffed. "Don't be such a baby! If you want you can hold my hand,"

"Uhh… no. Just stay away from the cave, ok?" I told her.

Mitchie went closer to the cave. "I'm gonna go in,"

"No! Stop! You'll get rabies!" I yelled.

She laughed. "Why are you so worried about rabies?"

"Because we're in the wilderness!" I defended.

Nate stepped up. "Yeah. Don't go in there, Mitchie. It could be potentially deadly!"

"Sure it could," she rolled her eyes. "I'm going in. Follow me if you dare,"

She slipped inside the cave and didn't even look back. Jason, Nate, and I exchanged glances. Suddenly, we heard a ear-piercing scream from inside the cave.

"MITCHIE!" I yelled and ran into the cave. It was really dark but the light from the entrance helped me navigate. I went down a tunnel and saw Mitchie sitting on the floor laughing her ass off. "That wasn't funny!" I exclaimed, nearing her. "You almost gave me a heart attack! I thought something scary happened!"

Mitchie looked up at me. "So you ran into a dark cave to save me? That's really heroic,"

I nodded. "Yeah. Now let's leave before something bad happens, ok?"

Jason and Nate came running towards us. "Are you ok?" Nate asked.

Mitchie got up from the floor. "Yeah. I just screamed so you guys would come in here,"

Nate scoffed. "That's not funny! I thought you were in danger!"

She rolled her eyes. "Can you people not take a joke?"

We shook our heads. "No," we said at the same time.

"Whatever. Let's go explore the cave," she said and started walking. I followed close behind.

"If something pops out and kills us, I'm blaming you," I said.

Mitchie let out a huff of laughter and we continued walking.

Suddenly, I heard something screech and something sounded like birds… only it wasn't a bird. A giant swarm of bats were heading straight towards us. I screamed as they flew past us. I felt something sharp poke into me and I looked down, only to see one of them biting me.

"Bats!" I screamed and pulled the bat off of my arm. It flew away and I looked down at my arm. It was bleeding as the bat had pierced my skin. I screamed. "I HAVE RABIES! I HAVE RABIES!"

Nate came rushing over to me. "Oh my God! It bit you! You _do_ have rabies!"

I nodded, tears falling down my cheeks. "Oh my God! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die!"

Mitchie looked at my arm. "Crap. We have to go back to camp right now," she said.

We ran out of the cave and back to the campsite with the tents. I was crying my eyes out and so was Jason. When we got back, I screamed, "RABIES! RABIES! I HAVE RABIES! I'M RABID!"

Tess looked over at me. "Rabies, eh?"

I stopped running and faced her. "I. HAVE. RABIES!"

"No you don't. You're such a faker," she sneered.

I narrowed my eyes. "Call me a faker again and I'll… I'll…"

"You'll what?" she asked.

"I'll bite you!" I threatened.

She let out a huff of laughter. "Sure."

I screamed in rage and then ran over to her, biting her arm, causing her to bleed. "OH MY GOD!" she yelled and shook me away. "You fucking asshole!"

"Now you have rabies, too! Ha ha!" I yelled.

Tess screamed and it was the loudest scream I've ever heard. "YOU GAVE ME RABIES?!"

Mitchie grabbed my arm and pulled me away. "We have to go tell your uncle,"

I nodded and ran over to my uncle. "Brownie! Brownie!"

"What? What?" he asked as he turned around.

I held out my arm. "RABIES! RABIES! I'm gonna die! I have rabies!"

Uncle Brown looked at my arm. "Oh my God!" he breathed. "What bit you?"

"A bat!" I cried.

Tess came running over to us. "RABIES! I HAVE RABIES!"

My uncle turned to her. "Did a bat bite you too?"

She shook her head and pointed to me. "No. Shane did! He bit me!"

He turned to me. "You bit her? And gave her rabies?"

"Well she was being mean!" I defended.

Tess started crying. "I'm gonna die! We're all gonna die!"

I ran around in a circle screaming. "RABIES!! I'M RABID!!" I fell to my knees and crawled around in a circle, growling and using my saliva to foam at the mouth. I made weird noises and thrashed around from side to side. "RRAAAABBBIIIIEEESSSSS!" I screeched. I rolled around in the dirt and hissed some more. "We're all gonna die!! It's the end of the world!!"


	17. Hospitals

12am3pm 1am4pm 2am5pm 3am6pm 4am7pm 5am8pm 6am9pm 7am10p m8am11 pm9am1 2am10am1am11am2am12pm3am1pm4am2pm5am3pm6am4pm7am5pm8am6

**A\N: House MD characters are in this!**

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 17**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

Tess began sobbing uncontrollably, her body shaking violently. "I have rabies!!" she sobbed.

By now, all of the other campers gathered around in a circle to see what was happening. Uncle Brown was trying to get us to calm down and stop crying. A couple people were laughing, but everyone else was silent and shocked. I mean, we had rabies for God's sake!

I continued rolling in the dirt. "RAAABBBIIIEEESSSS!" I hissed and growled, more saliva making me foam at the mouth.

"Calm the fuck down!" Uncle Brownie boomed.

I stopped hissing and looked up at him.

He took in a deep breath and then let it out. "We better get you two to a hospital right away,"

I stood up and brushed off dirt from my clothes. Tess wiped away her tears and we followed Uncle Brown down the mountain. We practically ran down the mountain and when we got back to camp, we hopped in his car. I sat in the front seat. Uncle Brown looked at me. "You better not bite me,"

My uncle drove us to the nearest town and he parked illegally by the emergency room. He ran over to the front desk. "Two of my campers were bit by a rabid animal," he told the nurse.

"Well actually," Tess started, "only he got bit by the rat with wings, and _he_ bit _me_," Tess glared at me. "I hate your fucking guts,"

"Right back at you," I said.

We were led into the hospital and Tess went into one room, I in the other. Uncle Brown waited outside. I sat down on the little bed thing and waited. The room was scary… I'm the kind of person who hates hospitals.

The doctor came in the room. He was wearing a sweater vest. What a nerd. "Hi, I'm Doctor Wilson," He looked at me, confused. "Are you… Shane Gray?"

I nodded. "Yup,"

"My friend likes your music. I'm always hearing about you. Do you mind if I call him and tell him you're here?" he asked.

"Sure," I replied sarcastically. "I'll just die here. But that's ok, you go ahead and call your friend,"

He picked up his phone and dialed a number. "House, you'll never guess who has rabies!"

A few moments later, another doctor with a cane limped into the room. He closed the door. "Well, well. Shane gray has rabies. How cool is that?"

"Not cool," I replied.

"Of course it is!" he exclaimed, a little to excited. "I mean, you could die! I want credit for saving Shane Gray's life!"

Doctor Wilson turned to him. "Technically, I'm saving his life."

I coughed. They both turned to me. "In case you were wondering, I'm dying. So if you could do doctor stuff that'd be much appreciated."

House – I think that's his name – sat down in a chair. "Should I go get popcorn?"

"Yes. Please leave," I said.

He stood up. "I'll go get snacks. This is going to be one hell of a night,"

"Don't make me bite you!" I called out after him.

House turned to me. "Ooh, I'm so scared!" he replied sarcastically and limped out the door.

The nerdy doctor turned to me. "So what happened exactly?"

I told him the story. "Well first I was sick with the flu or something and my uncle didn't believe me so he made me go hiking even though I didn't want to and I was extremely tired. So then he believed me and I slept in his tent and then I took his whipped cream and put it in my mouth and then scared the crap out of him and told him I had rabies,"

He looked confused. "Wait, so you weren't bitten by a bat? This is all a joke?"

I shook my head. "I haven't gotten to the cave part yet,"

"So you putting whipped cream in your mouth has nothing to do with actually getting rabies?"

"Uh… no. But I'm getting there; hold your water. Ok, so after my uncle ran away screaming, my friends came over to me and asked me if I wanted to go exploring. So, we went into some cave and there were all these bats and one of them bit me and so then I ran back to camp screaming, 'HOLY SHIT I HAVE RABIES!' And some girl, her name's Tess, she's the biggest bitch in the whole world, she said that I was a faker, so I bit her and so now here we are!" I told the whole story in super-speed mode. "Did you get all that?"

Wilson slowly nodded. "Yeah… A bat bit you? Do you have this bat?"

I scoffed. "No."

"Did you call animal control? Wash the wound with soap and water?"

I shook my head. "Nope. We just kind of… came here."

He sighed. "Ok then. Let me clean off the wound and I'll have to vaccinate you for rabies; it's better to be safe than sorry, especially when you're not sure if the bat had the disease,"

"Okey dokey," I said. He walked over to the cabinets and pulled out some medical stuff. He put something on my arm, which hurt like hell, mind you. "It burnnsssss!" I complained a little too over-dramatically. I could tell that my doctor didn't like me because he just kind of ignored me and didn't say anything. He walked back over to the cabinets, rummaging through them.

House came back in the room. "Did I miss anything?" he was carrying a bag of popcorn and he sat down on the chair, eating it. I shot him a glance. He stared back at me. Then, his pager went off. "I gotta go; my patient's gonna have a massive heart attack," He left the room.

"Is it ok if I hate his guts?" I asked.

Wilson nodded. "Yeah. A lot of people do," He turned around only to have a huge-ass needle in his hand.

My eyes widened. Holy crap! Is he gonna put that in me?! I'm the type of person who cries when they get flu shots so let's just see how this works out… I started trembling so I closed my eyes. I started practically hyperventilating and he hadn't even stabbed me with it yet.

"Ok… just calm down," he said.

I opened my eyes. "I can't calm down if I know you're gonna put that in me!" I closed my eyes. "Don't tell me when you're gonna do it," I sat there, shaking with fear. "Don't do it yet. Don't do it yet!"

"I have to do it eventually!" he exclaimed.

I nodded. "Ok… fine," I closed my eyes and faced my doom. "OW! MOTHER FUCKER!" I screamed loud enough so that people in China could probably hear me. "HELP ME! HELP ME!!" I started crying and screaming at the same time. Finally, he took the goddamn thing out of me and I stopped screaming.

I caught my breath and then opened my eyes. "You are so going on my 'to die' list," I told him.

He shrugged. I closed my eyes again. My uncle came in the room. "Well I could certainly hear you screaming from a mile away," he smirked and walked over to me.

I narrowed my eyes. "Not funny, Brownie. That hurt like a bitch. You don't want to get a rabies shot, trust me,"

Uncle Brown sat down in a chair. "Good news is, you're rabies free and you aren't gonna die. Bad news is, you have to get four more shots,"

"WHAT?!"


	18. Waffles and Kisses

12am3pm 1am4pm 2am5pm 3am6pm 4am7pm 5am8pm 6am9pm 7am10p m8am11 pm9am1 2am10am1am11am2am12pm3am1pm4am2pm5am3pm6am4pm7am5pm8am6

**A\N: Here's the Smitchie chapter you all wanted! **

**Camp Rock**

**Chapter 18**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

Uncle Brown had to go back to the camp (him being the director and all) and so Tess and I had to go with him. Apparently, we have to come back once a week for a month to get another shot. Trust me, I put up a fight and cried, but those doctor people are really persuasive! But they told me the other four aren't bad as the first one, and of course, I don't believe them. I mean, they're on my 'to die' list and you can't trust those people. Just like you can't trust George Bush. (He's number one on my list.)

Everyone had to go back to the camp with cabins because there was a risk of more campers getting rabies, so I walked into my cabin; Jason and Nate were there. Jason ran over to me and hugged me. "I'm so glad you're ok! I thought you died!"

I pushed him away. "No. I'm fine," I grumbled and sat on my bed. My arm still hurt like a bitch.

Nate sat on the bed next to me. "Do you want me to get you anything?"

"Waffles would be nice," I said and put my head on the pillow.

"It's nighttime… There are no waffles at night," he told me.

"Well go make some!" I barked.

He got up from my bed. "I'll go see if Mitchie's mum will make some for you," Nate set off.

Jason sat down on my bed. "That was really smart of you to give The Bitch rabies,"

I nodded. "I know. I think we're even now," I said.

"Aww but we were having so much fun being mean to her!"

I let out a huff of laughter. "Yeah, it was fun, but I want to apologize and make all this hate stop,"

Jason rolled his eyes. "Whatever,"

Nate came back carrying a plate of two waffles. They had chocolate chips and whipped cream on them. I held out my hand and he gave the plate to me. I ate my waffley-goodness quickly and shoved the plate back at him. He threw it away (it was plastic.)

Mitchie knocked on the door. "Shane?"

"Come in," I called out.

She opened the door and ran inside. "Oh my God, I'm so glad you're ok!" She ran over to me and then did the weirdest thing ever…

She kissed me. On the lips. Like she freaking made out with me.

When she pulled away I was speechless. Why the hell did she kiss me? My jaw dropped and her face turned bright red. Mitchie hesitated a bit and then ran out of my cabin.

Jason and Nate looked at me. Nate started laughing. "Wow, Shane,"

I was still speechless. She just kissed me… she kissed me! It makes no sense! Why would she kiss me?! I stood up and ran after her. "Mitchie!" I called out. I ran out of my cabin and caught up with her.

She turned around. "Shane, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, honestly. I don't know what happened, I really don't,"

I shook my head. "No, no. It's ok. Really. It was… kind of nice," I gasped at what I just said. "Fuck! I'm in love with you!"

"Fuck! Me too!" she exclaimed. Mitchie pulled at her hair. "Damn it, what are we gonna do?"

"I don't know!" I cried. I exhaled, calming myself. "Ok. This is bad – very bad. Umm, maybe we should… date? Could that work?"

She nodded. "Yeah. We could do that," She kissed me again.

"Yeah. That's what couples do," I said and kissed her. "See, we can do this. This is good."

We made out in front of my cabin for a few seconds, but Tess interrupted us. "Ew. Get a room," she complained.

I turned to Tess. "Hi, Tess. Listen, this is going to be hard for me to say… but, uh. I'm… I'm…"

She looked annoyed. "Yes?"

"I'm… uh… I'm… I'm sorry. For everything. Especially the rabies and your hair and everything. I wanted to apologize and make this war stop," I said, looking down at the ground.

Tess suddenly looked… nice? "I'm sorry too," she stared into my eyes. "The truth is – I'm in love with you," Then _she_ kissed me.

Mitchie gasped. "You cheating bastard! And we were only together for two minutes, too!" She slapped me across the face and stormed off.

"Mitchie! Wait! I can explain!" I called out after her. I turned to Tess. "I can't believe you just did that!"

Tess grabbed my arm. "You don't need her. Be with me. I'll love you more than she ever will!"

I pulled my arm away from her. "No! I don't like you like I like Mitchie!" Whoa, I said like a lot in that last sentence.

"But Shane, we were meant to be! I read it in Tiger Beat magazine!"

I shook my head. "People like you and people like me weren't meant to be. I'm sorry Tess, really,"

I ran over to Mitchie. "Mitchie, I don't love her. Kissing Tess wasn't my idea,"

She scoffed and crossed her arms.

I sighed. "Seriously. That was not my intention. I love _you_. Not Tess,"

Mitchie smiled. "You love _me_?"

"Psh! Of course I do!" I said and hugged her. "She kissed me, I didn't kiss her,"

She let out a huff of laughter. "I guess you're right. Sorry I overreacted,"

"It's ok, Darling," I said.

Mitchie's smile grew. "You called me Darling! We have couple nicknames! All right, um, Sugarplum!" She hugged me again.

I smiled. "Now that we have this settled, I'm going to bed, because getting stabbed with a giant needle really takes the life out of you,"

"It really hurt, eh?"

"Oh yeah. You do not want to get rabies,"

She nodded. "Ok, I won't. Good night, Sugarplum. I'm glad you didn't die,"

"I'm glad I didn't die too. Good night, Darling," I said and walked into my cabin. Jason and Nate were sitting on their bed.

Nate looked up at me. "Someone looks like they're in love,"

"Shut up," I laughed and lay down in my bed.

"So are you guys a couple now?" Nate asked.

I smiled. "Yup." I sighed happily and closed my eyes. So this is what it feels like to be in love.


	19. Bright and Shiny

**A\N: Holy shit! Do I seriously have more than 400 reviews?! Ah-mazing. You know what I've always wanted to do? Jump on a stage with a microphone infront of a crap load of people and say, "My name's Claire! How y'all doin'?!" And then everyone would scream and cheer and I'd do something cool like jump into the crowd... On with the story!  
**

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 19**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I woke up with a satisfied sigh. "Good morning, world!" I exclaimed, stretching. It was only a couple minutes past eight and usually I would so not be up this morning, but today was different.

Nate gave me a confused look. "What are you doing up so early?"

I shrugged. "Carpe Diem, Nate, seize the fucking day," I said and got dressed.

Jason stared at me. "You're too happy… Did they like give you too much morphine or something?"

"Actually, I got no drugs whatsoever. Which made it all the worse, but I'm past that now!" I said happily.

Nate turned to Jason. "I don't like bright and shiny Shane; I prefer dark and twisty Shane. The new Shane is kind of freaking me out,"

I put my arm around my two band members. "I love you guys. God bless ya,"

"Who are you? Miley Cyrus?" Nate asked. "Last time I checked, you didn't believe in God,"

I let out a huff of laughter. "Today the grass is greener and the sky is bluer," I turned to the door. "Now if you excuse me, I'm going for a little morning jog,"

"You jog? Since when do you get exercise?" Nate asked.

I laughed again. "Carpe Diem, boys, Carpe Diem," I said and walked out the door. I had my tennis shoes on and some not-ridiculously-tight jeans on. Life is good. That's my new motto. Hey, I have a motto! Sweet. I jogged over to Uncle Brown's cabin. "Hey Brownie, care to go jogging with me?" I asked my uncle.

He gave me a weird look. "What are you doing up so early?"

"Today I'm Bright and Shiny Shane," I said and left his cabin.

"Well you have fun with that!" he called out after me. I went over to Mitchie's cabin. I went up to her and kissed her sweetly on the cheek.

"Hey Liefje," I said.

She laughed. "Liefje?"

I nodded. "Yeah. It's Dutch for 'little darling,'"

Mitchie laughed again. "Ok then. So you up for our first breakfast as a couple?"

"Totally," I smiled and held out my arm. She smiled and rested her arm on mine as if we were going to some fancy ball or something. We went to the dining hall and sat at our usual table.

Tess came over to us. "Hi Shane, hi Mitchie," she greeted warmly.

"Hello, hello, hello!" I smiled. "You're still working in the kitchen, eh? Well now that we're friends, I think I can get you off the hook," I told her.

She smiled. "Thanks, Shane! So, uh, I baked some chocolate chip muffins. Want one?"

I nodded. "Yes, please,"

Tess smiled and set off back into the kitchen.

Mitchie turned to me. "Friends, eh? So, we're done fighting? No more Bitch?"

I shook my head. "Nope. We're like best friends now. Carpe Diem, Liefje, Carpe Diem,"

She giggled. "What does Carpe Diem mean?"

"Seize the day," I told her.

Jason and Nate came into the dining hall. I waved to them. "Over here, guys!" I said. They sat down across from me.

"Hey," Nate said.

Jason turned to Mitchie. "Is he still all 'Carpe Diem' on our asses?"

I nodded. "Oh yeah. Learn to love life, Jason."

Mitchie laughed a bit. "Well aren't we just a ray of fucking sunshine?"

"Yes we are, Mitchie, yes we are," I smiled.

Tess came back with a chocolate chip muffin. She smiled and set it down on the table.

"Why thank you, Tess," I said and picked up the muffin, unwrapping it. "You know, you really are nice. I don't know why I ever thought you were such a bitch,"

Nate rolled his eyes. "Cause she broke your arm,"

I glanced at Nate. "We're past that now. Forgive and forget," I bit into my muffin. Man, it was good. Food tastes better when you're bright and shiny.

Suddenly, I felt my throat swell up. I gasped for air put the muffin down on the table. I coughed and struggled for breath.

Mitchie suddenly looked worried. "What's wrong baby?"

Nate and Jason looked at me. "Are you ok?" Nate asked.

I coughed some more as breathing was getting harder and harder by the second. I grabbed the muffin and looked at it. There were nuts in it! I'm allergic to nuts! My breathing became labored and I collapsed on the floor. Everyone gasped. Mitchie kneeled down next to me. "What's happening?" she asked frantically.

I pointed to the muffin and tried to make out words, but I couldn't.

Nate looked at the muffin. "Fuck! Shane's allergic to nuts,"

Then, it hit me. Tess did this to me! What a fucking bitch! She purposely put nuts in my muffin because she had my allergy list and KNEW I was allergic!

"Help! Somebody! Help!" Mitchie yelled.

Uncle Brown came running over to us. "What's wrong with Shane?" he asked, kneeling down next to me and lifting me up from the ground. I was still gasping and I was probably turning blue.

Nate pointed to the muffin. "There were nuts in that muffin and Shane ate it,"

"Oh, fuck!" Uncle Brownie swore. He turned to Nate. "Go get the nurse and tell her Shane's having an allergic reaction," Nate nodded and ran as fast as he could out of the dining hall.

I still was on the floor, trying desperately to breath. Mitchie was crying. "Please don't die, Shane! You can't die!"

I shook my head. No body's dying. Not me at least. Tess is a maybe. Erm, actually a probably. Wait until I get my hands on that bitch! She'll wish she'd never been born!

Then, the nurse came running into the dining hall and injected me with something and I could suddenly breathe again. I gasped and caught my breath.

Mitchie hugged me. "Oh my God, you scared the shit out of me, Shane! Don't ever almost die again!"

Uncle Brown let out a sigh of relief and helped me back up to my feet. I stood up and then screamed, "FUCKING BITCH!"

My uncle turned to me. "Who's a fucking bitch?"

I pointed to Tess who was peeking out from behind the kitchen doors. "That's the fucking bitch,"

He looked at her and then turned back to me. "Tess did this to you?"

"Yeah! She was being all nice and whatnot. And just to think, I was bright and shiny for one day of my life!" I yelled.

Uncle Brown sighed. "I know. You were actually happy for once," He turned to Tess. "TESS TYLER!" He boomed.

She shyly came out from the kitchen and slowly walked over to us. "Yes?" she asked.

My uncle sighed. "Did you put nuts in Shane's muffin?"

Tess bit her lip and looked down at the ground.

"I take that as a yes," Uncle Brown said. "What am I gonna do with you, Tess? I mean it's one thing to pull a prank, but you could have killed Shane!"

She scoffed. "He could have killed me when he gave me rabies!"

He sighed. "Fine then. You're even for now. However, no more life-threatening pranks, ok? I don't want to ban you guys from camp,"

Tess and I both sighed. "Yes Brown," we said at the same time.

Uncle Brown nodded. "Good. Now behave, children. Be nice to each other. Embrace the love," he walked back to his table.

Right as he was out of view, I turned to Tess. "I hate you,"

"I hate you too," she countered.

"So much for me being bright and shiny," I muttered. "Oh and by the way, I take that back about you being nice. And I take back my apology. You're the biggest bitch ever,"

Now I'm back to being dark and twisty… and kicking some serious ass.

**A\N: Last night, I had a dream that I was just walking down my street and then the JB tour bus comes up and Kevin comes out and grabs me and hog ties me and then shoves me in a closet in their tour bus with Nick... Is that weird or what?! And then he and Joe threw a party and said, "Happy You Just Got Kidnapped By Kevin Jonas Day!" **

OH, and uh, **review** please!


	20. Dark and Twisty

Camp Revenge

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 20**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

I. Am. Dark. And. Twisty. Today at least. Well, actually every day. No more bright and shiny for me. I will forever be dark and twisty Shane. If there was one thing that I learned today, it's that you can never trust anyone. Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid. Unless they prove themselves trustworthy. It's like trusting for the untrustworthy – it just doesn't work. Especially if they are on the top of your "to die" list. Oh, and The Bitch has been promoted to number one on my "to die" list. Yes, even George Bush didn't try to kill me with a death muffin, so he's second on my list now.

Mitchie hugged me. "Shane, I'm just so glad you're alive!"

Yeah, I'm happy too.

Nate joined in the hug and so did Jason.

"Yay. Group hug!" Jason exclaimed and squeezed me to death.

I pushed them away. "Ok! Stop! I can't breathe again!"

They pulled away from our death hug and then I walked out of the dining hall. Mitchie came after me. "Wait! Shane! Where are you going?"

I turned to face her. "Can you just leave me alone? I want to be dark and twisty!" I walked faster out of the dining hall and went into my cabin, slamming the door. I leaned up against the door and then slid down, sitting on the ground. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing.

Mitchie knocked on my door. "Shane? Are you in there?"

I didn't answer.

"Shane? Please? Open the door," she begged.

Still no answer.

"Please don't be dark and twisty," Mitchie said, her voice filled with sorrow.

Silence.

"But Shane… The dance is next week," she sounded heart broken.

What dance? I stood up and opened the door. Mitchie half smiled and came into my cabin.

I faced Mitchie. "What dance are we talking about?"

Mitchie smiled. "The promette!"

The what now?

"You know, it's like the prom, only for kids our age,"

"A promette, eh?"

"Yeah! It's like the best thing of the year!"

"I don't remember a promette when I went to camp here,"

"That's because it started last year. Everyone brings fancy clothes from home and then you wear it to the promette! It's really fun!"

"I didn't get the memo,"

"You didn't read the pamphlet,"

"Damn right I didn't,"

She sighed. "So you don't have fancy attire?"

"Umm… no. And even if I did, why would I wear it to a stupid camp dance?"

"Because it's what you do!"

I shook my head. "No. No dance for me. That's such a stupid thing. A promette? How lame! And besides, I'm dark and twisty," I lay down on my bed.

Mitchie scoffed. "Fine! I'll go with someone else!"

She left my cabin and slammed the door. I sighed. Being dark and twisty is not fun. I closed my eyes and tried to go back to sleep.

But I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking about how hurt Mitchie looked when I told her I didn't want to go to the promette with her. I sighed, realizing I had to do the right thing, and I went out of my cabin and saw Mitchie sitting down on a rock by the lake. I smiled as I went up to her. "Hey, Mitchie,"

"What?" she barked.

I got down on one knee. "Will you go to the prom with me,"

She looked disgusted. "No, Shane, no. I don't want to go to the prom with you," Mitchie got up and left.

I watched as she left. I ran after her. "Wait! Mitchie! I'm sorry! I want to go to the prom with you! Please?"

She sighed. "Sorry Shane. I'm already going with someone else,"

"Who?" I asked.

"Denny,"

"Who's Denny?"

"My brother!" she yelled. "I have to go to the prom with my brother because my boyfriend didn't want to go with me!"

I pouted. "I'm sorry, Mitchie. Please-"

She stopped me. "No! Just don't even talk! This prom meant a lot to me and then you tell me that you don't want to go? My BOYFRIEND doesn't want to take me to prom?! I have to go with my BROTHER?!"

"Mitchie, come on. Don't be like this," I said.

Mitchie scoffed. "No! We are so over!" she yelled and walked away. I was left standing there by the lake, my jaw dropped.

Damn it. I just got dumped. All because I wanted to be dark and twisty...


	21. Denny

Camp Revenge

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 21**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

I stood there in a silent shock and watched my ex-girlfriend walk away from me. Mitchie went over to some other guy – I'm guessing Denny – and hugged him. She looked like she was crying and Denny wiped away her tears.

I was crushed. I just got dumped. The one girl whom I actually loved just dumped me. All because I didn't want to go to a stupid prom! I sighed. Damn it. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Just my luck, eh? I sighed and walked over to Mitchie. "Mitchie…" I started.

Mitchie turned to me. I wiped away one of her tears. "Go away, Shane. I don't want to talk to you," She slapped away my hand.

I sighed. "I'm really sorry, Mitchie. Really. I didn't mean to be so mean. I didn't know you actually cared about some retarded prom," Oh shit. That did not sound right.

She scoffed. "You're such an ass!" She grabbed Denny's arm and pulled him away from me. She stormed away and went into her cabin.

I stood there for a second and then went into my own cabin. Jason and Nate were sitting there. They looked up at me. "I just got dumped," I muttered and sat down on my bed.

Nate walked over to me. "It's ok man, you can always find another girl,"

"Yeah. I could," I sighed.

"There are plenty of fish in the ocean, Shane! You just gotta get out there and find one that won't dump you!" Nate encouraged and pulled me up to my feet. "So who are some pretty hot girls that you like?"

I shrugged. "I dunno. There was one girl-"

"Name?" Nate commanded.

"Uh… Anastasia," I said.

Nate raised his eyebrows. "Is she a blonde?"

I shook my head. "No. Brunette,"

He nodded. "Fine. Fine. Get a brunette. They aren't really your type though,"

I shrugged. "Mitchie's a brunette,"

"Exactly my point! You just got dumped by someone with brown hair! Pick a blonde. Any blonde. Who's the first blonde that comes to mind,"

"Tess," I replied. Oh, God.

Nate bit his lip. "Know any other blondes?"

I shook my head. "None that I like… Oh damn it! Did I just say that I liked Tess in a weird implied way?!"

He gasped. "Yeah! You did!" Suddenly, he smirked. "I know how you could get back at Mitchie,"

"What?" I asked.

"Well I mean, she just broke up with you so you must be really mad," I nodded. I am. "So if you hook up with someone that Mitchie hates then you could make her jealous! She'll see you at the prom with Tess and then she'll come crawling back to you, begging to get back together,"

"What a great idea!" I exclaimed. "But wait. Tess tried to kill me,"

He shrugged. "That makes it all the better,"

This is very confusing. How is this gonna work?

"Trust me – it will work," Nate said. "Now go out there and ask Tess to the prom!" He looked at Jason. "In the meantime, we'll be here finding dates of our own,"

"I'm confuzzled," I said.

Nate rolled his eyes. "Just do it!"

I shrugged. "Ok," I said and left the cabin. I walked over to Tess's cabin and knocked on her door. She opened the door and then scoffed.

"If you're here to get back at me, go ahead," she said.

I shook my head. "No. It's not that. I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the prom with me," I said.

Tess smiled excitedly. "Seriously?!" Then he face dropped. "You're just kidding, right? You just want to get back at me?"

I shook my head again. "No. I'm serious,"

"But aren't you dating Mitchie?"

"We, uh, broke up," I said, kicking a stray rock.

She gasped happily and then hugged me. "Yay! I knew you would always chose the right person!"

I laughed a bit. "Yeah. Well. Um. See you later," I said and turned away.

Tess grabbed my shoulder and turned me back around. "Shane, really, I'm sorry for almost killing you,"

"Sorry for almost killing you, too," I said and walked back to my cabin. Jason and Nate were sitting in a circle with two other people – Denny and Mitchie. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw them and they all turned to me. "I'm sorry… I'll just go now," I said and turned around.

Mitchie stopped me. "No. Wait," she said.

I turned back around.

She sighed. "I don't want to hate you, Shane,"

I raised my eyebrows and sat down in the circle with them. "So we're still friends?"

Mitchie let out a huff of laughter. "Just friends,"

"Good," I said. "Now we don't have to worry about breaking up again,"

She nodded. "I guess we just weren't meant to be,"

I laughed. "Yeah. Someone once told me that brunettes weren't my type," I looked at Nate and he started laughing as well.

Denny smiled. "Well I'd like to introduce myself – I'm Denny, Mitchie's brother,"

"Hi Denny," I said. This Denny guy seems nice.

He stood up. "Want to go do something fun?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah," Who said new friends were a bad thing? I stood up and so did everyone else. We walked out of my cabin. We walked down to the lake and on the way, saw my uncle.

"Hey Uncle Brownie," I said. "We were just off to go hang out by the lake,"

Uncle Brown turned to me. "You made friends?"

I shrugged. "I guess so,"

"So are we back to being bright and shiny?" he asked.

I shrugged again. "Not really sure. I guess I'm on the border of dark and twisty,"

He smiled. "Good. I like bright and shiny Shane better than the dark and twisty one,"

I laughed. "I bet you do," Then, I looked over at my friends. They were already down by the lake, splashing around. I smiled and walked after them. Mitchie was sitting down on the beach. I went over to her and sat down with her.

Mitchie turned to me. "Hey," she said.

"Hi," I replied and watched as Jason, Nate, and Denny swam in the lake. Denny and Jason got into a wrestling match and they were dragging each other under the water.

Jason surfaced and gasped for air. He pulled Denny down under the murky water and Denny started splashing around and then hit Jason, and Jason fell over and made a splash. He got back up and pulled Denny down again. They both started laughing when Nate tried to drag Jason under the water, and Jason picked Nate up and threw him. Nate screamed and splashed into the lake a few feet away.

I laughed, watching the three fight. Mitchie was laughing with me.

Denny got out of the water and sat down next to me. "Your band members are weaklings," he said with a smirk.

I laughed again. "Yeah. They are. Jason's an idiot and Nate has like no balls,"

Denny smiled. "I'd like to see you fight,"

I held up my arm. "Can't. I broke my arm,"

He smirked. "Yeah. You are pretty weak,"

I scoffed. "Excuse me?!"

Denny shrugged. "You fell off a stage. I saw,"

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, man. Did I ever tell you the time that Nate, Jason, and I were bike riding and Nate fell over into the grass when he was going like two miles and hour and broke his arm?"

He laughed hysterically. "In the grass?!"

I nodded. "Yeah,"

"Wow," he laughed.

I laughed too. "I know,"

This Denny guy is the shit! I can't believe I actually made a friend… Wow. What has happened to me? What has this world come to? When Shane Gray makes friends that means something weird is happening… a full moon, possibly?


	22. Ghost Stories

**A\N: Guys, I'm gonna cry. You make my day everyday! Every time I log on my computer and check my email it says "48 unread messages" and it makes me so happy and warm and fuzzy inside to know that you care about me enough to review! My goal is to get over 1,000 reviews - that'd be pretty cool, eh? I love you guys! I couldn't have done it without you! Well, I could have, but it would have been really lame!  
**

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 22**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

Denny and I have been hanging out no stop for the past five days. He's been sleeping over at our cabin and we even had a dance party last night! Denny is probably the best friend I've ever had in a long time. Jason and Nate are still my best friends, but Denny is definitely tied for first with them.

"Let's make s'mores!" Denny suggested.

I laughed. "Yeah!"

We ran out of my cabin and bumped into Jason and Nate. They were already sitting by the campfire. "Hey," I greeted. "Denny and I are gonna make some s'mores. Care to join?"

They shrugged. "Sure," they said at the same time.

We walked into the kitchen and saw Tess there. Tess ran up to me and gave me a big hug. "I missed you, sweetie!"

I awkwardly hugged her too and patted her on the back. "Me too," I lied. I don't actually like Tess, it's all to make Mitchie jealous, remember?

When we pulled away from our awkward hug, I asked, "Hey can you get us some s'mores stuff,"

She nodded and kissed me sweetly on the cheek. When she set off into the back of the kitchen, I rubbed my cheek, getting the lipstick off. Denny tried his hardest not to laugh. I glanced at him, causing him to cough and mess with his shaggy hair.

Tess – my "girlfriend" – came back with some gram crackers, marshmallows, and chocolate. She handed the stuff to me and then said, "Make me a s'mores, kay?"

I nodded and then we set off. We went back to the campfire, s'mores stuff in hand, and then we each grabbed sticks, putting the marshmallows on them.

While I put my above the fire, Denny put his _in_ the fire, and the whole thing went up in flames. He laughed and then pulled it out of the fire, still flaming, and waved it at me. I laughed and stepped back, away from the burnt fluffy goodness. Denny blew out the fire on his marshmallow and he started to peel off the burn part. "See, it's only good when you get all that gooey ness on the inside," he explained and put the marshmallow on the gram cracker.

I shrugged and set mine on fire as well, peeling off the burnt part. I ate my s'mores and it was the best s'mores I had ever had in my life!

"You must go camping a lot," I said, mouth full of s'mores.

Denny nodded. "I used to go a lot, but then when I got a heart transplant, I couldn't really go as much as I would have liked,"

"Oh," I replied. "What happened…?" I asked. It was kind of awkward asking my friend why he had a heart transplant, but my curiosity got the better of me.

He shrugged. "I dunno. My heart decided it was gonna be a bitch one day and just gave out,"

"Oh," I said again, taking another bite of my s'mores. "So are you ok now?" Oh my God. I'm actually _caring_ for another human being. I never thought I'd live to see the day…

Denny nodded. "Yeah. I guess," he looked down at his s'mores. "I still have some problems some times, but for the most part I guess I'm fine,"

We sat there in silence for a couple of minutes. "Oh shit," I said, standing up. "I have to make Tess a s'mores!" I fumbled around for the bag of marshmallows.

"Here, I'll do it," Denny offered and grabbed the bag. He put a marshmallow on a stick and caught it on fire.

I smiled. "Thanks, Denny,"

He turned to me. "No problem. Making s'mores is fun anyway,"

When he finished making the s'mores he gave it to me and I put it on a plate, and then went back to the kitchen. Tess ran up to me and grabbed the plate and gave me a hug. "Thank you, sweetie!"

Tess bit into the s'mores. "Mmm! You make the best s'mores ever!"

I laughed. "You're welcome," I said and went out of the kitchen. I went back to the campfire and everyone was singing campfire songs. Jason was playing his guitar with Nate and everyone was singing. I sat down in between Jason and Nate and sang with them.

After the song was over, everyone started going back to his or her cabins. I turned to Denny. "Sleepover?" I asked.

Denny nodded and stood up. We high-fived. "Yeah!" we exclaimed at the same time.

Mitchie laughed. "You boys have fun," she said and headed off to her own cabin.

Jason, Nate, Denny, and I all headed off to my cabin. I turned on the stereo and blasted some Paramore music. We all jumped around and laughed.

Uncle Brown came into my cabin. "TURN THE GODDAMN MUSIC OFF!" he yelled over the volume.

I turned the stereo off and gave my uncle a death glare. "Way to be a party-pooper," I mumbled.

"Go to bed. It's well past midnight," my uncle commanded and left the cabin.

I scoffed. "Asshole,"

Denny shrugged. "Just do what he says and then we can party in the morning,"

"Fine," I said and got in my bed. Jason, Nate, and Denny got in their sleeping bags. "Goodnight, everyone," I said.

X X X

The next morning when I woke up, I was showered with kisses. From Tess. Bitch kisses. "Wake up, sleepy head," she said.

I mumbled something and then flipped over. "Too early," I said into my pillow.

She sighed. "Wake up. It's past three,"

I groaned and turned back around, opening my eyes. Denny, Jason, and Nate weren't in the cabin. "Where'd they go?" I asked.

Tess shrugged. "Down to the creek,"

I got out of bed and stretched. I completely ignored Tess and went out of my cabin. Tess followed me, but I pretended like she wasn't there. I went into the forest, following the dirt path, and saw Mitchie, Denny, Jason, and Nate moving rocks into the river. "What are you doing?" I asked, approaching them.

Denny turned around. "We're making a rock bridge to cross the creek," he said and continued putting large rocks in the creek.

I decided to help and after a while, we got rocks all the way across the creek. Jason and Nate went first, followed my Denny and I. Mitchie stayed at the other end. When Denny crossed to the other side of the creek, he turned around. "You coming, Mitchie?" he asked.

She shook her head. "I'm scared,"

Denny went back to the other side of the creek and said, "Piggy back ride,"

Mitchie smiled and hopped on his back. Denny crossed the creek and then let Mitchie off on the other side. When everyone was on the same side of the creek, we walked up stream. We ended up going into the forest and looking around for a while.

When we made it to a clear opening, we stopped to take a rest. There were some conveniently places logs sitting around in a circle so we all sat down.

"Let's tell some ghost stories," Denny suggested. "I have a good one,"

Mitchie laughed. "Is it that stupid one about the old man in Colorado, again?"

Denny shrugged. "I dunno. Is it?"

"Just tell it," I urged.

He laughed. "Ok. So, one day in this town called South Park in Colorado, there lived an old man. He would sit out on his porch on Front Street and his rocking chair would creak back and forth. _Eeep_, _eep_. Everyone would come up to him and ask him why he was holding a gun, but no reply came from the old man. He would just rock back and forth. Back and forth. The old man would sit out there all day and night and wouldn't talk to a living soul – that's because he only talked to dead people,"

By now, Jason, Nate, and I were huddled up together, shivering and whimpering. It was only midday but being out in the woods had an eerie feeling to it.

Denny continued his story. "So every night at midnight the man would get up from his rocking chair and go into the hotel across the street. He would walk through the door and the wind chimes would go off as he walked by. The old man would walk to the back of the hotel and would pass by the night manager. The night manager would stop him and say,

"'Sir, why do you come here every night?'

"But the man gave no reply. He would go out the back door and down to the lake. He would sit down by the lake, then all of his ghost friends would come out from the forest, and then they would go and murder people.

"Every night, a different person would be killed, leaving the town speechless. Soon, he killed everyone in the town. When the whole town people turned to ghosts, he would sit on his rocking chair and rock back and forth. Back and forth,"

Jason started crying. "No! I don't want to die!"

I punched him. "It's not real, Jason," I turned to Denny. "It's just a story, right?"

Denny nodded. "Yeah. But do you want to know a real ghost story?"

Mitchie suddenly looked spooked. "No. Not the one about our house. Please don't say it!"

Denny smirked. "I'm sure our friends would love to hear it,"

Nate, Jason, and I nodded.

Mitchie covered her ears. "This one always gives me nightmares! And it's true, also!"

"Tell it! Tell it!" I urged.

Denny told the story. "So Mitchie and I used to live in a town called South Park in Colorado,"

"Wait," I stopped him. "Isn't that where the other story took place?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Same place. Same ghost,"

"So it was true?!" I screeched.

Denny shrugged. "I guess. You decide after this story," He continued. "Ok, so we lived in this house right by the hotel that the old man would go though every night and there would always be weird things going on – lights would flicker, there would be weird noises at night, sometimes random twinkling lights would be seen,"

Mitchie was in a fetal position, covering her ears and making weird noises, trying not to listen to the story.

"So one day when I was five and Mitchie was just a baby, I heard her crying so I went into her room and saw a blue figure rocking her back and forth. I said, 'Who are you? What do you want?' And then the ghost turned to me and said,

"'I am the true mother of this baby,' and then she quickly floated away but I chased after her.

"'Leave our family alone!' I yelled at the ghost and then screamed for my parents. They came rushing into the room and then the ghost suddenly disappeared and Mitchie was back safe in her crib. It was the scariest thing that had ever happened to our family," he told the story.

I was shivering. "And that's true?" I asked, shaking.

Denny nodded. "That one is true. I saw the ghost with my very own two eyes. And it wasn't a dream because my parents remember it, too,"

Jason and Nate started trembling.

Mitchie uncovered her ears. "Are you done telling the story?"

Denny nodded. "Yeah. It scared the crap out of our friends,"

"That's because it's a freaky story!" Mitchie exclaimed.

Denny laughed. "It is pretty scary, eh? It's even creepier cause it's one hundred percent true,"

We all nodded.

I looked around. "Yeah, can we go back to camp now? I'm kind of scared,"

We all stood up and quickly walked back to camp. We followed a long the creek. When it came time to cross the creek, Denny carried Mitchie across the creek and we ran back to camp. The sun was now setting and we were totally freaked out. We all went back to Mitchie's cabin and talked about less scary things – like video games and guitars.

Around eight, we all went to the dining hall and ate dinner. We had pizza! Yay! I had totally forgotten all about the scary story until nightfall and it was dark out.

Right before we went to bed, Denny was about to turn off the lights, but I stopped him. "Umm, can we leave the lights on tonight?"

Denny laughed. "Get over it. We're not in that house, remember?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I guess," I said and reached under my bed, grabbing my teddy bear.

He laughed again and then turned off the lights.

**A\N: That story that Denny told about the ghost in their house is actually true believe it or not! I still have nightmares about it! I actually lived next to the haunted hotel where that old man ghost would go through every night. Creepy, eh? Actually as I'm writing this chapter, I'm next to my old house! Eeep! Wonder why we moved?**

More than 500 reviews, eh? Wow. Only half way there...


	23. Rabies Shots and Shopping

**A\N: Let's play a game, eh? Who can count how many times I say 'eh' in every one of my chapters. Author notes included. Winner gets a cookie! Fun, eh? See, there I go again!**

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 23**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

"Shane, wake up. We gotta go," Uncle Brown was shaking my shoulder.

I yawned, my eyes still closed and mumbled, "Go where?"

"You have to get your second rabies shot,"

I sighed. "Damn it," I cursed and slowly got out of bed. I dragged my feet across the floor and changed into some other clothes.

Denny looked up at me. "Where are you going?"

I sighed again. "I'm off to be tortured. See you later,"

Jason and Nate were still asleep. Lucky bastards. I wish I were still sleeping. For God's sake, it's like seven in the morning. I groaned and followed my uncle out of the cabin. We went into Tess's cabin and she cheerfully got out of bed and hugged me. "Sweetie!" she screeched.

Uncle Brown looked at me and mouthed, "You're dating?"

I nodded.

We went into Uncle Brown's car and he drove us to the same hospital. Luckily, I got a different doctor this time, his name was Dr. Smith. Original, eh? I closed my eyes and I got my second shot, which wasn't as bad as the first but I still cried, mind you.

Uncle Brown came into the room, holding a brown paper bag. "Here – I got you some more crack rock,"

"Crack rock?" I asked as I took the bag from him. I looked inside the bag and pulled out a blue stick of rock candy. "Don't you mean 'rock candy'?"

He rolled his eyes. "Same thing,"

I shook my head. "Not the same thing," I ate my so-called crack rock and then we met up with Tess in the lobby. We went back into my uncle's car and started driving. When we took a different turn, the other way from camp, I began to wonder where we were going. "Camp's to the left, you artard," I said.

Uncle Brown shook his head. "We aren't going back to camp right now,"

"Then where are we going?" I asked.

Tess to turned to me, a smile across her face. "Shopping!" she squealed.

I groaned and closed my eyes. "Not shopping. Haven't I been tortured enough today?"

"We're going shopping for the promette outfits!" she said, excitedly.

"Outfits, eh?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah. I'm getting a dress and you're getting a tux,"

I groaned again. Will this nightmare never end? I opened my eyes. "And you agreed to go shopping, Brownie?" I asked.

"Yeah. Tess told me you didn't have a tux for the prom so we have to buy you something," he said.

"And," Tess started, "I don't like my dress. I need a better one,"

I scoffed. "You don't like your dress, eh? Wait, so you already have a dress? Didn't you show it to me? Didn't it have like real crystals on it?"

She shrugged. "Yeah. I don't like it,"

"Why not?" I asked. "It must have cost a fortune,"

Tess shrugged again. "So? I don't like it,"

"Then why'd you buy it?" I asked.

"Because I thought it was good at the time, but then I saw Taylor Swift wearing it and it became a definite no-no,"

"OH," I replied sarcastically. "I see now,"

We pulled up to "David's bridal store." I stared at it for a second. "A bridal store, eh? Who's getting married?"

Tess laughed. "We are!"

My jaw dropped. "What?!"

She laughed again. "Just kidding! No, I'm just getting a wedding dress,"

"Why are you getting a wedding dress if you're not getting married?" I asked.

Tess looked at me like I was a retard. "Do you have no brains, darling?"

I rolled my eyes and we all got out of the car. We walked into the store and Tess went over to the 'size zero' section. She pulled out a couple of wedding gowns and then went into the dressing room to try them on.

Uncle Brown and I sat down on the couch by the mirrors. I groaned and buried my head in my hands. "This is awful," I moaned.

Tess came out wearing one wedding gown that was strapless, was poofy, and had a long train.

"You're not getting married, Tess. This is a prom – no, not even a prom; a _promette_. Wear a fucking prom dress," I told her.

She scrunched up her face and then went back into the dressing room, trying on another wedding gown.

Tess came out wearing a dress that was strapless, skinny at the top, but then it poofed out and the bottom with feathers. She looked pretty hot, but she's still a bitch.

"You like?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yeah. Sure. Whatever. If I say yes then will we get out of here faster?" I asked.

She scoffed and went back into the dressing room and came back out wearing her regular clothes. Tess had the dress in her hand. "I'm getting this one,"

I stood up, put my hands in the air, and looked up. "Hallelujah!" I yelled.

We walked to the checkout counter and the lady took the dress from Tess. "Who's getting married?" she asked.

"No one," I mumbled.

"It's for our camp promette," Tess explained. "My boyfriend, Shane Gray, is taking me,"

The cashier lady turned to me. "THE Shane Gray?!"

Tess nodded. "Yeah,"

"Didn't you get rabies, Shane?" she asked.

I turned to Tess. "Can we go now?"

Tess gave the cashier her credit card, then we got the dress, and Tess held it in her lap as we drove.

"Finally. Back to camp," I sighed and leaned my head up against the window.

"Umm, no," Tess said.

I opened my eyes. "What?"

"Well we have to get you a tux now!" she exclaimed excitedly.

I groaned again and hit my head repeatedly on the window.

We got to a tuxedo place and Tess picked out a black tux for me. I tried it on and since it fit, Tess bought it for me and then we FINALLY went back to camp.

I went back into my cabin and plopped down on my bed. Denny looked at me. "Rough time, eh?"

"You said it," I mumbled to my pillow.

He sat down on the edge of my bed. "What happened? Where did you go?"

I looked up at him. "I got a fucking rabies shot and then I had to go shopping for wedding dresses!"

"Rabies shot? Oh yeah, you're the one who got rabies, eh?"

I nodded. "That would be me," I muttered.

"So why the hell did you go wedding dress shopping? Someone getting married?"

I scoffed. "No," I sat up. "But Tess thinks the promette is a wedding,"

He laughed. "Does she think you're getting married or something?"

I shrugged. "Maybe,"

Denny smirked. "She's weird,"

I nodded. "I know that,"

**A\N: There's a link to a picture of Tess's prom dress on my profile page. Tell me in your reviews how many 'eh's' you counted and if you win... Not only will you get a cookie, but I will email you the next chapter of this story and you can read it before anyone else. Cool, eh?**

**_AND IF YOU HAVEN'T VOTED FOR WHO YOU THINK SHOULD BE PROMETTE KING AND QUEEN, VOTE NOW!_ Poll on my profile page...**


	24. Tomorrow! Tomorrow!

**A\N: There were 11 in that last chapter! That's pretty sad, eh? Ok, I really gotta stop... Damn Canadian dad... FallennAngel won this game... I'll think of another game in the meantime ha ha. Thanks to everyone who guessed!  
**

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 24**

_My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view_

I woke up when Tess started singing. "Tomorrow! Tomorrow! The promette's tomorrow! Tomorrow's a day away!"

I groaned and put my pillow over my head. "Sleeping!" I muttered. She kept shaking me.

"Wake up, sweetie!" she said. "It's time for the promette rehearsal!"

I looked up at her. "Rehearsal, eh? For what, dare I ask?"

Tess let out a huff of laughter. "Silly, willy! We're doing a choreographed partner dance!"

I groaned and planted my face back into my pillow. "No. I refuse," I mumbled.

She pulled me – literally – out of bed and I landed on the floor with a thud. I groaned. "Fine. I'm up, I'm up!" I got back up to my feet and changed into some different clothes.

We went to the dancing hall and there was an instructor there, teaching us all the moves. I looked over and saw Mitchie and Denny dancing. They were both laughing and Denny spun her around.

I completely forgot about Tess until she slapped my wrist. "Pay attention!" she barked.

I turned away from my friends and practiced dancing with Tess. I had to pick her up and put her over my head and spin her around – I don't know how the hell I'm gonna do this is she's going to be wearing a wedding dress.

After an hour or so of dancing, Tess and I finally got all the moves down. I was having the worst time ever, while Mitchie and Denny looked like they were having a blast. They were both laughing and joking around. I actually got slightly jealous.

Tess grabbed my arm and we went into the dining hall. She got me some food and then I sat down at the table with her, Denny, Mitchie, Nate, and Jason. We all talked about the promette.

"So did you guys find a date yet?" I asked my band members.

Jason nodded. "Yeah. Her name's Anastasia,"

"The brunette chick?" I asked.

He smiled. "Yeah," He waved to a girl. "Over here, Annie!"

Anastasia came over to our table. She was tall and thin and was wearing black skinny jeans and a red tank top. "Hey," she said as she sat down.

I turned to Nate. "You got a date yet?"

He sighed and shook his head. "Sadly, no. I couldn't find the right girl. I guess I'll just have to go alone,"

Jason and Anastasia were making googly eyes at each other and – get this – fed each other – which I thought was really creepy, by the way.

Denny turned to Mitchie. "What dress did you bring?"

She smiled. "I actually brought three. I'm gonna have a hard time deciding,"

"Is it the blue one, the green one, or the pink one?" he asked.

Mitchie smirked. "You'll have to wait and see!"

Denny smiled and ate his food. I sighed as I thought about Tess's wedding dress… We're sure gonna stand out. Maybe that was her goal.

After we ate, Tess took me into her cabin saying that we had to 'rehearse.' "Rehearse what?" I asked her.

She laughed. "The kiss,"

"What kiss?" I asked.

Tess rolled her eyes. "Well we're obviously going to be promette king and queen and the king and queen ALWAYS have a kiss and dance together,"

"Is that why we rehearsed dancing? Because everyone's gonna see us dance when we win?"

"Now you're catching on!" she smiled. Then, she led me over to an open part in her cabin. "Now, let me set the scene for you: We're anxiously awaiting our names to be called. Your uncle Brown calls up every nominee's name and they go to the stage. So, we're standing there smiling and looking down at all the losers who weren't nominated and then Brownie says,

"'And the Camp Rock Two-thousand and eight promette king and queen are…'

"And then someone starts playing a drum roll and he opens the envelope and says, 'Shane Gray and Tess Tyler!'

"And Everyone's clapping and cheering, and I start crying and then we go over to your uncle and he put the crowns on us and then I say something like, 'Wow. I can't believe it. Wow. This is such an honor! I'm so glad you guys voted for me and Shane as king and queen! This is the best day of my life! I love you all!'

"And then we share a big kiss in front of everyone and they're all clapping and whistling and then we walk down from the stage, hand in hand, and the loser nominees smile at us and say 'Congratulations,' but you know deep down inside, they hate our guts,"

I nodded. "I see now,"

She walked over to me. "So now we have to practice our kiss,"

I stuttered and then slowly backed away. Right before Tess could kiss me, there were sirens. I turned my head away from her, causing her to smash her lips on the side of my head. "Do you hear that?" I asked.

Tess scoffed. "Who cares? Someone probably just died. It doesn't matter. Let's just rehearse our kiss," she said and leaned into me again.

I walked away from her. "I'm going to see what's up,"

I went out of the cabin. There was a ambulance. I saw Nate and so I walked up to him. "What's going on, eh?" I asked.

Nate was speechless.

Then, I saw Mitchie sitting over on a rock, crying her eyes out. I ran over to her. "Mitchie!"

She looked up at me, her eyes red from crying. She got up and hugged me.

"What's wrong, Mitchie?" I asked.

Mitchie pulled away form our hug and I wiped away some of her tears. "It's Denny, Shane. He's having heart problems again,"

X X X

Denny was rushed to the hospital and Uncle Brown, Mitchie, and I went with him. We were sitting in the waiting room, talking. Mitchie turned to my uncle. "How are we gonna have the promette now? Denny was my prom date, and we can't have the prom without him,"

My uncle sighed. "I don't know, Mitchie. We'll think of something,"

I turned to my uncle. "We can't have the promette without Denny," I protested.

"We'll see what we can do," my uncle muttered.

Mitchie looked over at me and then buried her face in her hands. I looked over at my uncle. He was staring off into space, looking really worried. Mitchie was softly crying. We were the only people in the waiting room.

A nurse came up to us. "Denny Torres's family?" she asked.

We all stood up, even though only Mitchie is family. The nurse led us into a room and Mitchie started crying when she saw her brother hooked up to all sorts of machines and whatnot.

I stayed by the door with my uncle, speechless. Mitchie hugged her brother gently.

Denny half smiled. "Hi, little sis,"

This just made Mitchie cry even harder.

"I'm ok now. Don't cry, Mitch," he comforted.

Mitchie wiped away her tears.

"Don't be sad Mitchie. We always find a way to survive everything," he said and Mitchie nodded.

"Hey," Denny whispered, "We can get through this. We always do,"

Mitchie started crying again. I walked over to Denny. "Hey, man," I said.

Denny looked at me. "Hi, Shane,"

When I didn't have anything to say – no words of comfort – I sat down in a chair, my uncle in the other one. I turned to my uncle. "So what are we going to do about the promette?"

He sighed. "We'll have to have the promette without Denny,"

"No!" I protested. "Denny has to be there for the promette!"

My uncle closed his eyes. "I'll think of something," Then, his eyes shot open and he stood up. "I have a plan," he said and rushed out of the room.

A plan, eh? This better be good.

**A\N: Look for my new story: "Superheroes" I just put up the trailer for it! It's gonna be a hilarious action movie in which Kevin can't feel pain, Joe can walk through walls, and "Nick can turn into a llama ha ha ha. Go read it please! And review! On both stories! I will love you forever! If you read my new story, I'll give you a cookie!  
**


	25. Planning

**A\N: So tomorrow's chapter will be the season finale... but never to fear! There WILL be a sequel! I've already written twenty chapters of it! (No, I don't have a life, you're right!)  
**

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 25**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

Best. Plan. Ever! Brownie convinced the hospital staff to let us hold the promette in the hospital! It was perfect because then we could go and visit Denny while we were partying! Mitchie was happy with the idea and so we got started immediately on planning. We even got some doctors (apparently they had gotten in trouble with their boss) to help us plan.

One of the doctors – his name was Alex - was being a real ass and was banging his head on the table. "No surgeries… no helping in the ER… and here I am planning some stupid prom for a bunch of stupid kids!"

"Hey," I barked. "It just so happens that our friend is in critical condition so you shut the fuck up and be a little nicer, ok? We want to make this special for him but we can't do it if you're gonna be like that!"

Mitchie was telling two of the doctors – Christina and Meredith - exactly what she wanted. "You know, I'm not really sure if we should have pink balloons, or red ones, or yellow ones… what do you think?"

Christina turned to the Meredith. "I didn't like teenaged girls when I was a teenaged girl. My mum forced me to go to prom and my date threw up on my dress,"

Meredith laughed. "I didn't go to prom. I was into the whole bad-ass teenager thing,"

Mitchie looked annoyed. "What color?" she asked. Then she turned to Alex the asshole. "What color do you think?"

Alex groaned with his head down on the table. The other doctor – George- looked at him. "Are you having a seizure?"

He looked up. "Fine. Let's go with seizure! Having a seizure sure beats the hell out of doing this!"

George stood up from his chair. "I'll go ask our boss what she thinks,"

Then, a short doctor came in. "What's wrong with you people?" she asked.

Alex looked at her. "It's the color of the balloons, Dr. Bailey. They should be red, no they should be green, no they should be a freaking rainbow!"

She sighed. "Silver and black,"

Mitchie looked confused. "Silver and black,"

The doctor nodded. "Yes. Silver and black goes with everything, and no matter what color dress your guests are wearing, they pop,"

Mitchie turned to me. "That's perfect!"

Doctor Bailey pointed to George. "You go get one hundred balloons in silver and a hundred in black – shiny black," She pointed to Alex. "You help him blow up the balloons," she pointed to Christina. "You go get the lobby set up," then she pointed to Meredith. "And you go get some catering menus. Now move!"

All the doctors raced off leaving Mitchie, Uncle Brown, and me sitting there in the conference room. I turned to Mitchie. "Well that works," I laughed.

Mitchie smiled. "I go tell Denny what the plan is. I'm sure he'll be happy to know that he's not going to be missing out on any of the fun!"

She set off and Uncle Brown and I stayed in the conference room. "I better go tell all the campers that the party has been moved to the hospital,"

X X X

Uncle Brown went back to camp and told everyone about Denny and why we're gonna have the promette at the hospital, while Mitchie, the doctors, and I all set up the lobby to look how we wanted it.

Mitchie set the punch bowl down on the table with a blue table cloth on it and then also put cups next to it. I set up the food table and put plates, forks, spoons, and knives decoratively down. We got silver eating utensils, and blue tablecloths.

One of the doctors came up to me holding a couple catering menus. "Which one?" she asked. I took the menus from her, looked at them, and then handed her the Corner Bakery one. She set off again.

George started putting up light and dark blue streamers and put them all around the lobby. I helped him put them up.

Then, Alex the asshole came back with Christina and they were holding a crap-load of balloons. They started tying the balloons in random places and then put a bunch on the silver staircase that led down into the lobby where our party was set up. The lobby was actually placed in between two sets of stairs, one leading up to the rooms and the other leading out to the main entrance.

It was getting late by the time we had finished setting everything up – it looked quite bitchtastic. There's a new word for your vocabulary!

The streamers were hanging from the ceiling and went around the walls. There was a stereo set up in the corner- my uncle would be the deejay. Black and silver balloons created an arch at each stairwell and then other balloons were randomly placed everywhere. We were going to set up all the food tomorrow, but we had the punch bowl and the trays where the cookies would go all set up, and plates, napkins, and stuff like that were set up as well.

Everything matched – it was all either silver, black, or blue.

When we were certain everything was perfectly set up, Mitchie went up to Denny's room. I went with her. She knocked on Denny's door and then went over to him. "We got the whole promette set up,"

Denny smiled. "Good. Hey, listen, Mitchie," he said. Mitchie scooted closer to him. "I want you to go with someone else to the promette – someone who can actually dance and wear a tux,"

Mitchie frowned. "But what about you? I'd feel bad,"

He shook his head. "Don't feel bad. I want you to have fun tomorrow night,"

Mitchie half smiled. "Ok, Denny. I'll see you tomorrow," She turned to head out the door.

"Hey," Denny said, causing her to stop dead in her tracks. She turned around. "I love you," he said.

Mitchie smiled. "I love you too. Get better, ok?" she said.

I walked Mitchie out the door and we went back to camp with Uncle Brown.

X X X

When we got back to the camp, Mitchie sighed. "Now I don't have a date to the promette,"

I thought of some people she could take. Jason already had a date… but Nate didn't! "Nate!" I exclaimed.

She turned to me. "What?"

I nodded. "Nate. He doesn't have anyone to take to the prom. Go ask him. I'm sure he'll be delighted to take you,"

Mitchie stood up. "I'll go right now!" she headed off.

I lay down in my bed and pulled the covers over my head. Wow this has been a long day.

Nate came into the cabin a couple minutes later. "I'm going to the prom with Mitchie!" he exclaimed happily.

I frowned to myself, a little jealous that he got a beautiful and nice girl like that and I got stuck with a bitch. Not just _a_ bitch; _The_ bitch. The bitch that wears a wedding dress to a prom… er, a _promette_.

**A\N: I need some help here… In your review, tell me who you want for prom king and queen! Oh, and vote on my poll if you already haven't! The Camp Rock 2008 Promette King and Queen are…. ? You decide! Tomorrow's the promette! Aren't you all so excited?! I am!  
**


	26. Chasing Cars Season 1 Finale

Camp Revenge

**A\N: Well the end is here guys! I hope you all don't hate me… I made a sequel though and I'll put is as the 27th chapter of this story… It's called "Camp Revenge 2" Original, eh? Because this is the finale, I made it triple the length I normally would. Camp Revenge ends with a bang! **

**Camp Revenge**

**Chapter 26**

My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of view

It was the day of the promette. We were eating lunch and then Uncle Brown stood on a box. "Hey campers! I have an announcement to make!"

Everyone shut up and looked at Uncle Brown. "As you all know, today is the day of the one and only Camp Rock promette!" Everyone started clapping and cheering. "Alright, alright, settle down. Now, right here I have some pieces of paper and two boxes. Vote for your promette queen and king right here! Only one vote for king and one for queen, please!" he said and then ran.

A swarm of kids suddenly raced over to 'voting booth,' Jason and Anastasia ran over there as well, but Mitchie, Nate, and I decided to wait until everyone left.

Mitchie turned to me. "Who are you gonna vote for?" she asked.

I laughed. "I can't tell you! It'll ruin the surprise!"

She scoffed. "Fine then. I won't tell you who I'm voting for,"

"Good. Cause I don't want to know," I smirked.

When the pack of kids died down, Mitchie, Nate, and I went over and voted. I voted for Jason and Anastasia to be prom king and queen. We sat back at the table and then Tess came over to me. "Hey my king," she said.

I turned to her. "Hi… umm… my queen," I said.

Tess grabbed my hand. "Let's go rehearse," she said and pulled me away from Mitchie and into her cabin. "Now I want you to be your uncle and announce us winning.

I rolled my eyes and stood on one of the beds. "And the winner is… Tess and Shane. Clap, clap, clap," I said in a monotone.

Tess shook her head. "No, no, no! You said it ALL wrong! Where's the enthusiasm?"

"This is me using enthusiasm," I said in my monotone voice.

She let out a huff of laughter. "Umm… no. Try harder, ok darling?"

I rolled my eyes and sighed. I put a sudden cheerful smile on my face and said, "And the winners are… Shane and Tess! God bless you all! Applause, applause!"

Tess started fake crying and then stood on the bed with me. "Oh wow. Thank you so much. I was so not expecting this," she turned to me. "Now you wipe away my tears," she said. I rolled my eyes and wiped away her tears. "This was so unexpected," she squealed. "I'd like to thank you all for everything! I couldn't have done it without you guys!" She turned to me. "Now you make a speech,"

I put on a hick accent. "I'd like to thank the lord and savior – Jesus Christ. Because Jesus is the reason for everything _of course_," I said sarcastically and rolled my eyes, getting off of the bed.

Tess sighed. "Will you not make a fool out of us when we actually get up there?"

"Yeah. Sure. Whatever," I replied.

"And you forgot the kiss,"

I raised my eyebrows.

"Before we get off the stage, you have to make out with me and make everyone jealous and wish they were us… er me," she explained.

I rolled my eyes and kissed her on the cheek.

She scoffed. "That wasn't a real prom queen and king kiss!"

I sighed and turned away from her. "Save it for the prom," I said.

Tess nodded. "You're right. We should do that,"

I rolled my eyes and then left her cabin – hey I have to go get ready for the promette! It takes me a while to shower and get ready. I'm guessing it will take Tess even longer, being the diva she is, and the prom's only in four hours!

When I went into my cabin, I saw Jason and Nate fixing their hair in my only mirror. I shoved them aside and looked at myself. Beautiful as always.

I went into the bathroom and took a shower. After about an hour, there was knocking on the door. "Save some hot water for us!" It was Jason.

I sighed and turned off the water, grabbing a towel. I changed into my tuxedo and then blow-dried my hair. I combed it out and let some of my bangs fall in my eyes. Awesome. I helped Jason blow-dry his hair – I didn't exactly trust him to use the hairdryer by himself; last time he started a fire.

After I was fully ready, there was about thirty minutes to spare. I went over to Tess's cabin. Her little minions were fixing her hair and makeup. I coughed and then Tess turned around. She smiled as she saw me and pushed her loyal followers away and hugged me. "Don't I look beautiful?" she asked.

I nodded. So maybe she doesn't look that bad.

"Well I'm still getting ready, so I'll be out in a few!" she said and returned to her chair.

I smiled and walked out of her cabin and walked over to Mitchie's. She was putting on mascara when I walked in. She was wearing the most beautiful pink dress I had ever seen. She even put her hair up and everything. The dress was strapless and complimented her curves. It was puffy at the bottom and went down to the floor. She turned around and smiled. "Hey, Shane," she said.

I gawked at her. She was stunning.

"Quit staring," she said.

I shook my head. "I wasn't staring," I defended.

"Sure you weren't," she laughed.

Nate came into the cabin. "Mitchie, you look gorgeous!" he gushed and kissed her on the cheek. "The limo's waiting outside. Ready to go?"

I turned to Nate. "We got a limo?"

He nodded. "Everyone else has to ride a school bus, but I got you, me, and Jason and limo,"

"Sweet!" I exclaimed. Nate led Mitchie outside and we met up with Jason and Anastasia. Jason was wearing a blue tux and Anastasia was wearing a black party dress with sparkly red converse. I went into Tess's cabin. She was yelling at Peggy and… uh… what's her face. "Hey, Tess. The limo's here," I said.

Tess turned to face me and squealed. "Yay!"

I held out my arm and I walked her and her wedding dress over to the limo. Our driver held the door open for us, and we all piled in.

We followed the school bus to the hospital. I opened the sky roof and then I stuck my head out of the top. We were driving pretty slowly so I decided to stay there a while with my head out.

After a while, I sat back down in the limo. There were bottles of water and so we all drank them and pretended like they were champagne. When we got to the hospital, our driver let us out and we followed the rest of the campers into the hospital.

When we got inside, the whole lobby was set up with music and food. It was dark out, so the blue Christmas lights we hung up were lit, creating a nice effect. Mitchie kissed Nick on the cheek. "I'm gonna go say hi to Denny," she said.

I turned to Tess. "Me too,"

Mitchie and I went up the stairs and we went into Denny's room. "Hi, Denny," Mitchie greeted.

Denny looked at Mitchie and smiled. "Somehow, I knew you'd pick the pink dress,"

She smiled. "Yeah,"

"Well go have fun at your party, ok?" Denny said.

Mitchie laughed. "Ok. I'll come say hi later,"

"Bye Denny," I said and walked out the door with Mitchie. We went down the stairs, Mitchie's heels clicking, and then went through the arch of balloons. Tess and her wedding dress came over to me.

"Hey darling," she said and kissed me sweetly. Mitchie went over to Nate and they went to the food. "Want to go get some punch?" she asked.

I took my stare away from Nate and Mitchie and turned to my prom date. "Yeah," I said and walked over to the punch bowl. I poured us each a glass of punch and we sat there, drinking it. "So…" I said.

"So…" Tess repeated. "Umm… great party,"

"Yup," I said and took another sip of my punch.

"Yeah…" she said.

I looked over and saw Jason and Anastasia dancing to a fast song – "I don't wanna be in love" by Good Charlotte. "Want to dance?" I asked.

Tess smiled and put her glass of punch down. "Sure," she said and we went to the dance floor. We saw Jason grinding with Anastasia, so we did the same. I bet it was hard for Tess being in a wedding dress and all. I, however, was perfectly fine in my tux.

After a few fast songs, Uncle Brown said into the microphone, "Here's a nice slow song for all of you love birds out there," He played "When you look me in the eyes," by the Jonas Brothers.

Tess smiled. "I love this song," she squealed and we moved to the center of the dance floor. We pressed together closely and slowly rocked back and forth.

While we were dancing, I caught a glimpse of Mitchie dancing with Nate. I stared at Mitchie and smiled at her. She looked back at me, but then frowned. She pulled away from Nate.

"Are you ok?" Nate said.

Mitchie nodded. "Yeah. I'm just… a little claustrophobic. I'll be right back," she said.

I pulled away from Tess. "I have to pee. Be right back," I said and followed Mitchie out of the lobby. She turned the corner to the hallway and I followed her. "Mitchie! Wait!"

Mitchie turned around. "What?!" she barked.

I came closer to her.

"Leave me alone. I'm here with Nate,"

I sighed. "I know. I just… I just…"

She started crying. "Leave me alone. Please,"

Mitchie started running, but I grabbed her wrists. "Mitchie, wait."

She cried some more. "Go away,"

I stared at her beautiful brown eyes. "Mitchie… I… I just…"

"I can't breathe," she said.

"What?"

"I can't breathe with you looking at me like that! It suffocates me! I'm drowning on dry land, and I can't breathe! Stop looking at me like that!"

"Like what?"

"The way you always look at me! That look! You know that look! I'm here with Nate now. We're over, remember?"

I pulled her in and kissed her on the lips. She placed her hands on my face and we made out in the hallway. We backed up until we got into a random room – a supply closet. Mitchie untied my tie and pulled it off of me. She took off my jacket and unbuttoned my shirt. I unzipped her dress and we pushed closer to each other. We made out for a few more minutes, coming up for breath only occasionally.

Then, the door opened. It was Tess. Her jaw dropped and she gawked at us. Then, she slowly closed the door.

My eyes widened.

Mitchie shook her head. "We shouldn't be doing this. We broke up," She zipped her dress back up and fixed her hair. I buttoned my shirt and picked my jacket up from the ground.

"What does this mean?" I asked, tying my tie.

Mitchie looked around. "Uh… panties. I had black panties on. Where are they?" She looked on the ground some more.

"What does this mean?" I asked again.

"I don't know! Ok, I don't!" she exhaled, calming herself. She left the closet and I stayed there for a moment, contemplating weather I should go out or not. I saw her underwear on the ground and I picked it up, putting it in my coat pocket.

I opened the door, and walked out, only to see Tess sitting in the hallway, tears streaming down her face, her wedding dress surrounding her. She looked up at me and cried even more. I sat down next to her. "I thought you loved me," she sobbed.

I sighed and stood back up, leaving Tess sitting in the hallway alone. I looked back and saw that her mascara had run down her face and she looked hurt. I shook my head and looked down at my feet as I walked back to the party.

Loud music was playing and I went over to the punch bowl. I drank some punch as I watched Mitchie talk to Nate. I felt like a pervert peeking from the shadows watching them dance.

Mitchie turned to Nate and said something to him. He nodded and then she went up the stairs. I went over to Nate. "Hey, where'd Mitchie go?"

"She went to go check on Denny," he said. "Are you gonna go say hi too?"

I shook my head. "Not right now," I went over to the food table and ate some chips and crackers. After a couple of minutes of eating my weight, I went over to my uncle. I sighed and leaned up against the wall next to him.

He turned to me. "Something bothering you?" he asked.

I just sighed again and closed my eyes, sitting down on the floor, my knees pushed to my body and my head tucked under my arms. What have I done?

Uncle Brown kneeled down next to me. "What's wrong?"

I looked up at him. My hair was now a hot mess and I felt tears coming. "I made a mistake and hurt two girls," I said.

He sighed and stood back up. "Well I'm about to announce the promette king and queen. Maybe that will cheer you up, eh?"

I just shook my head and buried my face in my arms again.

Uncle Brown stopped the music and spoke into the microphone. "Are you guys ready for me to announce the two-thousand and eight promette king and queen?" he asked.

Everyone cheered and clapped.

"Well then," he continued. "I'd like to get all the nominees up on stage. Please come up if I call your name: Jason, Anastasia, Tess, Mitchie, Nate, and Shane,"

Only three people went up to the stage. Everyone looked around for Mitchie, Tess, and I. I wiped away some tears and then hid under a table.

"Tess? Shane? Mitchie?" Uncle Brown called out. "Where are you guys?"

Well, I'm hiding under a table. Mitchie is talking with Denny. And Tess is crying in the hallway.

Everyone started talking, probably wondering why we all suddenly disappeared.

"I guess we'll have to announce the winner without them," he said. "Drum roll please,"

Some kid did a drum roll sound effect.

"And the Camp Rock two-thousand and eight promette king and queen are…. Shane and Mitchie!"

Everyone gasped. Guess what? The prom king and queen weren't there to accept their crowns.

Suddenly, everyone was silent as Tess Tyler herself came walking into the lobby, her make up smeared and her hair all messed up. She stood there in the middle of the lobby. "Where's Shane?" she asked.

I saw everyone shrug. Uncle Brown turned to the table where I was. "He's under that table," he said.

Tess and her fluffy wedding dress came over to me. She ducked under the table.

"What?" I asked. "Can't you see I'm trying to hide?"

She sighed. "It's about Mitchie,"

My heart skipped a beat. "What?"

Tess shook her head. "Denny… he… he…" She couldn't make out the words but I knew what she wanted to say. I stopped breathing and then got out from under the table and ran up the stairs. Everyone watched as I made my way over to Denny's room. Nate and Jason followed me.

When I got to the room, I saw Mitchie laying in the bed with Denny's limp body. She had her arms around him, her beautiful pink dress spread over the bed. She looked crushed.

I walked over to her.

"Mitchie," I said.

"It was cardiac arrest," Mitchie started. She paused for a second. "He died alone,"

My heart just broke.

"Mitchie? We shouldn't be in here," I said. "There are things they have to… they need to move him,"

She nodded. "Take him to the morgue,"

I sighed. "You can't stay here… I know you want to,"

"Can you please… please. Just get out… I wanna be alone," she whispered.

"Mitchie that's not Denny," I said.

She snuggled closer to him. "Shut up,"

I sighed. "Mitch – that's not Denny. The moment his heart stopped beating, he stopped being Denny. And I know you loved him, but he also loved you. And someone who loves you like that doesn't want you to do this to yourself. Because it's not Denny. Not anymore,"

Nate and Jason came into the room. They were silent and they stood there. Mitchie closed her eyes and sighed. She squirmed a bit. "An hour ago he was sitting here, cracking jokes… and now," she gulped. "now he's going to the morgue," she paused for a moment. "Isn't that ridiculous?"

I looked over at Nate and Jason. Their eyes were filled with sorrow.

"Isn't that just depressing?" Mitchie gasped. "So fucking ridiculously depressing," Tears began streaming down her eyes. "It's just so…" She gasped again. "So ridiculous," She started sobbing, her body shaking with each sob. Mitchie pulled closer to Denny and cried some more, burying her head into his shoulder.

Nate, Jason, and I looked at each other, speechless.

I went next to her and picked her up, scooping her into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face into my jacket, letting her warm tears soak into it. She sobbed some more, and gasped, crying.

I sat down in a chair and she grabbed onto my jacket, clasping it. She continued crying and buried her face in my shoulder. I gently rocked her back and forth. "Shh… Shh…" I whispered into her ear as she cried.

Jason and Nate watched, still speechless. They exchanged glances and looks of sorrow. I kissed Mitchie on the check and closed my eyes, putting my face against hers. She sobbed some more and I rocked her gently back and forth.

I stood up, still carrying Mitchie in my arms and Jason, Nate, and I silently walked down the hall with Mitchie still crying. Her crying filled the hallway and we went down the stairs into the lobby.

As we walked down the stairs, all the other campers were silent and they all stopped what they were doing and looked at us. I made it down the stairs and went into the lobby, walking with Jason and Nate over to my uncle. Everyone parted away as we walked through.

My uncle looked crushed. I sighed. "Denny Torres passed this evening," I whispered.

Uncle Brown sighed and looked down at the ground.

I turned around and Jason, Nate, and I walked through the crowd of sorrow-filled campers. Mitchie was still sobbing uncontrollably, and she held onto my jacket.

"Well that puts and end to the evening," my uncle grimly said.

Nate, Jason, and I went down the stairs to the front entrance and I carried Mitchie out of the hospital. I sat down on a bench outside, Jason and Nate sat down on either side of me. I gently rocked Mitchie back and forth. "Shh…. Shh…" I whispered into her ear.

Mitchie continued crying. I looked at Jason and Nate. They both sighed and I continued whispering into Mitchie's ear. I kissed her on the cheek.

"Everything's gonna be ok," I whispered. "I love you,"

We'll do it all  
Everything  
On our own

We don't need  
Anything  
Or anyone

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

All that I am  
All that I ever was  
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where  
Confused about how as well  
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

Let's waste time  
Chasing cars  
Around our heads

**Camp Revenge….**


	27. Time

Camp Revenge 2

A\N: Here's the season 2 first chapter! I'm so excited I can't stand it! I'm not going to give a lot away, but there's going to be a wedding! Who's gonna get married?

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 1: "Time" **

_In life, time looses all meaning. In the midst of falling in love and falling apart, time ceases to matter. Fifteen minutes… fifteen hours… fifteen days… In life, time flies. In an alternate universe, however, time takes pleasure… in kicking our asses. For even the strongest of us, it seems to play tricks… slowing down, speeding up. Until it freezes. Leaving us stuck in a moment, unable to move. Unable to breathe. Unable to think. So what the hell is time, anyway?_

I sighed. "Mitchie? Could you please open the door?"

Silence.

"I'm serious, Mitchie,"

More silence.

I turned to Uncle Brown. "She's not gonna open the door,"

Uncle Brown went up to the bathroom door. "Mitchie? Open the door,"

He gave up and then turned back to me. "Stay here. Maybe she'll come out soon,"

I sighed again and leaned up against the door. Mitchie had locked herself in the bathroom and she's not ever coming out. Oh, and she also has her prom dress on, too. Laying on the floor. In the bathroom. _My_ bathroom. I slid down the door and stayed there with my knees tucked to my chest. "I know you're upset, Mitchie… I am, too. But you have to come out of the bathroom eventually,"

Silence.

"Please Mitchie?" Now I was begging.

Jason came up to me. "Is she still in there?"

I nodded.

He went over to the door. "Mitchie? Do you want to talk about it?"

Silence.

Nate came over to me and sat down next to me. "So I'm guessing she's still locked in the bathroom?"

I nodded. "Yup,"

"I'm gonna go get some food," Jason said. "Anyone hungry?"

I raised my hand and so did Nate.

"Ok, I'll get take-out at a restaurant or something; I'm sick of camp food," he said and set off.

Nate sighed and stood up. He knocked on the door. "Come on, Mitchie. You've been in there all day!"

"We need to do something," Uncle Brown said.

Then, Uncle Brown and Nate turned to me.

"What? Why are you looking at me?" I asked.

"Because this is familiar territory for you," Nate said.

I scoffed. "Her brother died… how is this familiar to me?"

"Yeah, but you're all dark and twisty inside," Nate countered.

I was appalled. "Dark and twisty?!"

Uncle Brown nodded. "You are dark and twisty inside and now Mitchie is dark and twisty inside."

"So all of the sudden I'm the president of people with crappy lives?!" I asked.

Nate nodded. "So we have to do something… one of us has to go in there,"

They both turned to me again. I sighed.

Flashback

"Come on guys," I begged. "I learned my lesson. I showered in cold water, I have looked at a tree… it's been three hours, and I need hair products!"

"_I guess it's time to embrace the natural look,"_ Nate said.

"_Well have fun," _Jason laughed.

I scoffed. "Guys!" I looked at my phone and saw that they had hung up. I rolled my eyes and walked a little bit more, putting my cell phone back in my pocket.

Much to my horror, a bunch of girls started to scream. "Ahh! There he is!" one of them yelled.

I looked back and saw a mob of girls chasing after me. I panicked and then ran. I turned the corner of one of the cabins, and then tripped over a branch. I fell to the ground and scraped my knee on a rock. "Mother fucker!" I screamed and grabbed my knee. I cried out in pain. Everything was hurting, especially my wrist. I looked at it and saw that it was swelling up. Great. I tried to stay as quiet as I could while the mob rushed past me.

"Where'd he go?" one of the girls asked, looking around.

I started breathing heavily, and then heard someone… singing.

"_Do you know what it's like, to feel so in the dark? To dream about a life where you're the shining star? Even though it seems, like it's too far away, I have to believe in myself, it's the only way,"_ the voice sang. It sounded awful.

I pushed myself up from the dirt, wiping off my pants. I went into the cabin it was coming from and saw a girl sitting at the piano. She had long dark-brown hair with side-swept bangs. She had a red top on with blue jeans. The girl was wearing some disgusting brown boots. "What the hell is with all this racket?!" I screamed at the girl.

She looked up at me and looked like she was about to cry. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. She ran away. I raced after her. "Who are you?" I asked her.

The girl looked up at me. "Um… I'm… uh…"

I rolled my eyes. "Come on. What's your name?"

"Mitchie… my name's Mitchie," she held out a hand for me to shake it, but I just stared at it.

"What kind of a name is Mitchie?" I sneered.

Mitchie gave me a hurt look. "Umm… thanks? I gotta go," she turned to walk away, but I stopped her.

"Mitch, wait," I put one of my hands on her shoulder.

She turned around. "What?"

I gave her a hard glare. "Mitch… You suck. Offense intended."

**Back to present time**

Damn it. Why was I so mean to her? I opened the door and saw Mitchie laying on the floor, her pink prom dress spread around her. I got down on the floor next to her. "Mitchie… maybe we should get out of the bathroom… you know, change into comfier clothes?"

"Stop it," she said.

"Mitchie…" I trailed off.

"Stop it. I mean it," her tone was harsh. "Stop. Talking. There is _nothing_ to talk about. Do you understand me? There is _nothing_ to discuss."

I lay there with her for a moment. "I'm so sorry," I whispered.

She nodded. "Yeah… yeah, me too,"

I sighed and got up from the ground, leaving Mitchie in the bathroom alone again. I went back over to Uncle Brown and Nate. "Come on," I said.

"Where are we going?" Nate asked.

I turned around. "To the kitchen. We're making food. It's what you do when someone dies," I walked out of my cabin and into the kitchen. I got bread and other sandwich ingredients and started making a crap load of sandwiches.

Nate looked at me like I was crazy. "Shouldn't we just order out? I mean Jason went to go get take-out… and why sandwiches?"

I stopped spreading mayo and looked up at him. "Because sandwiches are comfort food."

I continued making my sandwiches.

Nate gave me a weird look. "What's wrong with you?"

I shrugged defensively. "Me? I'm fine! It's Mitchie we're worried about!"

Nate sighed. "What did you do?"

I shrugged again. "Denny died… let's have some perspective and remember that what I did was a tiny, small, little…"

Nate rolled his eyes. "Spit it out,"

I sighed and looked up at the sky. "I made out with Mitchie in a closet and then Tess came in. Oh, and Mitchie's panties are in my pocket,"

Nate's jaw dropped. He was speechless.

**Flashback**

I heard someone rummage through some pots and pans. "Hello?" I asked again. "I can hear you," I rolled my eyes. I looked around a bit, not seeing anyone. My eyes widened when I caught a glimpse of some girl, her face covered in flour, coming out from behind a cart.

"Hi," she smiled and stood up.

I approached the girl. "Do you work here?"

"Uh," she stuttered. "Uh, y-yes."

My jaw dropped. "Wow," I said. "You really get into your work…" She gave me a weird look. "I'm Shane," I said, grabbing a cupcake with blue frosting, "but I'm sure even the kitchen help knows that.

"Of course!" the girl said. "It's nice to meet you!"

I took some frosting off of the blue cupcake and licked my fingers. "Actually it's not so nice," I said. "See my manager said that he sent over my food allergy list, but since I couldn't even go near my breakfast this morning… Can I just talk to whoever's in charge?"

The girl scoffed. "Excuse me?"

I shrugged. "What?" I snapped.

"Well you're kind of being an ass."

"And you are?"

"A person!" she exclaimed. "And there's a way to talk to a person, and that's not it!"

I stared at the girl for a moment. "I'll have my manager send it over now,"

She nodded. "Fine," I turned to leave, but she coughed, signaling me to turn back around. What does this girl want from me?

I rolled my eyes. "Thank you?" I asked, not sure as to what to do.

The girl smiled and nodded. "Much better."

**Back to present time**

I sighed. "Everyone thinks I'm the one that knows what to say to her… I don't know what to say to her," I walked around to the other side of the table. "Dark and twisty Shane… I'm not dark and twisty! And if I am dark and twisty, it's because I live my life under a banner of avoidance. I avoid! I'm an avoider!" I sighed again. "I'm gonna go check on Mitchie,"

I left the kitchen and went back into my cabin. I opened up the bathroom door and saw Uncle Brown laying on the floor next to Mitchie. "How are we doing?" I asked.

Uncle Brown sighed. "We're not ever gonna take off the dress if that's what you mean,"

"Nate is in the kitchen… making sandwiches," I said.

My uncle shrugged. "So? What am I supposed to do?"

"Don't ask – just go," I ordered.

He got up from the floor and left the bathroom. I laid down next to Mitchie. "I don't know what to say to you…"

Mitchie nodded. "I don't know what to say either,"

I laid there with her for a couple of minutes. We just kept looking at each other.

Mitchie closed her eyes. "I feel like I'm moving in slow motion… and everything around me is moving so fast… and I'm just stuck under this enormous pressure because everyone is waiting for me to do something or go somewhere. But I don't… I don't know how to do this. And I have to be this person I don't… I don't know who this person is,"

"Mitchie…"

"How did this happen to me?" she whispered. "How did we end up here? Why am I laying on the bathroom floor in a prom dress? Where's Denny?"

I grabbed her hand. "You're not alone, Mitch,"

**Flashback**

"Wait!" she called out. I turned around a saw a girl wearing dark blue sweat pants and a red tank top. She had really blonde hair.

I stalked over to her. "And you are?"

She folded her arms. "Tess Tyler,"

"As in TJ Tyler's daughter?" I asked, curiously.

Tess nodded. "Yup."

TJ Tyler is a legend. "Tell her I said she's awesome… but you need a little work. Maybe you should go on tour with her and learn a little something," I narrowed my eyes.

She scoffed. "Excuse me?"

"Oh yes, I do believe I just dissed you in front of your peers," I told her, my arms folded across my chest.

Tess came up to me and we had a staring contest. Then, she pushed me. I laughed. "You call that a push? You push like my grandma!" I pushed her, and she tumbled backwards, gasping.

"I can not believe you just pushed me!" she exclaimed.

I raised an eyebrow. "It was pretty amazing, wasn't it? I could do it again if you would like me to,"

She shook her head and then started crying. I rolled my eyes. "Cry baby!" I called out after her, as she ran out the door.

I rolled my eyes and then felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around only to see Mitchie. "Yes?" I asked.

"You pushed that bitch?" she asked.

I nodded. "You saw me, didn't you? Or are you blind?"

She held out her hand for a high five. "Way to go!"

I high fived her.

Back to present time

I stood up and went back into the kitchen. Uncle Brown and Nate were making sandwiches. Uncle Brown looked up at me. "Uh, I'm gonna leave the room for an extended period of time for no reason what so ever," he said and left the kitchen.

I went over to Nate.

He smirked. "So you cheated on Tess with Mitchie – who just so happened to be my prom date. Wow,"

I sighed. Yeah, so that wasn't the best move of my life.

"And I know you're scary and damaged-"

I cut him off. "Dark and twisty,"

"Whatever. It makes you feel like you don't deserve nice things… but you do, Shane. And Mitchie is perfect for you. So I want you to be there for her. Love her. Make her feel special. Because you guys… you were meant to be,"

I sighed and looked down at the ground.

"Now I'll be here making the Goddamn sandwiches and you go be there for Mitchie, ok?"

I nodded and left the kitchen. I went back into the bathroom and laid down next to Mitchie. "So what does this mean?" I asked.

Mitchie just stared at me.

"I just… I just want you to take your time. You know? Take all the time you need. Because you have a choice to make… You and I have a choice to make. But I need you to choose… because I always choose wrong."

_Time flies. Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us want… is more time. Time to stand up… Time to grow up… Time to let go… Time. All we need is more time. _


	28. Guilt

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season2**

**Chapter 2: "Guilt"**

First unwritten rule: Do no harm. Everyone, being the good people that they are, try to live by this rule. But harm happens… and then guilt happens. And there's no way to deal with that. Guilt never goes anywhere on it's own… it brings its friends: doubt and insecurity.

"Hey," Jason said as he walked into my cabin. "I got us some food," he held up a bag from a restaurant. Oh, and guess what this restaurant is called… Denny's. Oh yeah. He went there.

My jaw dropped. "Jason?! What the fuck?!"

He shrugged and went into the bathroom. "I got you a drink, Mitchie," he said.

"Jason! No!" I yelled and ran into the bathroom.

But I was too late. Mitchie took the drink that said, "Denny's" on it and she started crying. "DENNY'S?!" she sobbed. She took the drink and then threw it across the room, letting it splatter all over the wall.

"What?" Jason asked. "I got you a sprite!"

I grabbed Jason's arm and pulled him out of the bathroom. When we got back in the main room, I slapped him across the face.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"For being an idiot!" I replied and slapped him again.

Jason scoffed. "What? Denny's has good food!"

I slapped him again. "You don't go to Denny's if someone with the name of Denny just died you artard!"

Nate came up to us. "He went to Denny's?!"

I nodded. "He went to Denny's!"

Nate slapped him. "You artard!"

Jason scoffed. "What is this? National hate Jason day?"

I nodded. "It may as well be!" I took the take-out bag from his hand and threw it across the room.

"Yeah! Thanks, Shane! Now we have no food!" Jason exclaimed and went into the dining hall.

I sighed and hesitantly went into the bathroom.

"GO AWAY!" Mitchie screamed.

I flinched and then continued walking over to her. I laid down next to her.

"I said go away!" she yelled again.

**Flashback**

I heard a knock at my door. "Go away!" I called out from under my warm comforter.

The person invited himself or herself in, ignoring what I had said. "Hey, Shane."

I groaned. "I'm sleeping… go away!"

"You don't sound like your sleeping… unless you're sleep talking again."

I pulled the covers off of me and saw Mitchie standing over me. I pointed an accusing finger at her. "That never happened, ok?"

She laughed a bit. "Try telling that to the whole camp… they all heard you."

I sighed. "I didn't say anything too embarrassing, did I?"

Mitchie bit her lip. "Let's just say, if I were you, I'd hide that teddy bear."

"WHAT!?" I yelled. "I talked about Mr.Fuzzums?!"

She nodded. "And your… other embarrassing things."

I sighed and laid my head back on the pillow. I put my hands up on my face. "It was bad, wasn't it? As in never be seen again, bad? Cause I don't think my uncle told me the whole story."

"It was pretty bad…"she mumbled, sitting down on the edge of my bed. "You started saying really random things… One of them was," she mimicked me here – "Humma shumma leeeooobbaa estrogen ocean!"

"Oh God…" I whined and closed my eyes, shaking my head. "The things I say in a semi-conscious daze… Did I really say 'estrogen ocean'?"

Mitchie shrugged. "I'm sure everyone's already forgotten about it."

"Believe me; they haven't. People don't forget about these kinds of things. I hate enough people to know that."

"So why _do_ you hate everyone?"

"Cause I'm better than them."

"So being better than someone automatically gives you the right to be a total ass?"

I nodded. "Umm… yeah."

"So I heard you sing a new song…"

"I sang?" Since when?

"In your semi-conscious daze. I liked it,"

I raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

She nodded. "Can you sing it for me?"

I shook my head. "Nope. Now go away. I'm sleeping here."

Back to present time

"I said go away. Didn't you hear me the first time?" she asked.

I shook my head. "I'm not leaving,"

She scoffed. "Why not? Can't you see I want to be alone? Damn it, go away! I want to be alone!" she started crying again. "Please… please go away,"

Flashback

"So, uh," I heard a voice. I quickly turned around. It was Mitchie. "Does your voice sound better over here?

"Why are you here?" I asked.

Mitchie looked taken a back. "I was just listening…"

I scoffed. "Yeah. Why do you think I came down here in the first place? I wanted peace and quiet! Can't people just leave me alone for a while?!"

"You are such an ass!"

"Yeah, well that's all part of the rock star image," I muttered and continued writing down lyrics.

She got up and walked away. I continued writing. "Say good-bye to all my fears… one good song and they disappear…"

Back to present time

I ran my hand through her hair.

"Go away," she sobbed.

"Hey," I whispered.

"Please," she cried.

I shook my head. "I'm gonna be here for you. No matter what you say I'm staying. We're a team, remember? The MoFo's? And teams stick together. We don't quit. We don't run the other way when things get hard. We stay and fight. We always find a way to survive everything,"

Flashback

"So I was thinking we could have cool nicknames," Jason suggested.

I nodded. "I'm Sexy Beast… Nate is Tigger… Jason is Little Bunny Foo Foo… Mitchie is Poop Star."

"Poop Star?" Mitchie asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. You're Lemon Cookie. Got it?"

Mitchie shrugged. "Sure, Sexy Beast."

I smirked. "Fine then, Lemon Cookie. Our team name is the Hannah Montana crew."

"Why Hannah Montana? I hate her," Jason said.

I nodded. "Good point. We don't wanna give our team a bad name."

"How 'bout the MoFos?" Mitchie suggested.

"Good idea, Lemon Cookie," I smiled.

Back to present time

"We're a team. Teams stick together," I whispered.

Mitchie closed her eyes.

I scooted closer to Mitchie. "You know I love you, right?"

She nodded. "I know,"

"Do you love me back?" I asked.

Mitchie stayed silent for a moment. "So what does this mean?"

"What does what mean?"

"Well, I'm laying here on the bathroom floor and you're asking me if I love you,"

"So do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you love me?"

Flashback

"Who had sex?" Uncle Brown asked.

I rolled my eyes. "No one,"

"That's not what everyone is saying," he said, walking into the cabin. "I hope you used a condom. We don't want Mitchie here to leave here all knocked up. That would be bad for the camp… not to mention illegal,"

Mitchie scrunched up her face. "Ew. Like I'd ever do Shane,"

I rolled my eyes. "You'd pay to do me, don't deny it,"

"Would not!"

"Would to!"

"Would not!"

"Would to!"

Uncle Brown stepped in between us. "Did you guys have sex? Yes or no?"

"No!" we both exclaimed at the same time.

Back to present time

Silence.

"Do you?" I asked.

She paused. "I need more time,"

I sighed and then stood up. Time. All we all need is more time.

_We're left with a choice. Either let the guilt throw you back into the pain that got you there in the first place… or learn from the guilt. And do your best to move on. _


	29. Commitment

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 3: "Commitment"**

_To make it… to really make it, in a relationship, it takes major commitment. We have to be willing to go up to the person and ask them out… even if it may do more damage than good. It's all about being committed. Because if we're not, we have no business talking to that person in the first place. _

It's been three days. Mitchie has been laying on the bathroom floor for three days. It's been three days since Denny died. Two days since I asked her if she loved me. One day of silence.

I'm sitting outside the bathroom door. Jason and Nate are with me. We're sitting here eating pizza.

"Do you want some?" I asked Mitchie.

No reply.

"You'll have to eat eventually. You must be starving," I said, taking another bite of my pizza.

Silence.

"Fine. Be that way," I said. "Ill just eat this super-yummy, fattening, greasy pizza all by myself,"

"With a little help from Nate and Jason," Nate added, grabbing another slice.

I nodded. "What he said,"

Still nothing.

I sighed. "Seriously, Mitchie. Last time I checked, one could only go seven days without food,"

Nothing.

Jason grabbed another slice. "I'm perfectly ok with sitting here eating all this pizza,"

I punched him.

"Ow…" he complained, rubbing his arm.

"You don't want sandwiches, you don't want pizza… what do you want?" I asked.

After a moment, Mitchie said, "Denny,"

Jason shook his head. "I already went to Denny's. She didn't want anything from there,"

I rolled my eyes. "She means her brother you fuck-tard,"

"Oh…" he said and grabbed another slice of pizza.

I looked down at the pizza box. It was empty. "We need more pizza," I said, standing up. I looked at Jason's plate. He has at least four slices. "Goddamn, Jason! How much pizza are go gonna eat?"

He shrugged. "Maybe two whole pizzas,"

"Damn. I'll go order some more," I said and called Pizza Hut.

I sat back down next to Jason and Nate. "So what if I make you laugh?" I asked.

"Huh?" Mitchie asked.

"If I make you laugh, will you finally get out of the bathroom and eat something?"

Silence.

I turned to Jason and Nate. They both shrugged.

"I'll make you laugh," I said. "You know, cheer you up a bit,"

More silence.

I began to fake cry. "LEAVE BRITTANY ALONE!" I sobbed. "PLEASE! SHE'S JUST A HUMAN! LEAVE HER ALONE! PLEASE!" I started fake sobbing.

I heard some muffled laughter from Mitchie. I stopped fake-crying. "Pretty good, eh?"

She burst out into laughter. "No, it's not that,"

"Then what is it?" I asked.

"You sounded like Michael Jackson," she giggled.

"I did not!" I defended.

"Did to!" she laughed. "You sound like a creepy child molester."

I just laughed. "Whatever… so are you ready to come out of the bathroom now?"

Silence.

Great. I sighed. "Mitchie… do you want food? Aren't you hungry?"

Silence.

"What about that prom dress? It must be really uncomfortable,"

Silence.

"Please, Mitchie. I'm begging you – come out of the bathroom,"

Silence.

"I bet it's not fun being all alone and dark and twisty in there. It's way more fun out here with your friends,"

**Flashback**

"Cool. Let's go," Nate said. He led the way as Mitchie, Jason, and I followed.

We walked past Tess. "Where are you going?" she asked.

I shrugged. "Places."

"Good luck with that," she sneered.

We went through the forest and I saw a couple of birds. Jason pointed to every single one of them. "BIRD!" he would shout and they would fly away. Then every time it would fly away, he would ask, "Why do they keep running away from me?!" And every time I would tell him he's an idiot and he would ask why… Hmmm…

Our little journey through the woods was cut short when we came across a cave. It was dark and scary and dripping. Mitchie looked inside. "I don't think anything's in there; let's go!"

I shook my head. "My mommy always taught me to stay away from dark caves,"

She scoffed. "Don't be such a baby! If you want you can hold my hand,"

"Uhh… no. Just stay away from the cave, ok?" I told her.

Mitchie went closer to the cave. "I'm gonna go in,"

"No! Stop! You'll get rabies!" I yelled.

She laughed. "Why are you so worried about rabies?"

"Because we're in the wilderness!" I defended.

Nate stepped up. "Yeah. Don't go in there, Mitchie. It could be potentially deadly!"

"Sure it could," she rolled her eyes. "I'm going in. Follow me if you dare,"

**Back to present time**

"What happened to the fun-loving Mitchie? Now you're all dark and twisty… Oh God! You're me! Don't turn into me!" I begged. "Because then in a weird implied way, I'd be dating myself,"

Silence.

I sighed. "Mitchie, I don't want you to be dark and twisty. Don't do this to yourself," I said.

Silence.

"Please?" I asked.

Silence.

"Denny wouldn't want you to do this to yourself. He wouldn't have wanted you to lay on the bathroom floor in your prom dress for three days," I said.

She still didn't speak.

"Don't make me break down the door," I threatened.

After a moment she said, "If you broke the door, I'd go find another bathroom to lock myself in,"

I sighed. "Don't make me sing,"

"Sing what?"

"Hannah Montana,"

"NOO!"

"I'm gonna sing if you don't unlock the door!"

Silence.

"Ok, you asked for it," I smirked. "LIFE'S WHAT YOU MAKE IT! SO LET'S MAKE IT ROCK! LIFE'S WHAT YOU MAKE IT! SO COME ON, COME ON, EVERY BODY NOW!" I sang as loud as I could.

Mitchie started screaming. "Nooo! Please stop! I beg of you!"

"Fine then. Let me in and I'll stop singing," I said.

Silence.

I hesitated for a moment. "So have you had enough time?"

"For what?" she mumbled.

"Do you love me?"

Silence. And then, "Yes,"

**Flashback**

Mitchie knocked on the door. "Shane?"

"Come in," I called out.

She opened the door and ran inside. "Oh my God, I'm so glad you're ok!" She ran over to me and then did the weirdest thing ever…

She kissed me. On the lips. Like she freaking made out with me.

When she pulled away I was speechless. Why the hell did she kiss me? My jaw dropped and her face turned bright red. Mitchie hesitated a bit and then ran out of my cabin.

Jason and Nate looked at me. Nate started laughing. "Wow, Shane,"

I was still speechless. I stood up and ran after her. "Mitchie!" I called out. I ran out of my cabin and caught up with her.

She turned around. "Shane, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, honestly. I don't know what happened, I really don't,"

I shook my head. "No, no. It's ok. Really. It was… kind of nice," I gasped at what I just said. "Fuck! I'm in love with you!"

"Fuck! Me too!" she exclaimed. Mitchie pulled at her hair. "Damn it, what are we gonna do?"

"I don't know!" I cried. I exhaled, calming myself. "Ok. This is bad – very bad. Umm, maybe we should… date? Could that work?"

She nodded. "Yeah. We could do that," She kissed me again.

"Yeah. That's what couples do," I said and kissed her. "See, we can do this. This is good."

**Back to present time**

"Really?" I asked.

"Of course," she said.

Commitment.

_There are times when even the best of us have trouble with commitment. And we may be surprised by the commitments we are willing to let slip out of our grasp. Commitments are complicated. We may even surprise ourselves by the commitments we're willing to make. True commitment takes effort… and sacrifice. Which is why, sometimes, we have to learn the hard way to chose our commitments very carefully. _


	30. Expectations

**A\N: I have 705 reviews! I think I should go listen to that song now...  
**

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 4: "Expectations"**

No one believes that their life will turn out just kind of ok. We all think we're going to be great. And from the day we grow up, we are filled with expectations. Expectations of the path that we make, the people we will help, the difference we will make. Great expectations of who we will be, where we will go. And then we get there.

It's been another day. I'm still sitting by the door. Nate and Jason and sleeping, but I'm awake. I can't sleep knowing that Mitchie is throwing herself away like this.

"Are you sure you don't want food? Anything?" I asked.

Silence.

"I could go get chips and queso from On The Border. Would you like that?" I offered.

Silence.

"You're gonna starve yourself," I said.

Silence.

"I can't let you do that,"

"If you're gonna ask me if I want food one more time, I'll drown myself in the bathtub," Mitchie said.

I sighed. "Fine,"

"Fine what?"

"I'll shut up. Don't kill yourself. If you killed yourself I'd be lonely and become a man whore,"

"You already are a man whore,"

"Thanks,"

"No problem," She paused. "I'm dark and twisty…"

"No you're not,"

"Yes I am,"

"If anyone's dark and twisty, it's me,"

"I wouldn't be so sure,"

"No, I'm definitely dark and twisty,"

"Well so am I. I guess we make a good couple,"

"I turned you dark and twisty,"

"You did not turn me dark and twisty,"

"Yes, I did,"

**Flashback**

Mitchie came after me. "Wait! Shane! Where are you going?"

I turned to face her. "Can you just leave me alone? I want to be dark and twisty!" I walked faster out of the dining hall and went into my cabin, slamming the door. I leaned up against the door and then slid down, sitting on the ground. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing.

Mitchie knocked on my door. "Shane? Are you in there?"

I didn't answer.

"Shane? Please? Open the door," she begged.

Still no answer.

"Please don't be dark and twisty," Mitchie said, her voice filled with sorrow.

Silence.

"But Shane… The dance is next week," she sounded heart broken.

What dance? I stood up and opened the door. Mitchie half smiled and came into my cabin.

I faced Mitchie. "What dance are we talking about?"

Mitchie smiled. "The promette!"

The what now?

"You know, it's like the prom, only for kids our age,"

"A promette, eh?"

"Yeah! It's like the best thing of the year!"

"I don't remember a promette when I went to camp here,"

"That's because it started last year. Everyone brings fancy clothes from home and then you wear it to the promette! It's really fun!"

"I didn't get the memo,"

"You didn't read the pamphlet,"

"Damn right I didn't,"

She sighed. "So you don't have fancy attire?"

"Umm… no. And even if I did, why would I wear it to a stupid camp dance?"

"Because it's what you do!"

I shook my head. "No. No dance for me. That's such a stupid thing. A promette? How lame! And besides, I'm dark and twisty," I lay down on my bed.

Mitchie scoffed. "Fine! I'll go with someone else!"

Back to present time

"Mitchie, I turned you dark and twisty," I told her.

"I don't believe you," she replied.

"Well it's true,"

"I refuse to believe it's true,"

"Are you in denial now?"

"Am I dark and twisty?"

"What?"

"That's my point,"

"Your point makes no sense,"

"I believe it makes sense to yo momma,"

I laughed. "I don't think even my mum would understand your backwards logic,"

"Sure she wouldn't…"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know; ask your momma,"

"Yeah, I'll get right on that," I replied sarcastically.

"You do that," she mumbled.

There was an awkward silence and then I spoke again. "So do you want food? Anything?"

"I'm not hungry," she replied.

"Thirsty?"

"There's water in here,"

"Don't you want to change into comfortable clothes?"

"No. I like my dress,"

"Why don't you get out of the bathroom? You can't stay in there forever. Eventually you'll die,"

Silence.

"What? It's true,"

She paused for a moment. "You really are dark and twisty! Anyone who just throws around the word 'death' like that is truly messed up,"

"Want me to become bright and shiny?"

"I like dark and twisty,"

"You like needy,"

"What?"

"I'm needy. I need lots of things. You like that,"

"I do not!"

"Sure you do!"

"I do not need needy… or dark and twisty. _I_ am dark and twisty. I'm enough,"

"So do you want me to be bright and shiny?"

"I dunno. Do you want to be bright and shiny?"

"I dunno. Do I?"

"Shut up,"

"Get out of the bathroom,"

Silence.

Flashback

"Hey Uncle Brownie," I said. "We were just off to go hang out by the lake,"

Uncle Brown turned to me. "You made friends?"

I shrugged. "I guess so,"

"So are we back to being bright and shiny?" he asked.

I shrugged again. "Not really sure. I guess I'm on the border of dark and twisty,"

He smiled. "Good. I like bright and shiny Shane better than the dark and twisty one,"

I laughed. "I bet you do,"

Back to present day

"Today's the day," I said.

"What?" Mitchie asked.

I stood up. "Today's the day I say goodbye to dark and twisty Shane and hello to bright and shiny Shane,"

"I like dark and twisty Shane, though,"

"So you admit it?"

"Admit what?"

"You need needy,"

"Ok. Fine. I need needy. Happy now?"

I smirked and sat back down. "So are you ever gonna come out of the bathroom?"

"No,"

_We all think we're going to be great. And we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren't met. But sometimes, our expectations sell short. Sometimes the expected simply pails in comparison to the unexpected. You gotta wonder why we cling to our expectations. Because the expected is just what keeps us standing. Still, the expected is just the beginning. The unexpected is what changes our lives._

**A\N: GO SEE THE FUNNIEST WRONGEST PICTURE I TOOK OF JOE AND NICK! THERE'S A LINK ON MY PROFILE!! oh, and review please!**


	31. Scars and Souveniers

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 5: "Scars And Souvenirs"**

People have scars in all sorts of unexpected places… like secret road maps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our old wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere, and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers.

"I am sitting by my bathroom, waiting for my girlfriend to come out and eat something, yay!" I sang. "I am sitting by the bathroom, all day long,"

"Shut up," Mitchie said.

"You don't like my singing?" I asked.

"No. I don't like the song,"

"What's there not to like about it? I wrote it,"

Jason came over to me carrying an On the Border take-out bag. I jumped up. "Food!" I exclaimed grabbing the bag from his hand. "You did get strawberry lemonade, right?"

He nodded.

I giggled and then sat down eating my food.

"What'd you get?" Mitchie asked.

"Chicken strips and fries," I said through a mouth full of French fries.

"What the fuck, Shane?!"

"What? If you want some you can come out and get it,"

"No it's not that,"

"Then what is it?"

"Why the hell did you go to a Mexican restaurant and get fried chicken and French fries? If you want deep-fried shit, go to McDonalds!"

"What?" I defended. "Their food is good,"

"They sell Mexican food – last time I checked, French fries were French,"

"Belgian," I corrected.

"Same thing," she muttered.

"No. Not same thing. Two different countries,"

"Whatever. Let's not argue over this, ok?"

"You started it," I said, stuffing another fry in my mouth.

Nate came up to us. "You got On the Border?"

Jason nodded and then handed him a to go box.

"Yay!" he squealed, taking the box and sitting down next to me. He opened the box and then frowned. "Umm Jason? There's nothing in here,"

He nodded. "I know. I ate it all. I was hoping you'd throw it away for me,"

"So you didn't get me anything?!" Nate scoffed.

Jason shook his head. "Nope," Then he pulled out some queso and nachos. He sat down and started eating it.

"Ooh!" I cooed and grabbed a nacho, dipping it in the queso. "Mmm!" I said, loud enough so that Mitchie could hear me. "These nachos sure are good! Oh, God! I'm like having a foodgasm over here, Mitchie! I sure wish you were here to eat some of this deliciously fattening food with us," I took another chip.

Jason followed along. "Mmm! This is so good!"

Nate crossed his arms. "I wish you guys would have gotten me something,"

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Loser," I said.

Nate scoffed. He reached over and tried to grab a chip from the chip bag, but I slapped his hand away.

"Back off, bitch," I said. "Our food,"

"Please?" he begged.

"Lemme think… no," I said and grabbed another chip.

"You guys are bullies!" he said and got up.

Flashback

"Wake up, sweetie!" she said. "It's time for the promette rehearsal!"

I looked up at her. "Rehearsal? For what, dare I ask?"

Tess let out a huff of laughter. "Silly, willy! We're doing a choreographed partner dance!"

I groaned and planted my face back into my pillow. "No. I refuse," I mumbled.

She pulled me – literally – out of bed and I landed on the floor with a thud. I groaned. "Fine. I'm up, I'm up!" I got back up to my feet and changed into some different clothes.

We went to the dancing hall and there was an instructor there, teaching us all the moves. I looked over and saw Mitchie and Denny dancing. They were both laughing and Denny spun her around.

I completely forgot about Tess until she slapped my wrist. "Pay attention!" she barked.

Back to present time

I sighed. "Nate, wait,"

He turned around. I held out the bag of chips. "Take a chip," I said.

Nate smiled and sat back down with us. "Why the sudden change of heart?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know. Just thought you might be hungry,"

Flashback

She laughed. "The kiss,"

"What kiss?" I asked.

Tess rolled her eyes. "Well we're obviously going to be promette king and queen and the king and queen ALWAYS have a kiss and dance together,"

"Is that why we rehearsed dancing? Because everyone's gonna see us dance when we win?"

"Now you're catching on!" she smiled. Then, she led me over to an open part in her cabin. "Now, let me set the scene for you: We're anxiously awaiting our names to be called. Your uncle Brown calls up every nominee's name and they go to the stage. So, we're standing there smiling and looking down at all the losers who weren't nominated and then Brownie says,

"'And the Camp Rock Two-thousand and eight promette king and queen are…'

"And then someone starts playing a drum roll and he opens the envelope and says, 'Shane Gray and Tess Tyler!'

"And Everyone's clapping and cheering, and I start crying and then we go over to your uncle and he put the crowns on us and then I say something like, 'Wow. I can't believe it. Wow. This is such an honor! I'm so glad you guys voted for me and Shane as king and queen! This is the best day of my life! I love you all!'

"And then we share a big kiss in front of everyone and they're all clapping and whistling and then we walk down from the stage, hand in hand, and the loser nominees smile at us and say 'Congratulations,' but you know deep down inside, they hate our guts,"

I nodded. "I see now,"

She walked over to me. "So now we have to practice our kiss,"

I stuttered and then slowly backed away. Right before Tess could kiss me, there were sirens. I turned my head away from her, causing her to smash her lips on the side of my head. "Do you hear that?" I asked.

Tess scoffed. "Who cares? Someone probably just died. It doesn't matter. Let's just rehearse our kiss," she said and leaned into me again.

I walked away from her. "I'm going to see what's up,"

I went out of the cabin. There was a ambulance. I saw Nate and so I walked up to him. "What's going on, eh?" I asked.

Nate was speechless.

Then, I saw Mitchie sitting over on a rock, crying her eyes out. I ran over to her. "Mitchie!"

She looked up at me, her eyes red from crying. She got up and hugged me.

"What's wrong, Mitchie?" I asked.

Mitchie pulled away form our hug and I wiped away some of her tears. "It's Denny, Shane. He's having heart problems again,"

Back to present time

Nate smirked. "That's not why,"

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"That's not the reason why you let me eat your chips – you've changed, Shane. Bringing you to Camp Rock has done you a wonder of good,"

I shook my head. "I'm still dark and twisty,"

Nate let out a huff of laughter. "That may be true, but now you care about people,"

"Do not," I said, mixing the queso around with a chip.

"Do to," he said. "You let me have your chips because you care about me. You want me to be happy," He smiled. "You're turning into an actual human being!"

I scoffed.

"Don't deny it, Shane. You're a good person," he said, munching on a chip.

Flashback

One of the doctors – his name was Alex - was being a real ass and was banging his head on the table. "No surgeries… no helping in the ER… and here I am planning some stupid prom for a bunch of stupid kids!"

"Hey," I barked. "It just so happens that our friend is in critical condition so you shut the fuck up and be a little nicer, ok? We want to make this special for him but we can't do it if you're gonna be like that!"

Flashback

"Mitchie," I said.

"It was cardiac arrest," Mitchie started. She paused for a second. "He died alone,"

"Mitchie? We shouldn't be in here," I said. "There are things they have to… they need to move him,"

She nodded. "Take him to the morgue,"

I sighed. "You can't stay here… I know you want to,"

"Can you please… please. Just get out… I wanna be alone," she whispered.

"Mitchie that's not Denny," I said.

She snuggled closer to him. "Shut up,"

I sighed. "Mitch – that's not Denny. The moment his heart stopped beating, he stopped being Denny. And I know you loved him, but he also loved you. And someone who loves you like that doesn't want you to do this to yourself. Because it's not Denny. Not anymore,"

Nate and Jason came into the room. They were silent and they stood there. Mitchie closed her eyes and sighed. She squirmed a bit. "An hour ago he was sitting here, cracking jokes… and now," she gulped. "now he's going to the morgue," she paused for a moment. "Isn't that ridiculous?"

I looked over at Nate and Jason. Their eyes were filled with sorrow.

"Isn't that just depressing?" Mitchie gasped. "So fucking ridiculously depressing," Tears began streaming down her eyes. "It's just so…" She gasped again. "So ridiculous," She started sobbing, her body shaking with each sob. Mitchie pulled closer to Denny and cried some more, burying her head into his shoulder.

Nate, Jason, and I looked at each other, speechless.

I went next to her and picked her up, scooping her into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face into my jacket, letting her warm tears soak into it. She sobbed some more, and gasped, crying.

I sat down in a chair and she grabbed onto my jacket, clasping it. She continued crying and buried her face in my shoulder. I gently rocked her back and forth. "Shh… Shh…" I whispered into her ear as she cried.

Back to present time

Holy shit. He's right; I care about people! Damn it! What has this world come to? Am I not dark and twisty anymore… am I actually bright and shiny? Nah, that could never happen! I tried that, remember? It all ended up with me almost dying.

I shook my head and stuffed some fries in my mouth.

"Face it, Shane. You care about other people," Nate smirked and grabbed two of my fries.

I sat there in a silent shock and ate another chip. Dang, these chips are really good. "So does that mean that I'm... nice? I don't think 'Shane' and 'nice' go well together," I said.

Nate shrugged. "So maybe it seems foreign right now, but you'll get the hang of the whole 'nice' thing,"

Nice, eh? As my first act of kindness, I will ask if Mitchie wants some food. "You want a chicken strip, Mitchie?"

Silence.

"Seriously. It's good. Come eat with us,"

"I hate Mexican food," she muttered.

"No you don't,"

"How would you know?"

"Because I saw you eating a taco the other day,"

Silence.

"Please, Mitchie? I know you're sad and depressed about Denny – I am too – but eventually we have to move on. The world won't stop spinning for us. Everyone is going to keep living and breathing and laughing. No matter what you do, you can't change the facts of life – people die. Some people are gonna remember the day that Denny died the best day of their lives – I bet a bunch of people got married that day. So come out here and eat. Because you can't change what happened and all we can do is move on. We always find a way to survive everything,"

Silence. Then, I heard the lock click, telling me that she unlocked the door. I stood up and slowly opened the door. Mitchie was standing there, looking out the window. She turned to me, her pink prom dress slightly spinning as she faced me. She shrugged. "You're right, Shane,"

Mitchie walked closer to me. "And what have I been doing? Laying on the bathroom floor and moping?"

"Mitchie…" I said.

She stared at me for a second and then fell to the ground, crying. Mitchie banged her fist on the ground. "What have I done?" she cried.

Then, she stood up and tried desperately to unzip her prom dress. She started hyperventilating and sobbing at the same time. She fumbled with the zipper and then screamed, "GET THIS DAMN THING OFF OF ME!"

I ran over to her and tried to unzip her dress, but the zipper was stuck. She tugged on the dress, tears streaming down her face. "GET IT OFF!" she screamed.

I raced into my cabin and searched through my desk for some scissors. I went back into the bathroom and saw Mitchie tugging at her dress, crying. I cut the dress off of her and then she hugged me, getting my shirt soaked with her tears.

_So what's worse? New wounds which are so horribly painful, or old wounds that should have healed years ago and never did? Maybe our old wounds teach us something. They remind us where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future… that's what we like to think. But that's not the way it is, is it? Some things you just have to learn over, and over again. _


	32. Change

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 6: "Change"**

_I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right. You believe less so that you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself. And sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. _

One word: Baking. She's baking. Mitchie is baking. Not just like a dozen cupcakes or something – About, maybe, twenty dozen cupcakes. She's in the kitchen… baking. Nothing else. Just. Baking. She's baked cookies, muffins, cakes… you name it, she's baked it. I mean, we could have a bake sale with all this crap!

I walked into the kitchen. "Mitchie? Put down the spoon and stop baking,"

She shook her head. "Denny died. And now I am baking," Mitchie pulled another batch of cookies from the oven. She set the tray down on the counter, letting it cool off, and then put another batch in the oven.

"You're insane," I told her.

"Not insane," she defended cracking some eggs into a bowl. "Just… baking,"

"Fine then. Not insane; crazy, out of your mind, psycho… must I continue?"

Mitchie started mixing some more brownie mix. "If you get to call me that, then I get to call you a man whore. Speaking of which, you better say sorry to Tess," She grabbed a basket. "Here. Bring these to her,"

I took the basket. "Muffins? You want me to bring her a basket of muffins?"

She nodded. "Muffins are comfort food,"

"Actually, sandwiches are comfort food," I said but took the basket anyway. "Don't kill yourself while I'm gone," I said and headed out the door.

"I'm not suicidal!" She called out after me. "Just... baking,"

I went out of the kitchen and went over to Tess's cabin. I knocked on the door and Tess answered. She glared at me and then shut the door.

I knocked on the door again.

She reopened the door. "What?!" she barked.

I held out the basket. "I baked you muffins – Well, Mitchie did, but I'm bringing them to you. Can I come in?" I asked.

Tess slammed the door and then I stood there for a second, thinking about what was going on. I shrugged and then went to my uncle's cabin. He looked at me. "Hi, Shane. What's with the basket?"

I walked closer to him and gave him the muffins. "Mitchie's baking. A lot. She's baked enough to open a bakery,"

Uncle Brown took the basket and ate one of the blueberry muffins. "These are pretty good," he said through a mouthful of muffin.

"But that's the problem," I said.

"What's so wrong about tasty muffins?" my uncle asked.

"She's baking!" I exclaimed.

He shrugged. "So? It's good baking too. She must get it from her mum, eh?"

I rolled my eyes. "You must not understand the problem here… SHE'S BAKING,"

"There's nothing wrong with baking, Shane," he said.

"Everything's wrong with it!" I practically screamed.

Uncle Brown ate another muffin. "Hey go see if she made some of those brownies with the powdered sugar on the top – you know, crack brownies. Yeah, go get me some crack brownies,"

I rolled my eyes and left his cabin. I went back into the kitchen and grabbed every single batch of muffins, cookies, cupcakes, and brownies that I could find – I had to take it all in a wheelbarrow – and I took them all to Uncle Brown's cabin.

He gawked at the treats. "What are you? A PTA mum?"

I took the so called 'crack brownies' our and handed them to him. "Here are your hash brownies," I put my hands on my hips. "Now do you think we don't have a problem here?"

Uncle Brown pointed to the wheelbarrow. "We have a serious problem here," he said.

I nodded. "Now you understand!"

He took the wheelbarrow and we both went back into the kitchen. Mitchie looked up at us, green frosting smeared across her face, powdered sugar in her hair, flour all over her clothes… and was that _egg_ in her hair, also? She's a mess. I went closer to Mitchie and grabbed the spoon she was holding. She tried to fight me for it, but me being taller than her and all, I held it up high and she couldn't reach it.

"Give it back!" she cried and jumped up for the batter-covered spoon.

I shook my head. "No more baking for you, young lady,"

Mitchie kept on trying to get the spoon from me. "This is how I cope, Shane! Give it back!"

I shook my head again. "No," I tossed the spoon across the room and it fell on the floor. I grabbed Mitchie's shoulders and forced her to look at me. "You are a mess. Go take a shower and get cleaned up,"

She huffed. "I'll drown myself in the bathtub unless you give me the spoon back,"

I pointed to the spoon. "It's on the ground. It's dirty… germ infested. Don't bake anymore,"

Mitchie scoffed. "Fine," she said and left the kitchen.

"I'll come check on you to make sure you didn't kill yourself," I called out after her.

"I don't need rescuing!" she yelled.

I sighed and turned to Uncle Brown. I picked up a brownie. "Brownie, Brownie?"

Uncle Brown took the brownie and ate it. He left the kitchen.

I went over to all the mixing bowls and put them all in the sink. I grabbed the spoon off of the floor and put it in the sink as well. I took the wheelbarrow of baked goods and set it out in the dining hall. Then, I went over to Tess's cabin and knocked on the door.

"What do you want?" she asked when she answered.

Oh, God. She's wearing her wedding dress. I walked in her cabin and sat down on her bed.

She sat down on a chair by her bed and looked at me… with that face.

"Don't look at me like that," I said, shaking my head. "It annoys me and makes me feel like you haven't been fed,"

"You cheated on me with your ex-girlfriend… at the prom. Could you get any lower than that?" she asked.

I stared at her, not saying a word.

"Isn't it ironic?" she asked. "We ignore those who adore us, adore those who ignore us, hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us?"

I didn't say anything.

"It's hard to wait around for something you know may never happen, but it's even harder when you know it's everything you want," she continued. "You do what you want… because I'm not what you wanted,"

Silence.

"But even though, I forgive you for what you did," Tess said.

"You forgive me?" I asked.

Tess nodded. "I don't forgive people because I'm weak; I forgive people because I'm strong enough to know people make mistakes,"

I stood up. "I sure as hell wouldn't forgive me if I were you," I said and walked away.

"Don't play games with a girl who can play better!" she called out after me.

I went into Mitchie's bathroom to check on her. I knocked on the bathroom door. "Mitchie?" I asked.

No reply.

The door was unlocked, so I went inside and saw the bathtub filled up with bubbles and everything. But no Mitchie. "Mitchie?" I asked again.

I went over to the bathtub and looked down into it, only to see Mitchie under the water. I stared at her for a second and then reached in the tub and pulled her out. She coughed and gasped.

"You tried to kill yourself," I whispered.

She narrowed her eyes. "I don't need a knight in shining whatever,"

_Maybe it is true. Maybe we don't know what we have until we lost it. But maybe it's also true that we don't know what we're missing until we find it._


	33. Fairytales

Camp Revenge Season 2

**A\N: Did you know the guy who plays Uncle Brown in CR, plays Princess Mia's almost husband in Princess Diaries 2?? And he's also on that show, Dead Like Me, which is rated R and it's funny to hear him cuss since he was in CR lolrus.**

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 7: "Fairytales"**

_Happily ever after. It's our goal in life. It's what we all want. We want to find our prince charming, or in my case, princess charming. We want to live in a castle where there's no drama, no death, no assholes, no nothing. We want to relax and enjoy life to the fullest. We want our happily ever after. We want life to be a fairytale… but life's a bitch._

I dried my wet cast off with a towel.

"Pervert," she sneered.

"Suicidal moron," I countered.

"You know I was naked, right? That makes you a perv,"

"You know you tried to kill yourself, right? That makes you a suicidal moron,"

"I am not a suicidal moron,"

"I am not a pervert,"

"Yes you are,"

"Yes you are,"

"Go away – I don't need rescuing. I don't need a knight in shining armor; I'm not drowning,"

"You would have drowned if I hadn't have saved you,"

"I wasn't drowning,"

"Then what were you doing?

Mitchie narrowed her eyes at me and then she turned to leave. I placed my hand on her shoulder and she turned around, sighing. "I wish I could just have the happily ever after part already and get over it,"

"Don't we all," I muttered.

"Go away," she said, "I have things to do,"

"Hopefully none of those things involve you trying to kill yourself,"

She glared at me and then left her cabin. I went out of the cabin after her and saw her going down by the lake. She sat down on the pier and put her feet in the water.

I snuck up behind her and put my feet in the lake as well. "So uh," I said, "you're not thinking bout throwing yourself in the lake, are you?"

Mitchie shook her head.

I stood up. "Good. Let's keep it that way," I said and walked away.

"Wait!" Mitchie called out.

I turned around. "What?"

"I want to play a game," she said, standing up.

"A game, eh?" I asked, approaching her.

She nodded. "Let's pretend none of this ever happened. No rabies, no broken arms, no bitch, no prom, no deaths, no nothing. Let's pretend that we're not at camp any more and instead, this camp is our royale kingdom and we rule it. I'm a princess and you're a prince – a handsome prince. I just… I need to live a fairytale,"

Fairytale, eh? "I could make that happen," I said.

Mitchie smiled for the first time in a week. I grabbed her hand and we walked back to the camp. "Well, Princess Mitchie, it's time to go back to our palace," I laughed.

She stopped walking. "Well actually, you're just a frog still and I need to kiss you to turn into a handsome prince,"

I laughed. "I see," I got down in a frog position. "Ribit!" I croaked in my best frog voice. I hopped around Mitchie.

Mitchie laughed. "Oh, look. A frog," She crouched down next to me. "Oh, Mr. Frog, if only you were a handsome prince! Then we could run away and live our happily ever after!" She leaned in close and kissed me.

I jumped up and spun around. "Ah ha! I am Prince Shane! Thank you so much for changing me back into a handsome prince!"

She smiled. "You're welcome, Prince Shane,"

I kissed her on the cheek. "So, my beautiful princess, what should we do now?"

"Let's go back to our palace," she said. We walked arm and arm until we got back to Mitchie's cabin. Mitchie turned to me. "Well now I have to change into some princess clothes,"

I laughed. "Ok," I said, turning around and going back to my cabin.

Jason and Nate were sitting on their blow up mattresses playing a hand clapping game. "Patty cake, patty cake, baker's man. Bake me a cake as fast as you can! Roll it, and pat it, and mark it wi-"

I coughed and they both stopped singing and turned to me. Nate coughed and then messed with his hair. Jason sat there like a deer in the headlights. I sat on my bed. "I don't care what you were doing," I said.

Nate stood up. "I have to go… do something. Bye," He quickly ran out of the cabin.

Jason still looked like he was in shock.

I went over to Jason and poked him. "Hey… Jason…" I whispered.

He shook his head and then looked at his wrist which had no watch. "Oh will you look at the time? I better go to my… uh… knitting class... DAMN IT! Why can't I think of better excuses?" he ran away too.

I sat on my bed, confused as ever. Then, Mitchie came into my room. She was wearing a green dress similar to the one she wore to prom. It was kind of like the green "Bop To The Top" dress of High School Musical.

I sighed. "You're not gonna lock yourself in my bathroom wearing a dress again, are you?"

"I'm not," she said walking over to me. "This is my princess dress,"

I raised my eyebrows and stood up. "You're taking this princess thing a little far, eh?"

Mitchie huffed. "DAMN IT IF I WANT TO BE A PRINCESS, I'M GONNA BE A FUCKING PRINCESS!" She screamed.

"Ok, ok, fine," I said.

"And you're my prince," she said, going into my closet and pulling out my prom tux. "Wear this," She threw it at me and I caught it.

I held it up. "Do I really have to?" I asked.

Mitchie nodded. "Right now, I'm mentally unstable and I need you to cooperate, ok?"

I sighed and put the tux on. Because it was dinner time, Mitchie and I walked into the dining hall, everyone giving us stares.

I heard some people whisper. "Look at her, she's a mess," "Poor thing just lost her brother and now she's gone crazy," "I feel bad for Shane, having to go around with a nutcase like that," "Will she ever get over it?" "I heard she cheated on Nate with Shane at the prom,"

I stopped walking and frowned. "Yeah, everybody, look! Look at Mitchie! She's a human traffic accident and everyone's slowed down to look at the wreckage!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at us. No one dared to whisper everything. Mitchie tightened her grip on my hand and led me over to the table.

I turned back to everybody with a scowl on my face. "She's my best friend - Break her heart and I'll break your face,"

_Life is anything but a fairytale. Twist and turns in the road complicate our days and, frankly, it sucks ass. But the thing is, no one lives in a happily ever after scenario. Everyone has those bumps in life that we don't want to go over. No one lives in a castle. No one's life is a fairy tale. All we can do is keep dreaming, and hoping, and wishing that our wildest fantasies will come true one day._

**A\N: Happy Burro Days, everyone! Today is the Llama Lesbo race, and tomorrow is the World Champion Pack Burro Race! Hope you all have a fantastic Burro-licious weekend!  
**


	34. People Don't Change

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 8: "People Don't Change"**

People. Don't. Change. We stay our usual messed up, dark and twisty selves. But in some cases, people stay bright and shiny. No one changes. Change scares me. I like to stick to what I know.

"Mitchie?" I asked. Mitchie was standing in the kitchen.

She looked up at me. "I ate everything,"

"What?" I asked, approaching her.

Mitchie pointed to the fridge. "I ate EVERYTHING in this kitchen – even the tub of butter. Last night. I ate it all,"

I stared at her, a shocked expression played across my face.

"It's a good thing calories don't count when no one sees you eat them,"

I slowly nodded and came closer to her. "You ate everything," I said. "Are you ever gonna do it again?"

She pondered and then shook her head. "Never,"

I raised my eyebrows. "Never ever?"

"Never ever ever,"

"Never ever ever ever?"

"Ok, I'm done with this," she said.

I crossed my arms. "So am I,"

She crossed her arms, too. "Well good then,"

"Good," I said.

"So are you still my prince?" she asked.

I shrugged and put my hands in my pockets. "I don't know. Are you still my princess?" I smiled.

Mitchie smiled and hugged me. "I'll go get my princess costume on!" she exclaimed and then ran.

"Wha – wait!" I called out after her. When she had already run off, I sighed and went back to my cabin. She'd make me put on my tux anyways, so might as well just put it on now.

We met up in the dining hall for breakfast. Jason and Nate were sitting at our table, eating pancakes. Me and my tux and Mitchie and her "princess costume" sat down next to them.

Jason looked at us and then narrowed his eyes. "Since when did you become royale? Is there someone I should know about? Is your mum a queen?"

"Idiots are fun… no wonder every village wants one," I said and grabbed one of Jason's pancakes.

He looked at me and said, "What did you just do?"

"I stole your pancake," I said and shoved it in my mouth.

Jason gave me a confused look. "What?"

"I. Stole. Your. Pancake. I took it off you plate and now I'm eating it," I said.

"Are you kidding?" He asked. "Yanking my chain? Jk-ing me?"

I shrugged. "If I were kidding, I'd dress like you,"

Jason gave me another confused look.

"That top makes you look like an Afghani prostitute," I said, pointing to his shirt.

He looked down at his shirt. "How so?"

"You know, when you think about it, the more I mock you, the more it proves my respect for you," I told him.

Mitchie turned to me. "Why are you suddenly being so mean?"

"Sorry," I apologized. "I get angry when I go without sleep,"

She shook her head. "It's not that. I watched you sleep,"

"Stalker," I muttered.

"Point is – you slept. That's not the reason why you're being so mean – it's because you've changed. You went from mean to nice to mean again… Are you PMSing?"

I scoffed. "People don't change. For example, I'm gonna keep on repeating 'people don't change,'"

She half-smiled. "You changed,"

"Well I could say the same thing about you,"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. You used to be bright and shiny. Now you're so dark and twisty… People don't learn; people don't change. But you did. You're a freak," I said.

"I'm a freak?" she asked.

I nodded. "Oh yeah,"

"That's sweet," Mitchie smiled.

"Shut up," I muttered.

"No, really. It's all warm and fuzzy," she laughed.

I looked over at Nate who was staring at someone across the dining hall, his head rested on his hand. I looked over to where he was staring and saw that girl – what's her face? – Mitchie's friend… Caitlyn?

I snapped my fingers to get Nate's attention. He quickly sat back up. "Huh? What?" he asked.

I let out a huff of laughter. "You were checking that girl out," I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Was not," Then, he hushed his voice to a whisper, "Why? Does she like me or something? Do you know?"

I shrugged. "She's one of Mitchie's friends,"

With the mention of her name, Mitchie turned around. "What? What about my friends?"

I pointed to Caitlyn. "Her. Friend. Yes?"

Mitchie looked over and nodded. "Yes, that's Caitlyn. Why?"

I chuckled. "Well, well, my friend is in love with one of my girl friend's friends… Hey, maybe we can double date!"

Nate scoffed. "I'm not in love with her!"

"Not yet at least," I said, slightly tilting my head to the side and smiling.

"You shut up," he muttered.

"You go die," I retorted.

"What? That was hostile and uncalled for!" he scoffed.

I put on a fake pouting face. "Aww. Little Nate is upset… Just remember, if you sometimes feel a little useless, offended, or depressed, just remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious sperm out of millions,"

Nate started laughing. "That is so wrong on so many levels,"

"What can I say?" I asked. "We live in perverted times, my friend… so about your little girlfriend…" I started.

Nate leaned in close. "What about her? Does she like me? Did she tell you?"

I put on a fake shocked expression. "Slow down there, Mario!" I shook my head and put my hands on the table. "Listen, Nate, if you really want to go out with her, just tell her how you feel,"

"Tell her how I feel?!" Nate exclaimed. "I don't speak girl! Girls are complicated!"

Mitchie scoffed. "Girls are not complicated. Seriously. How hard is it to say, 'Your pretty,' and give us a box of chocolates?"

"Chocolate, eh?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah. We love chocolate,"

"Who's we?"

"We whose sex organs are aesthetically pleasing," she said.

I narrowed my eyes. "Did you just insult me in pig Latin?"

Mitchie laughed. "No,"

"So you like chocolate?" I asked.

"Duh," she said.

I smiled. "Want to meet me tonight at nine by the lake and we can make some s'mores – extra chocolate?"

She laughed. "I'd love to – it's a date,"

"Definitely," I said, and looked over at Nate who was walking over to Caitlyn.

Nate walked past Caitlyn and smiled. She smiled back. Nate went back over to her. "So do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

I laughed at Nate's expense, but surprisingly, Caitlyn got up and they walked out of the dining hall together. Mitchie and I looked at each other and then burst out laughing.

We stood up. "So let's go back to the castle and we can rule over our kingdom," Mitchie said.

"Oh really? What's our kingdom's name?"

She shrugged. "Haven't decided yet,"

Mitchie and I walked out of the dining hall and back to my cabin. I was just walking along when I noticed that Mitchie wasn't next to me. I looked back and saw her gawking at my uncle's cabin, a shocked look played across her face.

I went back over to her. "What the hell's your problem?" I asked.

She pointed to the cabin. "My mommy's a filthy, filthy, whore!"

I looked in the window only to see Mitchie's mum on top of my uncle, wearing nothing but lacy red underwear. My jaw dropped and I looked at Mitchie.

"EWWW!!" We screamed at the same time.

"Oh, God. Oh, God!" I exclaimed, practically hyperventilating. "That's so sick and wrong and twisted and.. NASTY! And oh my God! My uncle and your mum…"

"EWWW!" We screamed again.

I'm going to need liquor… lots and lots of liquor.


	35. My Favorite Mistake

**A\N: Please go read my story 'Superheroes' and my new oneshot I just posted 'Going On Tour.' In Superheroes, Kevin, Joe, and Nick all have super powers, but Nick's is that he can turn into a llama. Going On Tour is about my mum's European tour and what happens when we run into the Jonas Brothers. And it's certainly not what you would expect...  
**

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 9: "My Favorite Mistake"**

_Mistakes. It's what makes us humans. No one is perfect, just like that Hannah Montana song. 'Nobody's Perfect!' Oh, and I officially hate that song because I officially hate her because on her new CD, she totally stole one of Bob Dylan's songs. Not even kidding. But, on with my rant on mistakes, no one can be perfect. There's always gonna be a little scratch on that brand - new car, or a speck of dirt on those brand - new Puma shoes, if you know what I mean. _

"Jason!" I practically screamed when I saw him walking down the path.

He stopped dead in is tracks. "Shane…?"

I ran over to him. "You're twenty-one, right?"

Jason stammered for a moment. "Uh… I don't know. Am I? Is this a test?! Oh my God, I didn't study! I'm gonna fail!" He started crying.

"Just… calm down, ok?" I told him.

He nodded and exhaled. "Ok. Calm,"

"Take out your wallet…" I said.

Jason reached into one of his pockets. But then he stopped and started to break down in tears again. "I can't do it! I'm gonna fail! I'll be held back again! I don't want to be the oldest in my class – don't make me! Please!"

I grabbed his shoulders and shook him. "CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" I screamed.

He choked back some tears. "Ok. I can do this. I'm the little engine that could,"

I nodded. "Yeah. Little engine that could; you can do it – all you have to do is believe in yourself," Oh, God. Now I sound like Mr. Rodgers. It's ok to feel sad sometimes…

Jason grabbed his wallet. "Ok. I have the wallet. Now what?"

"Look inside… and pull out your driver's license," I actually found it kind of amazing that Jason actually passed his driver's test.

He took out his license and handed it to me. "Am I under arrest? Is this why? Please don't make me to go jail! I'm innocent, I tell you – innocent!"

I checked his birthday on the license and when I confirmed he was twenty-one, I put the license back in his wallet. "Now I want you to go to the store and buy me liquor. Anything that has alcohol in it – get it,"

He raised an eyebrow. "I don't know… What's in it for me?"

"What's NOT in it for you?" I asked.

Jason smiled. "You're right! I'm gonna go buy you some beer!" He skipped down the path and I rolled my eyes, walking back to my cabin.

Thirty minutes later, Jason returned with two brown paper bags. I took them from him.

"So why did you make me buy you this again?" he asked.

"Because I just found out my uncle has a dirty mistress," I told him taking out the alcohol. I handed him a beer. He tried to open it up, but couldn't so I sighed, grabbed it from him, went to his car, and opened it using the door.

He gave me a confused look. "How'd you do that?"

I patted him on the back. "Magic,"

"Are you Harry Potter?!" He asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah. I'm Harry Potter,"

His jaw dropped. "Am I a wizard, too? CAN I BE RON?! He's a ginger,"

I scoffed. "Why do I even waste sarcasm on you?"

"So you're not a wizard?"

"No," I confirmed, walking back to my cabin. Jason went with me and we sat there, drinking our alcohol.

By the time it was getting dark, Jason and I were sitting on the ground, leaned up against the wall. We only had one bottle of tequila left and we were sharing it. I took the bottle from Jason's hands. "Mine," I said, taking a swig of it.

"You get your Goddamn hands away from my alcohol," he said and grabbed the bottle from me.

I was so wasted that I wasn't thinking straight. Everything was all twisted and curved and I started hiccupping. Jason and I were laughing hysterically.

"So I said to this one guy, 'You don't park your car here! It's a fire line, no parking zone,'" I slurred.

We both erupted in laughter.

Jason stopped laughing. "Ok. So there was this one time, I was at some grocery store, right? And so I bought some carrots!"

We started laughing hysterically again. I banged my fist on the floor, laughing. "I can't breathe!" I laughed.

I grabbed the tequila bottle and chugged it, hiccupping. Jason and I both started laughing again. I ran my hands through his hair. "You're so pretty," I said and then put my hand on his chest, leaned in, and kissed him on the lips.

Then, Mitchie came in the room. "So you blew me off for a bottle of tequila," she said, and then looked down at me and Jason making out. "WHAT IS THIS?!"

I looked up at Mitchie. "Hey, Mitchie, you're looking awfully whore-ish today… whore-ish… is that even a word?"

"Are you drunk?" she asked, approaching us.

"I AM NOT DRUNK! I am by nature a loud, friendly, clumsy person. Besides, there's no 'I' in drunk," I said and took another swig of my liquor.

She grabbed the bottle of tequila from my hands. "Where the hell did you get this?!"

I pointed to Jason. "This handsome man right here," I said and leaned closer to him again.

We both started laughing again. I rolled over on my side and punched the ground. Then, I punched the wall and it made an indent. I just laughed at it and then Jason hit the wall as well.

I closed my eyes and reached for the bottle of tequila. "Where's the alcohol?" I asked.

Mitchie scoffed. "I'm taking it from you guys,"

Jason aimlessly reached for it. "Give it back. I bought it,"

She scoffed again and then left the cabin. Jason and I looked at each other and then started laughing again.

X X X

I woke up only to find myself on a heap on the floor. Jason and I were leaned up against each other. I muttered something and wiped the drool off my mouth. I leaned over and buried my head in my hands. I felt awful – like about to barf everywhere at anytime.

I slowly got up, grunting, and dragged myself into the bathroom and then puked my guts out. This is so not fun. Man, I hate hangovers. I barfed again and then flushed the toilet, laying down next to it. I closed my eyes and felt my whole body ache.

Uncle Brown came into the bathroom. "You're drunk,"

I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Not drunk – I have a hangover. I _was_ drunk last night,"

He rolled his eyes. "I know what a hangover is, trust me,"

"Yeah. You and your dirty mistress must always get drunk and do the McNasty," I leaned over the toilet. "Oh God…" I muttered and puked again. I flushed the toilet and leaned up against the wall. "Ugh…"

"Dirty mistress? What are you talking about?" Uncle Brown asked.

"Mitchie's mum. Dirty mistress number… three, I think?" I held up four fingers, "Oh, yeah, I saw her all over you," I threw up again.

Uncle Brown sighed. "I'll go get you a banana; it helps with hangovers," He threw me a roll of toilet paper. "Clean yourself up – you're a mess,"

I took the toilet paper and wiped my mouth off with it. I stood back up slowly and then stumbled into the cabin. I looked over and saw Jason laying on the floor, totally passed out. I went past him and went into the dining hall. I got the weirdest stares from some people, my hair a mess, toilet paper roll in hand. I sat down at my table, put my head down and groaned.

"What happened to you?" I heard a voice I had not heard before.

"My uncle has a dirty mistress," I mumbled and slowly put my head up.

The girl looked at me. "Hi we haven't officially met - I'm Caitlyn,"

I gave her a pathetic wave. "If I wasn't so hung over, I would have actually introduced myself to you properly,"

"So you look like hell," she said.

"So do you," I murmured.

"Is that?" she asked. I looked up. "Do you have… is that barf on your face?"

I shrugged. "Probably,"

Caitlyn wrinkled her face in disgust. "Nasty," She took the roll of toilet paper off the table and handed it to me. "Use it. Now,"

I aimlessly reached for the roll but missed with epic fail and just slammed my head down on the table again.

Nate came over to us. "Where did you come from?" he asked.

"The apes – if you believe the Democrats," I said.

He sat down at the table and turned to Caitlyn. "When did he get here?"

She shrugged. "Two minutes ago,"

"What happened to you?" Nate asked.

"My uncle has a dirty mistress," I told him.

Mitchie stormed over to our table and groaned as she sat down. "I. HATE. MY. MUM!" she screamed.

I covered my ears. "Ahh… too loud," I said.

"Why do you hate your mum?" Nate asked.

"My mum is a filthy, filthy, whore," she said, attacking her plate of salad with a fork.

Nate turned to me. "Your uncle has a dirty mistress and Mitchie's mum is a filthy, filthy, whore? Is there some connection between the two?"

Mitchie and I both nodded.

His jaw dropped. "OH. MY. GOD! Your uncle is having an affair with Mitchie's mum?! That makes you two like… step cousins if they get married! Which is sooo wrong since you're dating and all!"

I scoffed. "Ya think?" I slowly stood up. "Now excuse me as I go puke my insides out,"

_So let's face it. You'll never meet a perfect person. Perfect people do not exist. Not even God himself is perfect! I mean, after all, he let the devil create Hell. Are we just gonna take it like that? But then again, what do I know? I'm just a cold, heartless Atheist. So maybe even I'm not perfect. Shane Gray is not perfect. Hmmm... that's pretty deep. You know, that took me a lot of courage to say 'Shane Gray is not perfect' because, let's face it people, I'm pretty gosh darn amazing. _


	36. Dirty, Dirty Stripper Shane

Camp Revenge 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 10: "Dirty, Dirty Stripper Shane"**

_There's something about the possibility of more. More tequila. More love. More anything. More is better._

"I feel like hell," I said and leaned up against Jason.

"Me too," he said, eyes still closed.

"I don't ever want to look at another beer again," I muttered.

"There's a bar in town,"

I stood up. "Let's go,"

I helped Jason up and then he grabbed his car keys from the table, missing a couple times but he finally got them. He sat in the front seat of his car, but I dragged him out. "You're too drunk to drive," I said and got in the front seat.

Jason leaned up against the car. "Ugh…" he muttered and went over to the passenger seat.

I drove us to the bar, and just like Jason said, it was there in the center of town. I parked in three parking spaces – which was ok, because most people here didn't exactly park correctly either. Jason and I stumbled into the bar, no questions asked, and ordered beers - I guess the bartender assumed we were of legal age since we were already drunk.

We sat there drinking them for a while.

The bartender came up to me. "What happened to you?" he asked.

"My uncle is having an affair with my girlfriend's mum," I told him.

"Ouch," he said. He turned to Jason. "You?"

He shrugged. "I'm just totally wasted…"

I held out my shot glass. "Hit me baby one more time," I half-sang, half-slurred.

I dank some more – a lot more – and then called my uncle. "Come pick us up," I told him.

_"What? Why?"_

"Well, I used to drive home after getting drunk, but then some mommies got MADD," I told him.

_"What? Where are you?"_

I turned to the bartender. "Where am I?" I asked.

He held his hand out for the phone and so I gave it to him. He talked to my uncle and then gave me the phone back. I put it in my pocket.

"He'll be here in five minutes," he said.

I nodded. "Can I have another beer?" I asked.

The bartender shook his head. "You've totally exceeded the limit,"

"There ain't no limit on the amount of fucking beers I can buy!" I screamed.

"There is when you start yelling like that,"

Jason moaned and banged his head on the table. "Can't… think right,"

"You can never think right," I said.

"So… true…" he mumbled.

I pointed to Jason. "You know what your problem is?" I slurred.

"What?" he asked, picking his head up.

"YOU OWE ME MONEY!" I slurred and then slammed my head down on the table, groaning.

"You know what I have?" Jason asked.

I turned to him. "What?"

He took out a bottle of pills. "Ritalin – my ADD medicine. It makes you feel happy," he said and handed me three pills. I popped them in my mouth and drank them down with some beer.

Then, I felt someone pull me up. It was my uncle. "Ah, ha ha!" I laughed. "Sir Brownie! Are you here to slay the dragon with us?" I asked.

"No, I'm here to rescue you from the dragon. Now come on," he said and pulled me and Jason by our shirts. He paid the bartender and then we got into his car, I in the backseat, spread out, Jason in the front seat, banging his head on the window.

Uncle Brown drove us back to camp and I went into my cabin. My uncle tugged at my shirt. "Oh no you don't," he said. "We have little kids coming today as day campers and they are going to use your cabin; we don't want them to know what being drunk is at the ripe age of five, eh?"

He led me and Jason over to his cabin. I ran over to his bed and plopped down on it. "Oh, thank God," I said, pushing my face into a fluffy pillow.

"Do I look like I have rubber sheets?" he asked and pulled me up. "You're sleeping on the floor," Uncle Brown grabbed some newspapers and set them down on the floor under a table. He laid me down on the ground under the table and then gave me a stuffed raccoon. "Here's a nice fluffy pillow,"

I positioned the stuffed animal so that I could sleep on it. My uncle put a pot by my head. "It's right by your head. You can't miss it – I just got the carpet cleaned; don't barf on the floor,"

I closed my eyes and tried to go to sleep.

X X X

When I woke up, I'm guessing it was around five and then I got up from the floor and noticed the barf all over the newspapers and the pot… and my face. I wiped it off with my sleeve and then went back to my cabin.

I still seem to be a little drunk… and a little high.

I opened the door and saw Nate and Caitlyn in the cabin, talking. "Let's play strip poker," I slurred stumbling into the cabin. "I'll go first," I started taking off my shirt then ran around. "I'm SUPERMAN!" I yelled.

I started to do the Soulja Boy dance. "Mmm… Soulja Boy… and Soulja Boy…"

I pointed to Caitlyn. "Oh? You got a full house? Well that sure beats my two-pair," I unbuttoned my jeans and took them off, running around in nothing but my boxers.

Caitlyn and Nate exchanged glances but I was too wasted to actually hear what they were saying.

"WULA WULA WOOOO!" I screamed and then made a farting noise with my tongue. "I'm so loopy… woot woot… havin' so much fun!"

I went over to Caitlyn and picked her up from the ground and started dirty dancing with her. She screamed and tried to get away, but I grabbed her and pole danced with her – if she were a pole. "Barney is a dinosaur, from our imagination!" I sang.

Then, I let go of her and ran out of the cabin, running to Mitchie's mum's cabin. She wasn't in there so I went through her dresser and pulled out some lacy pink underwear with a matching bra. "OH YEAH," I said to myself and put them on.

I ran out the cabin and went into my uncle's cabin. He gave me a weird look. "What are you doing?!" he screamed.

I went next to him and placed my hands on his shoulder. "Guess who I am?"

"No!" he said.

"You're right!" I laughed. "I'm dirty mistress number three – AKA Mitchie's mum,"

My uncle grabbed my shoulders and looked in my eyes. "Are you... high?"

I laughed. "OH you better believe so…" I said and then ran.

"SHANE! NO!" He yelled after me.

I ran out of the cabin with my frilly pink bra and matching panties and then ran straight into some little kid. She looked at me and then screamed. I fell to the ground. "Hi sweetie! I'm Harry… Harry Potter," I said and held out my hand. "Nice to meet you, Miley Cyrus,"

Uncle Brown grabbed me by the hair and pulled me up. "OW! OW! OW!" I screamed. "Slow down there, Mario!" I laughed. "Ha! SLOW DOWN THERE, MARIO!" I laughed again and then banged my fist on the ground. "Mario… SLOW DOWN THERE!"

My uncle apologized to their tour guide that was showing the little snot-nosed kindergarteners around and then dragged me by my ear back into his cabin. "You're a very kind son of a bitch," I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Thanks,"

When we got back to my uncle's cabin, Mitchie was there, helping Jason up and then she looked at me and her jaw dropped. "Are those my mum's hooker panties?!"

I laughed and nodded. "Oh yeah. I'm a dirty, dirty stripper!" I went over to her and made out with her.

She pushed me away. "Kiss me when you aren't drunk or high… you taste like vomit," She sighed. "You always make me think that even screwed up people have a chance. So, no. You do not get to break down. You do not get to fall apart. There's still a chance. Pull yourself together and stop getting drunk and high,"

"But what kind of geese?" I asked.

"What?" she asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know."

Then, I collapsed on the ground, laughing my ass off.

_Gimme gimme more, gimme more, gimme gimme more. More. We're gonna need more alcohol, people. _


	37. Gay Incest Dogs

**A\N: Sorry I haven't been able to update in a while, but updates should be often from now on! :)**

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 11: "Gay Incest Dogs"**

_So, uh, I was in Boston, right? And I saw this couple. Gay couple. Nothing wrong with gay people. Except, I noticed the two looked exactly the same - as in twins. As in brothers. As in family. So, they were holding hands. Maybe it was just brotherly love. Until they started making out. Then I knew it wasn't brotherly love. And that means incest. Gay insect. I have nothing against gay people, but when you get into the whole incest thing, it makes me shudder. _

"Ugh," I moaned as I tried to sit up. I was still wearing my dirty, dirty, stripper outfit and I looked over and saw Jason sitting over by me, still as wasted as hell. I saw Mitchie sitting over on my bed, typing on her laptop.

She looked over at me. "Hi dirty, dirty, stripper,"

"Ugh," I groaned again and stood up. "What happened? All I remember is going to the bar and then Jason gave me some pills and that was it,"

"He gave you pills?!" she screamed.

I nodded. "Ritalin. If you don't actually have ADD, it makes you high,"

Mitchie sighed. "Oh my God," She came over to me and pulled be back up to my feet. "Look that way," she pointed to the left.

"Why?" I asked, turning my head.

"Because you're about to throw up and I don't want it on me," she told me.

Then, I barfed on the floor. "Ew…" I muttered.

Mitchie nodded. "That's pretty gross," She wrinkled her nose. "Something smells bad – I can't decide if it's the barf that's on the floor or you,"

"It's me… my pores are leaking out alcohol," I said and went over to my bed. I plopped down and then buried my face into my pillow. I moaned and Mitchie put a blanket over me.

I fumbled with trying to unhook the lacy bra, but I couldn't. "Help…" I pathetically cried out. Mitchie came over and unhooked the bra. I slid it off of me and then threw it on the floor. "Why do you girls wear those things? They're so uncomfortable!"

"Call us crazy…" she muttered.

I fell asleep.

X X X

I woke up to barking… What the hell? I flipped over and sat up. Mitchie was sitting on the floor, playing with two dogs. "What's with the dogs?" I asked.

Mitchie smiled. "Your uncle got us puppies!"

"What?" I asked, rubbing my eyes. "Am I hallucinating?"

She shook her head. "Nope," She pointed to a black Labrador. "This is your puppy," The dog barked and then jumped out of her hands and onto my bed, licking my face.

I pushed the dog away. "Don't lick me; I don't know where your tongue has been, and if you just so happened to lick yourself in inappropriate places, I don't want it on me,"

Mitchie sighed. "I miss dirty, dirty, stripper Shane. He was fun and less angry,"

The dog barked.

"See? Your dog agrees," she laughed.

I picked up the puppy and held him close to my face. "You… are not my friend," I told it and pushed him away.

The puppy whimpered and then jumped off my bed and into Mitchie's lap. "Aww, you made him sad," she said and scratched the dog behind its ears.

I rolled my eyes. "Like I care,"

She stood up and shoved the puppy at me. "Be nice to your puppy,"

"What's his name?" I asked, looking into the dog's brown eyes.

Mitchie shrugged. "I named mine Prince,"

"Then mine is Princess," I said, taking the dog from her.

"But your dog's a boy…" she said.

I shrugged. "He can be a cross-dresser,"

"That works too," she muttered. "Now get up and take Princess for a walk. You've been asleep for a whole day,"

"Seriously?" I asked.

"Seriously," she confirmed.

I got out of bed and saw that I was still wearing Mitchie's mum's hooker panties. I went into my bathroom and changed into some real clothes.

When I got back into my cabin, Mitchie handed me a leash. I took it and put it on Princess's collar. "Let's go," I said.

We walked our dogs out of my cabin and up in the woods. I carried her across the make-shift bridge Denny, Jason, Nate, and I built. I let her down and then we continued walking. After a while, we stopped to take a rest and we tied our dogs to the trees. We started talking about our dogs and stuff and then I looked over at our dogs only to see my dog _humping_ Mitchie's dog.

"OH MY GOD!" I screamed looking at the dogs.

Mitchie turned her head and looked at the dogs. Her jaw dropped. "EW!"

"OUR DOGS ARE GAY?!" I yelled.

Mitchie nodded. "Not just gay – incest. They're brothers,"

"THEY'RE BROTHERS?!" I screamed. "WE HAVE GAY INCEST DOGS?!'

I ran over to the dogs and pulled Princess off of Prince. "No!" I scolded. "No gay incest!"

Princess barked and then jumped out of my hands, humping Prince again. "STOP! STOP!" I yelled and grabbed my dog. "Oh my God. My dog is so horny!" I took Princess and then ran over to another tree, I tied him up and then he started whining and whimpering.

Mitchie walked over to me. "No – you can't stop true love, Shane,"

"But that's sick! And twisted! And wrong – they're brothers!" I defended.

She untied her dog and put her dog next to my dog. Prince licked Princess and then they started humping each other again.

I sat down and buried my face in my hands. "Oh God… Why did we have to get gay incest dogs?"

Mitchie shrugged. "Like I would know,"

"That's pretty gross," I said. "We're like their parents… Oh God! Mitchie! Did we raise them wrong? Are we bad parents?"

She patted me on the back. "No. We did everything we could – they're in love. True love can sometimes be sick and twisted. There was no way we could have stopped this,"

Am I seriously talking about my dog like it's my kid?

I stood up and went over to the dogs. I picked up Prince off of Princess. "Ok, ok. Enough sex, you two," I set Prince down and then picked up my dog. I untied him and I held him out as far as I could away from me. Mitchie put her dog on its leash and then we walked back to camp.

I went into Uncle Brown's cabin. "Our dogs just committed a sin," I told him.

He turned away from his computer and looked at me. "What?"

I nodded. "Gay insect. Our dogs. Are gay. And brothers. And had sex. Before marriage… Oh my God! They committed like three sins right there!"

My uncle rolled his eyes. "They're dogs. Get over it,"

I shrugged and went out of his cabin, still holding my dog three feet away from me. I put him down on the ground and he and Prince cuddled together.

"Three sins," I said to Mitchie. "Our dogs are sinners. Shun them! SEND THEM TO HELL!" I joked.

Mitchie rolled her eyes. "I thought you weren't Christian,"

"I'm not. Did you not catch the sarcasm in my voice?"

She shrugged. "So our dogs are sinners, eh?"

"Yup," I made a popping noise with my mouth.

"You know how we could relieve them of one sin? Maybe God will forgive them," she laughed.

"What?" I asked.

She pointed to them. "If they got married – a doggie wedding,"

I laughed. "Doggy wedding?"

Mitchie nodded. "Why not?"

"Isn't gay marriage still illegal in all states except California?"

"So let's go to California!"

"Umm… no?"

"Shane – they're dogs. Those rules don't apply," She grabbed my hand. "Come on!"

"Where are we going?" I asked and grabbed our dogs' leashes.

"To plan a wedding!" she laughed, running into my cabin.

_Well if my dogs are gonna be sinners, I'll have to get used to the whole incest thing. Do they have Gay Incest Parades? I don't think so... should I petition for one? I petitioned for Burro Racing to be the official sport of Colorado... and guess what? We won! It's now officially the official sport! _


	38. Gay Incestuous Liberal Canadian Democrat

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 12: "Gay Incestuous Liberal Canadian Democratic Jatheist** **Doggie Weddings"**

_So weddings are fun. You get some expensive clothes, invite your friends and family even though you hate their guts. I mean, you even have to invite Weird Uncle Scott, the one who you can't trust to leave in the same room as the little girls for more than five seconds. _

This is so wrong on so many levels. Mitchie and I are sitting here, planning a wedding. For our dogs. A doggie wedding. A gay incestuous doggie wedding. That's just sad, eh? Gah, I feel like such a hick with all this going on… I mean, if my uncle and Mitchie's mum get like married… that makes us cousins, er, step-cousins. Step-incest. That's worse than real incest! Ok, maybe not, but you get the point.

Mitchie sat down at our table of ass kicking, writing in a journal. "First off – what day?"

I shrugged. "Before camp ends so we can invite everyone,"

"But what if no one wants to come?" Mitchie asked.

"Believe me. I'll make them want to come… or they'll regret it with a black eye," I told her.

She smiled. "What day?"

"June thirty-first. Saturday. At three,"

"That's in," she counted on her fingers, "Ten days!"

I nodded. "We better get to work on this wedding thing,"

She quickly scribbled something down in her notebook. "What kind of flowers? What color?"

I shrugged. "Pink. And blue. Pink and blue roses,"

"Who's the bride?" she asked.

I laughed a bit. "Definitely Princess,"

Mitchie giggled. "Ok then. Prince will be the handsome groom," She wrote in her spiral and then turned to me. "Ok. What kind of cake?"

I shrugged. "Doggie cake? Maybe we should get a wedding cake for the humans and some dog treats for the lovers,"

She nodded. "Good idea. Now… what color rose petals?"

"Rainbow," I said. "It goes with the whole gay thing,"

"Can you get rainbow rose petals?"

I raised my eyebrows. "What kind of a question is that? Of course you can!"

She laughed. "What was I thinking?" she scribbled in her notebook. "Now. Where will we have the wedding?"

"By the lake. Beautiful scenery. Great for a wedding,"

Mitchie smiled. "That's perfect! We should have an arch covered in roses and vines and then have it be an outdoor wedding," She stood up. "I have to make some calls – rent tables, chairs, get a cake, a priest… Damn there is so much we have to do!"

"A priest? At a gay wedding? Isn't that like so against the Christian religion?" I asked.

"Fine. We'll get a Rabbi," she said.

"I'm not Jewish, either,"

"I am. And so are our dogs," she said.

I scoffed. "Hold up, hold up. Our kids have to be a mix of our religions. I'm an atheist, you are Jewish… They're JATHEISTS!"

"Jatheists, eh?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yes. Jathiests. They're Democrats and drive Priuses and Smart Cars,"

She laughed. "Great. Democratic Jatheists,"

I nodded again. "Very liberal,"

"Dogs don't drive," she pointed out.

I shrugged. "We can pretend that they do… so Rabbi or Justice of the Peace?"

Mitchie pondered this for a moment. "Justice of the Peace… make the Atheist happy,"

I smiled. "Aww, you're so sweet!" I looked over at our dogs who were humping each other. "Whoa, whoa! Save it for the honeymoon, you love birds!"

Mitchie laughed. "They must really be in love… That reminds me! Where are they going to go for their honey moon?"

"France… no. Hawaii. No. England… Canada?" I suggested.

"Canada?" she asked. "What's so great about Canada?"

"Um… just about everything!" I defended.

"Blame Canada! Blame Canada!" she sang the song from the South Park movie.

"Don't make fun of Canada! With George Bush and this economy, Canada is looking better every day!"

"So they're gonna move to Canada? Canadian Democratic Jathiests?"

"Exactly. Canada is so… liberal,"

"Gay Incestuous Liberal Canadian Democratic Jatheist Dogs?" she asked. "I like it!"

I laughed. "Me too! So what honeymoon place?"

Mitchie shrugged. "How 'bout in South Park?"

I nodded. "That works. I've always wanted to go on a honeymoon in South Park, Colorado. Should we rent all the seasons of South Park to celebrate?"

She laughed. "I love that show,"

"Well I love the city! Er, it's actually a county, but same thing,"

"Honeymoon in South Park… how romantic! I'm sure they'll love going out and chasing cows together!"

"How… nice. That's always been my dream – chasing cows," I said sarcastically.

She sat back down at the table, cell phone in hand. "I'm gonna call some people – see if they rent tables, chairs, and whatnot," she grabbed a phone book – don't know why I have a phone book in here – and dialed some numbers. "You go google stuff," she commanded.

I got my laptop from under my bed and logged on, connecting to the internet. When I couldn't get a connection that worked. I closed my laptop. "Damn. It's not working."

"Damn!" Mitchie said. "I can't get a fucking signal out here!"

I turned to Mitchie. "We'll just have to go into town and see what they have!"

She laughed. "The closest city is South Park – South Park will not have wedding stuff, trust me. We could go to Colorado Springs, though,"

I nodded. "Let's go,"

"Now?"

I laughed. "Yeah!"

I ran over to my uncle's cabin. "Hey, Brownie. We're going to go to Colorado Springs to get stuff for our Gay Incestuous Liberal Canadian Democratic Jatheist Doggie Wedding,"

Uncle Brown turned to me. "Your what now?"

"Wedding,"

"For who?"

"Our Gay Incestuous Liberal Canadian Democratic Jatheist Dogs!"

"Why are you going to Colorado Springs? Just go to South Park,"

I scoffed. "Like South Park would have wedding stuff,"

He nodded. "You're right… just be back by tomorrow night or I'm calling the cops and telling them a drunken eighteen-year-old kidnapped a defenseless seventeen-year-old; you have to get your third rabies shot on Saturday,"

"Ok! Bye Brownie!" I said and headed out of his cabin. Mitchie was waiting for me by Jason's car, our dogs on leashes by her.

I took my extra set of Jason's car keys – I have them because he looses his a lot – and then unlocked his car. Mitchie put the dogs in the backseat and then got in the passenger seat.

I put on Jason's sunglasses slowly for effect. "Let's roll," I said and shifted into drive.

_So weddings... theres food. And freinds. And creepy family members. And, sometimes, people you don't even know OR like. All I know, is that right now, I want a cheeseburger. _


	39. But I'm A Canadian!

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 13: "But I'm a Canadian!"**

_So let's talk Canada. It's probably the best country ever. It's cold, you can ski, they have GREAT beer, AND they aren't run by a dickhead, commonly known as George 'Dub-ya' Bush. Heh, heh. Bush. I'm so dirty. Anyone get it? I bet you don't because you don't have a dirty mind like I do.  
_

We arrived in Colorado Springs around ten at night. I got us a hotel room at a Best Western – I had to sneak the dogs in - and after we settled into the room, I quickly fell asleep; driving all night makes to tired. Mitchie and I shared a room, but there were two full-sized beds.

The next morning, I woke up when Mitchie said, "Shane, you're burning daylight! We only have until tonight or Brownie's gonna kill us, remember?"

I groaned and put the pillow over my head. "Five more minutes…"

"I'll go take a shower and if you're not up, I'm going to hit you," she said.

I mumbled something and then tried to go back to sleep.

Next thing I know, Mitchie is punching me repeatedly. "Get up! Get up! We have a wedding to plan, mister!"

I sigh and turn around. I stumble out of bed and go take a shower. When I get out of the bathroom all dressed, Mitchie is by the door with our dogs. I grab my dog's leash and we go down the elevator, going to back way so that the hotel people don't see our dogs.

I put the dogs in the backseat and hop in the front seat, only to see that I'm on empty. "I need some more gas," I said and drove to a gas station. I got out and filled up the car. I opened the door and said to Mitchie, "I'll go get us some snacks; you wait here,"

She nodded and I set off. So, I lied. I wasn't going to get snacks – I was going to get some beer. I went up to some guy wearing overalls, cow boy boots, a red flannel shirt, and a cow boy hat. "Hey, Dude,"

He looked up at me.

I handed him a fifty. "Can you buy me some beer,"

The man looked at me. "Beer, eh?"

I nodded and shoved the money at him. "Yeah. Meet me by the dumpster when you have it,"

He stood up. "Sir, you're under arrest,"

"WHAT?!" I screamed as he put handcuffs on me.

"Trying to buy beer before twenty-one is a crime, you know," he said. I winced as he adjusted the handcuffs so that they were really tight.

"Damn it! Why did the one person I ask to buy beer have to be an undercover cop?" I sighed and then thought of something brilliant. "You can't arrest me; I'm Canadian! Laws here don't apply to us Canadians,"

"You're not Canadian." He said.

"Yes I am,"

"You have a Colorado driver's license"

"How do you know?"

"I know who you are – you're Shane Gray. Of Connect Three. You live in Denver, Colorado. Therefore, you have a Colorado driver's license… I assume you do because you drove here. And if you don't have a drivers license then I get to arrest you for more than one thing. Now where's your driver's license?"

"Back pocket. In my wallet,"

He put his hands in my back pocket – which was so AWKWARD, mind you, and pulled out my walled and took out my driver's license. He showed it to me. "See? You are an American,"

"Well my dogs are Canadian"

"So?"

"Well they're my children – if the illegal Mexicans get to stay here when they have their babies here, then I get to be a Canadian if my kids are Canadian! Same rules should apply for me,"

"You're still under arrest,"

"Well it was worth a shot… You know what I don't understand? I'm allowed to go into war and die for our country but I'm not allowed to legally drink some beer? That's pretty messed up, eh? We live in one fucked up country… That's it; The second I get out of the slammer, I'm moving to Canada – I hear the beer there is fantastic,"

I was shoved into a cop car and then I saw Mitchie running to me. "SHANE?! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!"

I looked at her. "I tried to buy some beer,"

"Damn it, Shane! What am I gonna do with you?"

"Call my uncle and tell him to bail me out?"

The car door slammed shut and the police man got in the front seat. I was taken away with sirens and everything and Mitchie stood there, her jaw dropped.

X X X

I was taken to the Colorado Springs police station and they handed me a phone. "You get one phone call," he said.

"But what if no one picks up?" I asked.

"Too bad," he said and walked away.

I picked up the phone and dialed Uncle Brown's number. When he didn't pick up after the fourth ring, I started getting really worried. But then he finally picked up.

_"Hello?"_

"Hi, uh, Brownie? It's me, Shane,"

_"Shane? What number are you calling on?"_

"Uh… the police station's…

_"What? Why are you there?"_

"Well… uh… don't get mad, but, uh… I kinda got arrested,"

_"YOU WHAT?!"_

"I said don't get mad!"

_"Damn it, Shane! Where are you? I'll come bail you out,"_

"Colorado Springs prison,"

_"Fuck. Now I have to drive all the way to Colorado Springs?!"_

"Uh… Yeah,"

_"I'll be there in like four hours. Can you survive?"_

"I don't know. Please don't let me die here!"

_"You deserve to die,"_

"Whatever. Bye," I hung up the phone and a police man took me into some room and checked me to make sure I didn't have any weapons. When he confirmed I didn't, he made me wear some awful, bright orange, jumpsuit. Then, I had to take pictures. I smiled and held up two thumbs.

"Put your thumbs down," the guy taking the pictures said.

I sighed and just did a Paris Hilton mug shot instead.

Then I was taken to a cell. I was locked up and then saw that I had a cell mate – fantastic.

The big, buff, bald guy came over to me. "What are you in for?"

I cowered over to a corner, trembling. This guy does not look nice. "I tried to buy some beer…"

He laughed. "I almost killed a cop,"

I gulped. "My name's Shane… Shane Gray. Nice to meet you,"

"Yeah I know who you are. You little gay-ass singer person. My daughter's obsessed with you. I'm Justin,"

I awkwardly laughed and then sat down on the bed. "Well I'm gonna go sleep now. Please don't eat me," I whispered the last sentence.

_See? If I were in Canada, none of this would have happened and my phone lines wouldn't be tapped and my emails wouldn't be read. Fucking Bush and his fucking law that says he can spy on us. Oh, gee, I hope I don't get arrested for writing this. You know, he's totally going against the first amendment: "Freedom of Speech." Because, last time I checked, tapping phone lines and arresting people for saying bad things about the government was the opposite of freedom of speech... communist, actually. But, whatever. Screw the constitution. Thomas Jefferson had no idea what he was talking about, right?_


	40. Jail

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 14: "Jail"**

_Bad, ugly people go to jail. I am not bad, nor ugly! I'm beautiful! And I certainly do NOT smell bad like they do. Ok, so maybe I did smell bad when I was five, but what five-year-old didn't?_

I laid down on the bed, but I couldn't sleep because I could feel Justin watching me, burning holes in my back. I sat up. "Excuse me, but I'm trying to sleep here, if you don't mind," Damn it, where is Brownie?

Justin walked over to me. "What did you just say?"

I silently gasped. "Nothing… I said n-n-nothing,"

"You said n-n-nothing?" he mocked my stuttering.

I bit my lip.

"Well? Answer me!" he yelled.

Right before I could say anything else, a guard came over and unlocked our cell. "Lunch time," he said and escorted us to the mess hall. It was not nearly as nice as the one at Camp Rock, and I got a tray, some lunch person – couldn't tell if they were a man or a woman – put some foul-smelling crap on my tray. I think it was… meatloaf?

I turned to the man-lady. "Excuse me sir… ma'am… what is this?"

He-she stared at me.

I bit my lip. "Never mind. I'll just go now," I took my mystery-crap and my tray over to a table that no one was sitting at in the back. I played around with whatever the hell the food was. Well, I'll get real food when Brownie comes and saves the day.

Then, Justin came over to me and sat down across from me. "So. What did you say to me?" he asked.

I looked down at my tray. "Nothing. I didn't say anything to you; I don't know what you're talking about,"

He stood up. "I think you do know what I'm talking about,"

"Hey man, I didn't mean to offend you if I did," I defended.

"I think you did mean to offend me!" He walked over to me and grabbed my disgusting vomit-like orange jumpsuit and pulled me close to him, choking me slightly.

"No! I didn't! Not at all! I'm sorry!" I cried out desperately.

Then, he punched me across my face and I fell to the ground, gasping.

"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" Everyone chanted and looked over to us.

I stumbled back up to my feet and put my hand up to my nose – it was bleeding. Fuck. The guy punched me again in the stomach and I got the wind knocked out of me. I collapsed on the ground and Justin started kicking me – hard. I started crying. He picked me back up. "Don't you dare cry!" he said and punched my face again.

"No! My beautiful face!" I cried out, tears streaming down my cheeks.

Then, I heard whistles going off and then two guards took Justin away, kicking and screaming. One of them turned to me. "Are you ok?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Pretty people like me don't belong in prison," I cried.

A guard came over and brought me back to my cell and gave me an icepack. I sat down on the bed that looked like a cat gave birth on it and held the icepack up to my face.

Then, minutes later, I saw my uncle come over to my cell. "Shane!"

I took the icepack off my face. "Brownie! I knew you'd come to rescue me!"

"What the hell happened to you?" he asked, looking at my face.

I got off the bed and went closer to him. "I got in a fight…"

"What'd you do?!" he asked.

I shrugged. "I didn't do anything. Seriously. Nothing. All I said was 'leave me alone. I'm trying to sleep,'"

He sighed. "Shane, what did I tell you about talking to convicts?"

"That you shouldn't…."

Uncle Brown nodded. "Yeah," he pointed to my face. "You have a black eye,"

I closed my eyes and sighed. "Damn it…"

A guard came over and talked to Uncle Brown.

"I have to bail him out," Brownie said.

The guard shook his head. "He has to stay at least three nights before you can bail him out,"

"But that's the problem," Uncle Brownie said. "I need to get him out for medical reasons – he has rabies,"

The guard smirked. "Rabies, eh?"

I narrowed my eyes and bit down, causing my teeth to make a loud sound. "Rawr. Rabies,"

Uncle Brown nodded and pulled some papers out of his briefcase. "Yes. Here are the medical records,"

The guard looked at them and nodded. "I'll go talk to my boss," he set off.

My uncle looked at me. "You are so lucky you got rabies,"

I nodded. "Who knew rabies would save my life?"

Moments later, two other guards came back. One of them unlocked the door. "Gray – you're free to go," I hugged the guard.

"Oh thank God!" I cried.

He pushed me away from him. "But you have to be on house arrest for three days,"

I sighed. "Don't you mean cabin arrest?"

The guards took me over to a room and handed me my clothes. I quickly changed into my regular clothes and sighed. "It's good to be back in clothes that weren't warn by murderers and poor, smelly people,"

One of the police officers put something on my ankle. "What the hell is this?" I asked, looking down at it.

"A tracking device to make sure you don't run away from your house," he said.

"Believe me. I won't," I said and walked with the guard over to Uncle Brown. He signed some stuff and then led me to a police car.

"Go get whatever you need to get for the rabies thing and then stay at your house – three days minimum," the police officer said. I got in the car and the police officer got in the front seat.

Uncle Brown followed us to the hospital in his car – apparently, I need a police escort to the hospital and back to camp. When we got to the hospital, the police guy had to stay outside the room with the door open – you know, just incase I wanted to kill someone.

When the doctor came in she gave me a weird look. "What happened to you?"

"Jail. Jail happened to me," I told her.

I got my third shot – crying my eyes out – and then I got back in the police car and went back to camp.

When we arrived, everyone looked at me getting out of the police car.

Tess came up to me. "YOU GOT ARRESTED?! MY EX-BOYFRIEND IS A CRIMINAL?!"

I sighed. "Sadly, yes," I was led into my cabin, with Mitchie chasing after me.

"Shane! What happened to you?!" she asked, entering the cabin.

"I got a boo-boo from jail…" I muttered, sitting down on my comfy bed that did not smell like cat piss.

She came over to me and gently pressed down on my bruises. "Ow. That hurts you know," I told her.

Mitchie sighed. "I can't believe you got in a fight,"

I sighed as well. "Me either,"

"You'll be on house, er cabin, arrest for three days and then I'll come back and take the tracking device off your ankle. If you go more than ten feet away from your cabin in all directions, the South Park police will be alerted and you'll be arrested. If you try to deactivate or break the tracking device in any way, shape, or form, you will be arrested. Understood?" the police guy told me.

I nodded. The police guy left my cabin and went off in his police car.

A bunch of campers looked through the window at me. "I HAVE RABIES AND I'M NOT AFRIAD TO BITE YOU!" I screamed at them. They all ran away.

Mitchie turned to me. "You know you're not contagious anymore, right? You could bite me and I wouldn't get rabies,"

I shrugged. "They don't know that,"

_Freedom is a great thing. Maybe that's why there was a giant war a couple hundred years ago. I see why people died for freedom now..._


	41. Court Orders and Foodgasms

**A\N: PLEASE READ!! There are Camp Rock awards!! So vote for your favorite story, author (COUGH COUGH!! ME), or anything else! Go to ScarlettBlush's profile page and you can vote there! But the deadline to vote is August 26 so hurry! Oh, and if you like Camp Revenge... vote for it please! **

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 15: "Court Orders and Foodgasms"**

_Don't disobey the law. If you do, you will get arrested. And George Bush will come to your house and RAPE YOU!! Ok, so maybe he won't, but he'll kick your ass, that's for sure. _

"BROWNIE!" I called out. "BROWNIE!"

Uncle Brown came into my cabin. "What?" he asked, sounding really annoyed.

"Go get me some lemonade pretty please," I begged pathetically.

He rolled his eyes. "You lazy piece of shit…"

"Hey," I said, pointing a finger at him. "I have a court order to be lazy. Go get me some gosh darn lemonade,"

My uncle set off and returned moments later with a glass of pink lemonade. "Here you go your royal majesty. Anything else?"

I nodded. "I hate pink lemonade," I shoved the glass at him. "Get me the regular crap,"

He scowled and walked away with the glass of pink lemonade, dumping it out in the grass.

Mitchie came into the cabin. "Hi my little criminal,"

"Hey baby," I said.

She handed me an icepack. "Here. Put this on your face – it's swelling up,"

I put the icepack on my face and held it there until Uncle Brown came back with regular lemonade. I put the icepack on the table next to me and drank my lemonade. "This is some good shit right here, Brownie,"

Uncle Brown sighed. "Anything else?

"Go get Jason and Nate. I want to talk to them," I told him.

He narrowed his eyes.

I smirked and shrugged. "Court orders," I said and drank some more lemonade. I set the glass down on the table and put the icepack back on my face. "Fucking black eye…" I muttered.

"Yeah," Mitchie said, sitting down. "You're not as pretty as you used to be,"

I nodded. "I'm pretty sure there's more to life than being ridiculously good looking, and I plan on finding out what that is,"

Jason and Nate came into the cabin. "Hey ex-convict," Nate greeted. "You asked for us?"

I pointed to the walkie-talkies that were over on my couch. "Walkie-talkies. Get them,"

Nate rolled his eyes. "You know you're allowed to move around inside your cabin, right? Just not outside?"

I shrugged. "So maybe I'm lazy,"

He got the four walkie-talkies and handed them to me. I handed one to Jason, one to Nate, and one to Mitchie. "Now if we want to talk, I don't have to scream your names,"

Jason turned on his walkie-talkie and went outside.

_"Hey Shane! It's Jason! We can be super-spies!" _

I laughed and pressed the button down on the walkie-talkie. "Yeah. We could,"

Jason came back into the cabin. "They work!"

I nodded. "Now, I want you to go on your first mission,"

"Yes. Anything," he said, standing at attention.

I laughed a bit at him. "Go find my uncle Brown and tell him there's a raccoon in Tess's cabin, ok?"

Jason nodded. "Sir, yes, sir!" He left my cabin and I turned to Mitchie. I burst out laughing.

"What an idiot," I said, trying to control my laughter.

Jason came back in the cabin. "Message from Sergeant Brown: 'There is no fucking raccoon in the Bitch's cabin. Stop getting Jason to send me stupid messages,'"

I shrugged. "Tell him he's a douche bag,"

He nodded and set off again.

Mitchie turned to me. "So about the wedding…"

"What wedding?" Nate cut her off.

She turned to Nate. "Our dogs. Are getting married,"

"When?" he asked.

"June thirty-first at three," she told him.

He nodded. "Send me an invite. I'm gonna go canoeing with Jason,"

As if on cue, Jason came back in the room. Nate grabbed his arm and they left.

Mitchie got her notebook off of the table. "Since you can't leave this cabin, I'll go into Breckenridge and order some wedding stuff. That's only, what, like thirty miles from here?"

I nodded. "I don't know if they'll have stuff there. They only sell t-shirts,"

She shrugged. "They have a doggie bakery. I'll go get some dog treats there,"

"Sounds good," I said.

"Vail might have stuff… People get married in Vail," she said, writing in her notebook.

"Vail's an hour away from here," I told her.

"Beats driving three to Denver or the Springs," she said.

I shrugged. "Yeah, I guess,"

Uncle Brown came into the room. "Hey, guys. Tomorrow the little kiddies come for day camp,"

Mitchie smiled and jumped up and down. "YAY! Little kiddies! I can't wait!"

"What?" I asked.

He walked over to me. "Since you guys are the eldest here at camp, you will be showing all the little day campers around,"

"I can't leave my cabin – I have a court order saying so," I said.

My uncle nodded. "You'll be doing arts and crafts in your cabin,"

My jaw dropped. "Excuse me?"

He nodded. "Yup. Get over it – hard work never killed anyone,"

"But why take a chance?" I asked.

Uncle Brown sighed. "Too bad, so sad,"

"But, Brownie!" I whined.

He already left my cabin. I scoffed. "Oh no he didn't!"

"Come on!" Mitchie said. "It will be fun!"

I shook my head. "I don't want to hang out with snot-nosed preschoolers!"

"I'll be with you in here,"

I pondered this and shrugged. "As long as you're here. Now go get me some food. I'm hungry for dinner and I didn't eat lunch – they wanted me to eat some hot pile of garbage,"

Mitchie smiled and set off. I waited her to come back, and she brought me a bag of Cheetos. "Dinner's not ready yet, but I got you these,"

I took the bag from her and opened it up, munching on my cheesy goodness. "Cheetos taste so much better after you were forced to eat crap," I ate the whole bag. "Mmm! Foodgasm!"

"You know what place always gives me a foodgasm just thinking about it?"

"Hmmm?" I asked.

"On the Border,"

"YES!" I squealed. "ME TOO! Oh my God… Uh oh, foodgasm alert! I need On the Border! Go get some!"

Mitchie laughed. "Ok. I'll get Jason to go get us some," She turned on her walkie-talkie. "Lemon Cookie to Little Bunny Foo Foo. Come to the MoFo cabin! Stat!"

"Stat?" I asked. "Are you a doctor now?"

She shrugged. "Am I?"

Jason came running into the cabin. "What? Who died?"

"You did," I told him.

His jaw drop. "I d-d-died?!" He fell to the floor and broke down sobbing. "I can't believe I died! Who killed me?"

I rolled my eyes. "I did,"

"First you get arrested for trying to buy beer, and now you're a MURDERER?! That's it! I'm turning you in," he stood up and reached for his phone.

I scoffed. "Jason I didn't kill you!"

He stopped looking for his phone. "Oh,"

"I need you to go get me, Mitchie, and Nate On The Border. The usual. And get something for yourself, too, ok?"

He nodded. "Sir, yes, sir!" He turned to leave.

"Don't forget the chips and queso!" I called out after him.

Jason left and returned about thirty minutes later. I grabbed my walkie-talkie. "Hey, Nate. We got you some On The Border,"

_"Actual food this time or just an empty box?"_

"Just come here you stupid mother fucker!" I yelled into the walkie-talkie.

Moments later, Nate came into the cabin. Jason handed everyone a to-go box, making sure he gave us the right meal – the one thing Jason is good at is going to On The Border and remembering what everybody wants.

We all sat in the circle, the sacred bowl of queso in the middle of us, and ate our food and nachos. I dipped my nacho in the cheese and probably took half the cheese out.

Mitchie looked at me. "Woo cwan't twake wall the cweese woo dumb fwuck!" she yelled through a mouthful of chicken.

I sighed and put some of the cheese back, only taking enough cheese to cover the surface of my chip.

_I mean, after all, Georgy has his army, and his loving wife and kids, and his loyal followers, his secret service, his terrorist friends, the Devil (who's actually his lover)... I mean, this guy can seriously kick your ass. You don't want to mess with him and his Nazi band of loyal Republican followers._

**A\N: Don't forget to review if you love me and vote!! (for me?)**


	42. Snotnosed Little Kids

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 16: "Snot-nosed Little Kids"**

_Little kids. They're annoying. They're devious. They're witty. And, most of all, they're manipulative. _

Ugh. In case you didn't get that, let me say it again. Ugh. Kill me now. There are like a billion snot-nosed little kids running around camp. Camp Rock. Since when can five-year-olds sing and dance? Shouldn't they be at some other stupid camp in like Texas or something?

My uncle is hitting me. "WAKE UP, DAMN IT!"

I groaned. "No. Too early. It can't be past eight,"

"It's eight ten," he said.

I groaned again. "Too early. Besides, I'm a criminal. Little kids shouldn't hang around criminals – they'll turn into little bank robbers,"

"No one's gonna turn into a little bank robber from being around you," he said and threw the comforter off of me.

"NO!" I cried out in protest, reaching for the comforter with my feet. "It's cold!"

"Get up, get dressed, and you won't be cold," my uncle said.

I sighed and rolled out of bed – literally – and got up from the floor. I went over to my dresser and pulled on some clothes. It was really hard to get my pants over the goddamn (lowercase 'g') ankle thing, but I finally managed to get my leg through. I put on a blue shirt and then hopped back on my bed, closing my eyes.

"When I said 'get up' I meant stay up, don't go back to sleep," my uncle said.

"The little kiddies are here!" Mitchie squealed, running into my cabin.

"Yeah, help me set up the arts and crafts table," Uncle Brown said.

Jason and Nate came in the room. "Oh my god! Shane! You have to see this! It's like invasion of the little kiddies!" Nate yelled. He walked over to me and pulled me up from my bed. He pointed out the window and I opened my eyes.

"Holy shit!" I screamed when I saw the pack of midgets running around outside my cabin.

I got up from my bed and ran into my bathroom, locking the door.

"Shane? What the hell?" Nate asked, banging on the door.

"I'm Anne Frank in hiding and the little kids are the Nazis!" I called out from behind the locked door.

Nate kept on banging on the door. "Open up!" he said.

"OH NO! THE NAZIS ARE HERE! Please don't hurt me!" I begged.

"Hey, don't make fun of the Jews," Mitchie told me. "You can only make fun of them if you just so happen to be Jewish,"

"I'm a Jatheist," I told her.

"Whatever," she mumbled.

Nate kept banging on the door. "Seriously, Nate. Don't pull a Mitchie on us… oops,"

"WHY YOU LITTLE!" I heard Mitchie scream.

There was more screaming – from Nate – and the sound of Nate hitting the floor. "Stop it!" Nate yelled. "Don't hurt me!"

I couldn't help but to laugh.

"STOP FIGHTING YOU TWO!" my uncle screamed. "You're setting a bad example for the little kids!"

"Sorry," they both apologized. I looked under the door and saw Nate getting up from the floor and Mitchie walking over to the table.

I unlocked the door and got out. I saw Nate sitting down in a chair, my uncle handing him an icepack. "Someone got hurt, eh?" I asked, walking closer to Nate.

Nate narrowed his eyes.

I laughed on the inside and then went over to Mitchie, who was sitting at the table. "Wow. I'm not the only one who got beat up,"

She shrugged. "He asked for it,"

"ALTEAST I DON'T HAVE A BLACK EYE!" Nate yelled.

I turned to face him. "I've been to jail and now I'm tougher – you want to go?"

Nate shook his head quickly. "No. Please don't hurt me,"

Uncle Brown laughed. "Tougher?! I heard you cried when that guy beat you up,"

Mitchie turned to me, a smile stretched across her face. "You cried?!" she burst out laughing, pounding her fist on the table.

"Well he kicked me so hard I thought I had internal bleeding!" I glared at my uncle.

He shrugged and continued putting paper and bottles of glitter glue on the table. "There. It's all set up," he turned to us. "The little kiddies will be here soon. You'll each get assigned to a or two kid,"

"What?!" I yelled at the same time Mitchie said, "YAY!"

"Where's Jason?" my uncle asked, looking around my cabin.

I grabbed my walkie-talkie. "Jason. Here. Now," I said.

Within seconds, he came into the cabin. "Is it little kid time?!" he asked excitedly.

Nate nodded. "YEAH!"

"Am I the only one not excited about this thing?" I asked.

Mitchie turned to me. "You're just dark and twisty,"

"Oh yeah," I replied sarcastically. "I forgot,"

My uncle turned to us. "No fighting, no cussing, nothing mean or offending, and please, talk in a high-pitched, friendly, voice… or it'll be your heads…" he told us and then stepped outside.

Then a few moments later, eight little kids came into the cabin, Uncle Brown leading them in. "Ok!" he said in a cheerful voice. "I'd like you to meet Mitchie," he pointed to Mitchie.

Mitchie smiled and waved. "Hi everybody! We're gonna have so much fun!"

"And Nate," he pointed to Nate.

Nate gave a simple wave. "Hey," he said.

"Jason," he pointed to Jason.

Jason jumped up and down. "Yay! Friends!" He ran over to them and hugged them .

"And over there sitting at the table is Shane,"

I narrowed my eyes and glared at the little kids.

Uncle Brown shot me a harsh glance and I sat up from my slump. "Hey kids!" I said in a overly cheerful voice. I'm not so cut out for bright and shiny.

One of the kids started jumping up and down. "CONNECT THREE! CONNECT THREE!" she screeched.

Jason jumped up and down too. "YEAH! CONNECT THREE!" They both screamed excitedly together and then the little girl ran over to me and hugged me.

"I LOVE you Shane!" she giggled, hugging me.

I awkwardly laughed and then looked at Mitchie, signaling an SOS. (Ooh, this is an SOS!) She walked over to the girl and grabbed her hand. "Why don't we go color? Wouldn't that be so much fun?"

The girl nodded and sat down at the table. Mitchie handed her some paper and crayons. She walked over to me and forced me to stand up. "Pick a kid, any kid," she said.

I shrugged. "Who wants to be my kid?" I asked.

Two little girls – one of them was the one that hugged me before - turned to me and then jumped up and down, screaming. They both ran over to me and hugged me. I laughed a bit. "See? They love me," I said.

Mitchie laughed and squatted down next to the kids so she could be eye level with them. "What are your names?"

"I'm Cassie!" one of them squealed.

"I'm Kayla!" the other one exclaimed.

"Who wants to be my kid?" Jason asked.

Three girls ran over to him and hugged him. He laughed and hugged them back. "Who are you guys?"

"Maddie,"

"Izzy,"

"Amelia,"

Jason smiled. "So, Maddie, Izzy, and Amelia… Who wants to go make me a birdhouse?"

They jumped up and down. "I DO!" they yelled. He laughed and then took them over to the arts and crafts table. To my surprise, there were ten birdhouses that needed to be painted, so Jason got them all smocks and they started painting birdhouses.

Two kids ran over to Nate, and one over to Mitchie. Mitchie got down on her knees so she could talk to him. "What's your name, sweetie?"

The kid looked down at the ground. "Lukas," he replied.

The two kids that were with Nate looked up at him. "I'm Claire and this is my brother, Bernard," the girl – Claire – said.

Nate smiled. "You guys want to go down by the lake?" he offered.

They both jumped up and down – little kids do that a lot – "Yeah!" they both squealed.

"Ok then," Nate said and held hands with them as they walked out of the cabin.

Lukas turned to Mitchie. "Can we go too?"

Mitchie nodded. "Yeah," She led Lukas out of cabin.

Cassie and Kayla turned to me. "Can we go too?!"

I shook my head. "Absolutely not,"

They whined. "Why not?!"

I pointed to my ankle. "See this?"

They both nodded.

"Means I'm a criminal and I can't leave this cabin," I told them.

Cassie gasped. "My mommy told me I'm not allowed to talk to bad people!"

Kayla turned to me. "What'd you do?"

"I had a little too much… cookies. Too many chocolate chip cookies and went crazy," I told her.

She nodded. "I like cookies. Does that mean I'm a bad people?!"

I shook my head. "No,"

Cassie turned to Kayla. "Let's go explore on our own!" The two ran out of the cabin.

"NOOO!" I screamed and ran after them. I can't have those two little kiddies running around the forest by themselves! As I ran, I heard an alarm go off, and my anklet started beeping. I ignored it and kept on chasing the little kids. Damn! They're really fast!

They ran into the forest and I ran after them, my ankle still beeping and flashing red. When I finally caught up with them, I heard sirens and looked over to see two police cars coming after me.

"Freeze! Don't move!" one of the police officers yelled.

I put my hands up and then pointed to the kids. "But the kids!"

"I said don't move!"

Cassie and Kayla came over to me. "What's going on?" Cassie asked.

I turned to them, scowling. "Thanks a lot. You guys got me arrested,"

"Arrested?!" Cassie yelled.

A police man came over and put hand cuffs on me. I narrowed my eyes and they walked me back to my cabin. Cassie and Kayla followed me. I walked back in the cabin and Jason looked at me. "What just happened?" he asked.

"These two little twerps got me arrested," I said.

One of the police officers sat me down on my bed and then cuffed me to the bed. I narrowed my eyes at the little kids and they cowered into the corner. The chain was about ten feet long – you know, so I could go pee and stuff, but not able to run away again. I sat on the bed and used my free arm to put a pillow supporting me.

The police officer turned to me. "Thanks to that escape attempt, you're now on house arrest for a minimum of seven days,"

I scoffed. "It wasn't me! I was trying to save those little kids from being eaten by a bear!"

"I don't want to hear your excuses," he said. "Seven days," He turned to leave.

I held up my middle finger at them, but they didn't see me, thank god.

Mitchie, Nate, and their little kids came running into the cabin. "What happened?" Mitchie asked.

I pointed to Cassie and Kayla. "Those two decided to be cute and run away from me, causing me to chase them into the woods, causing me to be arrested, causing me to be chained to my bed, causing me to be on house arrest for a whole week now," I turned to the kids. "Thanks a lot. You guys totally just made my day," I told them sarcastically.

Damn snot-nosed little kids.

_Oh, and did I mention little kids are practically the Devil and Geroge Bush, only in a smaller form?_

**A\N: Please check out my newest and greatest story, 'Danger'! I'll be posting it soon, so keep an eye out for it! Thanks for all your reviews and everything! I feel like a fuckin superstar! Really, I can't thank you guys enough! **


	43. Little Slaves

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 17: "Little Slaves"**

_So I heard slaves were banned way back when. Too bad we're all George Bush's slaves._

Cassie and Kayla sat on the bed with me. "What do you want?" I asked. They both looked up at me with sad eyes. "What?" I barked. "If you want to be useful, got get me my blanket,"

They both got off the bed and grabbed my comforter off the floor and put it over me. I adjusted it and then pulled it over me, closing my eyes.

Kayla poked me.

"What?" I muttered, trying to sleep.

"I thought we were gonna have fun and make stuff," she said.

"You guys got me arrested and I can't do anything anymore," I told her.

"We're really sorry," Kayla apologized.

"Sorry doesn't cut it, kid," I told them.

They left me alone for a while and I was able to take a quick nap and then I felt more poking. "Leave me alone…"

"I made you a 'sorry' card," Kayla said.

I opened my eyes and sat up. She handed me the card. It was a picture of me with a smile on my face standing next to some poorly drawn pictures of Jason and Nate and it said, "We're sorry, love, Kayla and Cassie," I couldn't help but to smile a bit and I got up from my bed and walked over to my desk. I pulled out a thumbtack and then put the card up on my wall. I hugged them. "Thanks," I said, sitting back down on the bed.

Cassie turned to me. "We're really sorry. Is there anything we can do to make it all better?"

I nodded. "Remember that creepy pedophile guy, Brown?"

She shook her head. "Who's that?"

I sighed and handed her my walkie-talkie. "Press down that button," I pointed to the button on the top, "and say 'where's the lemonade?' in your cutest little kid voice. Then when Mitchie comes back carrying a glass of lemonade, give it to me, ok?"

She nodded and pressed the button whilst saying, "Where's the lemonade?" She giggled and then handed it back to me.

I quickly hopped back in my bed and then pretended to be asleep. "Pretend I didn't ask you to do that, ok?"

Within minutes, Mitchie came in the room with Lukas carrying a glass of lemonade. "Did someone ask for lemonade?" she asked.

"I did," Cassie said, taking the lemonade from her.

Mitchie turned to her. "Is Shane still asleep?"

"Yup," she said. What a good little liar.

"Do you want to come play with me and Lukas?" she asked.

Cassie and Kayla nodded. Cassie set the lemonade down on the table and then the four ran off.

When I was sure they were gone, I grabbed the lemonade and drank it. Mu ha ha ha. My little slaves always get me what I want… you may be wondering: "Why the hell didn't you just ask for lemonade yourself?" Well, Uncle Brown decided he was going to ground me and take away all things that taste good, like lemonade, cookies, chocolate, s'mores… the list goes on and on!

About thirty minutes later, Kayla and Cassie returned and they started jumping on my bed. "Shane! Shane! Wake up!"

I opened my eyes and smiled. "Hey," I said. What? I can't be mean to them – they got me some forbidden lemonade!

"Mitchie took us canoeing! It was so fun!" Kayla squealed.

I laughed. "I bet it was… Hey, I'm kinda hungry, can you do me a favor?" I asked.

They nodded.

"Go tell Mitchie that you want some cookies, ok?" I told her.

Cassie grabbed the walkie-talkie from the table. "Mitchie I want some cookies!"

I ruffled Cassie's hair. "Atta girl!"

Mitchie came into the room with a plate of cookies and she set them down on the table for Kayla and Cassie. "Here you go!" she turned to me. "No cookies for you, mister," She left the cabin.

I went over to the table and pushed them aside. "My cookies," I said and took the plate.

"But Mitchie said you couldn't have any!" Kayla protested, reaching for the cookies.

I laughed. "She was just kidding! It's a little game we're playing!" I told her and put the cookies in my suitcase.

"Oh ok!" Kayla said. She sat back down at the table with Cassie. I got back on the bed.

Mitchie came back in the room. "Hey how are you guys?" she asked. Lukas was with her and he walked over to the table, coloring on a random piece of paper. She looked at the now-empty plate. "Wow, you guys sure were hungry!"

Kayla nodded. "We were! Can we have some more?"

She laughed. "Ok," she turned to Lukas. "You stay here with Shane; I'll be right back,"

I high-fived Kayla. "Way to go!"

Kayla smiled. "No problem, Shane! I love you!"

I smiled and hugged her. "Did I ever tell you how awesome you were?"

She giggled and then sat down at the table, coloring a picture. Mitchie returned with a plate of chocolate chips cookies and Kayla, Cassie, and Lukas ate them. Eh, they can have this batch; I have like ten cookies in my suitcase.

Kayla turned around and handed me a picture of me. It said, "Shane is awesome!" I smiled and then got another thumbtack, putting it up on the wall.

Mitchie turned to me. "Wow, the little kids really love you! Who ever thought they'd actually like you? I thought they'd be crying by now!"

I shrugged. "I have a thing for little people,"

She smiled. "Well can you control all three of them while I help my mum bake a cake in the kitchen?"

I nodded. "I think I can handle it,"

Mitchie left and I turned to Kayla and Cassie. I reached into my wallet and pulled out a twenty. "I will give twenty whole dollars to the first person who can get me a cake,"

Kayla eagerly nodded and ran off yelling, "Mitchie! Mitchie!"

Cassie turned to me. "Can I have a dollar?"

I pulled out my wallet and gave her a dollar bill.

She gasped and took it. "YAY! A whole dollar! All to myself! Thank you, Shane! I love you!" she hugged me and put the dollar in her pocket.

"There's plenty more where that came from," I told her.

Kayla came back in the cabin, glowing. "She said she'd make a whole cake just for me and Cassie and Lukas,"

I handed her the twenty. "Good work, kid," I told her. I high-fived her.

I love my little slaves.

_And I bet George Bush loves his little slaves. And his sex slaves. cough prostitutes cough. What? Who said that?_


	44. Little Bank Robbers

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 18: "My Little Bank Robbers"**

_ Usualy when you think of bank robbers, you think of bad people with black ski masks on. Well I bet you didn't know that they could be innocent little children, did you?_

Mitchie returned with a frosted, devil's food cake, bunt cake. She set it down on the table along with forks, napkins, and plates. She cut pieces off for Lukas, Cassie, and Kayla and then covered the cake up. "If you want any more cake, just ask Shane and he'll get you some," she glared at me. "You better not eat any," She turned to the little kids. "Whatever you do, don't let Shane trick you into letting you eat some of this cake, ok?"

Kayla nodded. "Don't worry, Mitchie. We won't!"

Once Mitchie was gone, I got up from the table and got a plate. I put all the remaining cake on the plate and then covered it up with the tin foil. I put it in my suitcase.

Kayla turned to me. "Mitchie said you can't have any,"

I reached for my wallet. "Don't say anything and I'll," I pulled out a fifty, "I'll give you each a fifty, ok?"

Cassie and Kayla turned to me. "We promise," they both said.

I laughed and gave them both a fifty. They put the money in their pockets. "Now sneak into the kitchen and grab all the chips you can, ok?"

They both nodded and ran off, giggling.

Lukas turned to me. "You're a liar, liar, pants on fire,"

I handed him a twenty. "But we aren't going to say anything, are we?"

He smiled and shook his head. "No way!" He put the money in his pocket. I smiled. Lukas continued colouring and then he handed me a picture. "I made this for you, Shane," he said.

I took the picture and put it with the rest of the pictures.

Kayla and Cassie ran back into the cabin, giggling. They handed me the bag of chips. "Lays… Fritos… You did good," I told them and gave them each a five. I tried to put the chips in the suitcase, but there wasn't any more room so I took the chips, cookies, and the cake into the bathroom and put them in the bathtub, closing the shower curtain.

Jason, Nate, and Mitchie came into the cabin. Mitchie took the empty plate from the table. "Wow! You guys have a big appetite! You didn't give any to Shane did you?"

Kayla shook her head. "No way. You said he couldn't have any so we made sure he didn't take any!"

She smiled. "You guys are so great," she left with the plate.

Jason and Nate went over to me. "Hungry," I said.

Nate turned to me. "What do you want? A salad? Cause that's all you're allowed to get – Brownie's rules,"  
I shrugged. "Sure. With ranch dressing, please," Ha ha, what they don't know is I have my little stash of goodies!

Nate looked confused. "Did you just actually ask for a salad? As in something healthy?"

I nodded. "Yes. Now go get me a damn salad,"

He set off and then Jason's kids went over to the birdhouses they made. They all handed them to him. Jason smiled and took the birdhouses. "Thanks guys! I love you all!" He went into the yard and hung them up on the trees.

Kayla and Cassie turned to me. "Can we have more money?" she asked.

I shrugged and handed them each a penny. They smiled and put the pennies in their pockets. They both handed me more pictures. I thanked them and hung them up on my wall with the other pictures.

Nate handed me a salad. "Here. One diabolical, leafy, pile of crap," he said. I took the fork and took a bite out of it. He gave me a weird look. "Since when do you voluntarily eat healthy things?"

I shrugged. "What else am I gonna eat?" I asked.

"Good point," Nate said.

Jason eyed my salad. "Ew," he said, turning away.

Uncle Brown came into the cabin. "Alright guys! I hope you had fun today! Time to go home now!"

"NOOOOO!" Kayla and Cassie screamed. They both started crying.

Uncle Brown came over to them. "It's ok – you're gonna come back tomorrow," He turned to me.

I shrugged. "They must really like me or something," I laughed.

He smiled. "I don't know what you did, but good job,"

See? I just got rewarded for manipulating kids into stealing food for me and bribing them with money.

The two girls hugged me. "We don't want to go! We love Shane!" Kayla cried.

I shrugged. "I'm a very loveable person," I lied and hugged them back. "It's ok guys. I'll see you tomorrow, ok?"

Kayla smiled. "Shane, you rock!"

"I love you, Shane!" Cassie smiled.

Uncle Brown took them back to the bus. Well those two just left about two hundred dollars richer.

X X X

The next day when the busses arrived, Cassie and Kayla were the first to get off and they ran into my cabin, giving me a hug. "SHANE!" they both exclaimed.

I laughed. "Hey Cassie, hey Kayla,"

Mitchie walked over to me. "Wow, they really love you,"

Kayla turned to her. "Yes, Mitchie, that's because Shane is a fluffy teddy bear!"

I laughed. "Fluffy teddy bear, eh?"

She nodded. "Yes! We love our fluffy teddy bear!" she hugged me. "Will you sing me a song, Shane?"

"Oh, I don't know…" I trailed off.

"PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE?!" They begged.

I sighed. "Fine. Go get Jason and Nate,"

"YAY!" they squealed and set off.

Mitchie came over to me. "Wow. I didn't know you were so good with little kids!"

I shrugged. "I'm a fluffy teddy bear, remember?"

Lukas, Bernard, Maddie, Izzy, Amelia, and Claire came into the cabin with Uncle Brown. Lukas went over to Mitchie. Mitchie smiled. "Hey buddy! What do you want to do today?"

He walked over to me. "I want to hang out with Shane today,"

I couldn't help but to smile. Lukas hopped on my bed and sat next to me.

Mitchie's jaw dropped. "I can't believe it…" she muttered.

I smirked and shrugged.

Bernard, Claire, Maddie, Izzy, and Amelia came over and sat on the bed too.

"So what are we gonna sing today, children?" I asked in a cheerful little kid voice.

_See? My little bank robbers... _


	45. The Secret Club

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 19: "The Secret Club"**

Mitchie smiled. "Well if you got it under control, I guess I'll go help my mum in the kitchen," she turned and left.

Jason and Nate returned with their guitars, Kayla and Cassie right behind them. Cassie and Kayla jumped on the bed with the rest of us – I'm surprised we could all fit on the bed – and then my band members sat at the front of the room.

"Play my music, guys," I told them.

They both started playing and I sang along to "Play my music." All the little kids were really enjoying our acoustic version of the song and they were all clapping along. When the song was over, they all cheered. I smiled. "Thanks guys,"

Kayla whispered to Cassie and then turned to me. "We want you to join the secret club," she told me.

"Secret club? What's the secret? They're all morons?" I asked.

Kayla shook her head. "No. We have a secret code,"

"Oh…" I slowly nodded my head.

Jason turned to them. "Can I join the secret club?"

Cassie shook her head. "You're not cool enough,"

Jason looked hurt. He put his guitar away. "Excuse me as I go sit in a dark corner and cut myself…" he left the cabin.

Nate sighed. "I'll go make sure he doesn't kill himself," He went after Jason.

I turned to Kayla. "What's the secret code?"

She smirked. "You'll have to wait and see!"

I raised my eyebrows. "If it's some sort of cult, I'm not joining. We're not gonna go murder people are we?"

Kayla looked confused. "Why would we do that?"

I shrugged. "Just making sure,"

She just shook her head. "No bad things,"

I squirmed a bit, getting comfortable. "So what would we do?"

She shrugged. "Secret stuff,"

"That's stupid," I retorted. "Do me a favor and go get me some ice cream,"

All the little kids hopped off the bed when Jason and Nate came back in the cabin. They all went over to Jason and Nate, Lukas, Kayla, and Cassie staying with me. When Mitchie came back, she took Lukas somewhere and then Kayla, Cassie, and I were left in my cabin.

"So… secret stuff, eh?" I asked. "What kind of stuff?"

Cassie shrugged. "We don't really know. We just like to have a club,"

"That's really… stupid. Idiotic. Retarded. What's the point of having a club if you don't do anything?" I asked.

Kayla gave me a weird look. "The point is, it's a secret,"

"So secret that even its members aren't allowed to know what the secret is?"

She nodded. "Yup,"

"Wow," I breathed. "That sure is one good secret."

X X X

Five days have passed. I'm still on cabin arrest and I'm as bored as ever. Because the day camp week is over, no more little kids, so I'm even more bored. Mitchie came into my cabin. "We need to plan the doggie wedding," she said, sitting down at the table.

I nodded. "We do,"

Mitchie got her spiral out. "So I ordered a wedding cake and some gourmet doggie treats. I hired a justice of the peace and rented tables and everything. I ordered flowers and other decorations. And," she searched through her bag and took out a doggie wedding dress and tux, "outfits!"

I laughed when I saw the little wedding dress. "I doubt Princess will want to wear that,"

She shrugged. "He'll wear it whether he likes it or not,"

This made me laugh harder.

Mitchie dug through her gigantic purse and pulled out some cards. "I got invites. When you get off cabin arrest we'll go pass them out,"

I nodded. "Cool," Yeah, I get off cabin arrest tomorrow! Yay!

My uncle came into my cabin. "Hey, Shane," he sat down on my bed.

I turned to him. "What do you want, Brownie?"

He shrugged. "I was just wondering how the wedding planning was going. Do you have a caterer yet?"

I nodded. "Yeah. We're getting Corner Bakery – they catered the promette and the food was really good,"

"So you don't need my help with planning anything?"

I shook my head. "Brownie, I'm eighteen and I'm a big boy now; Mitchie and I can plan the wedding by ourselves,"

He shrugged. "Fine then," he left the cabin. "By the way, it's rabies shot day," he called out from outside my cabin.

I groaned. "Noooo! Brownie you get back here right now!"

Uncle Brown came into my cabin. "Yes?"

I held up my arm that was chained to my bed. "No rabies shot today. I can't go to the hospital, remember?"

He nodded. "Yeah. There's a doctor coming here,"

"You're shitting me right?"

"Um… no,"

"Nooo!" I yelled again. "But Brownie, everyone will see me cry!"

"Then don't cry,"

"I can't help it, Brownie! It hurts! Can't we just wait a day until I'm off of cabin arrest and can go to a hospital?"

He shrugged. "Too bad," he said. "Dying hurts even worse than being embarrassed and a little, ity bitty, shot," he left my cabin.

I turned to Mitchie. "Fucking Brownie…"

Mitchie shrugged. "I'll hold your hand,"

"Holding my hand won't make it stop hurting,"

"Sure it will. You just got to believe in it,"

"I might rip your arm off,"

"I'll be fine,"

"Really?"

"Really,"

"Wow. You're brave,"

X X X

Jason, Nate, and Mitchie are standing in my cabin. I'm freaking about because I'm about to get shot – who doesn't freak out? Mitchie is standing by my bed and I'm digging my nails in to her skin, making little half-moons on her arm. She trying to pull away, but I just keep giving her the look.

I close my eyes and squeal when the needle enters my skin, and I dig my nails into Mitchie's arm even further, causing her to squirm a bit. She pulls my hand off of her arm. "Wow," she breathed.

I nodded, my eyes still closed.

"I didn't know you were that afraid of shots," she said, looking at her arm.

"I told you," I said.

**A\N: I was just nominated for favoruite Author and this story was nominated for favourite Comedy!! So please please please go vote for me!! It would be such an honor to win an award!! Go to this person's profile and I think there's a link there: ScarlettBlush **

**Vote for me pleasee!!**


	46. Freedom

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 20: "Freedom**

So I'm free. I can run away if I want. I can go jump in the lake (not that I would want to.) I can go pee in a river. I can… basically I can do whatever the hell I want, you get the picture.

Mitchie came up to me. "The wedding's in three days! I'm so excited!"

I nodded. "Me too. I bet Prince and Princess are, too," I looked over at our dogs who were sleeping together on Princess's bed. I smiled.

"We got to go pass out the invites," Mitchie said taking out the invited from her purse.

"Let's pass them out at dinner," I told her, closing my laptop and putting it under my bed – that way no one touches it, because what kind of a crazy person goes under a bed?

She smiled. "Sounds perfect," she handed me half of them. "You pass the invites out to the left side of the room and I'll pass them out on the right,"

I shrugged. "Sounds like a plan! Let's bring the groom and groom, too,"

Mitchie nodded. "Well I'm gonna go take a shower and then head over to the dining hall. I guess I'll meet you guys – guys as in the dogs and you – there," She left my cabin.

I went over to the dogs and woke them up. "Hey guys. The wedding's in three days!"

Prince barked.

I laughed. "I thought you were excited. I am too," I scratched him behind his ears and he did that really cute leg thing. "Aren't you guys just so sweet, aren't you!"

Nate coughed and I turned around. "I wasn't talking to my dogs like they were babies if that's what you mean," I defended, standing up and grabbing an invite. "Here, take an invite!"

He looked at the envelope and opened it up. "Cool. I'll be there,"

I nodded. "Yeah. You kind of have no choice – Brownie's making everyone go no matter what,"

Nate shrugged. "Whatever. Jason and I will see you at dinner later then,"

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Horseback riding,"

"You horseback ride?"

He shrugged. "Sorta. I can gallop and stuff, but Mitchie's dad is gonna teach us how to jump over stuff today,"

"He knows how to ride horses?"

"He owns a ranch, you know,"

"HE DOES?!"

"Yeah… bye," Nate set off.

Wow. Mitchie's dad is a rancher? I never knew that! I'll have to ask Mitchie about it later. I love horses! Ok, maybe I don't but if Mitchie does, then I do too. I mean, what's so hard about riding horses, anyway?

X X X

At dinner, I went down the left side of the dining hall with Princess on a leash, passing out the wedding invites. Most people looked excited, but when I was about half way to the end of the row, some kid looked at the invite and then ripped it up. I gasped.

"Oh no you didn't!" I yelled.

He looked at me. "I don't want to go to some stupid dog wedding!"

I picked up my dog. "Princess wants you to come. This is his special wedding, you know!"

The guy smirked. "Princess? And he's a boy? Why the hell did you name your _boy_ dog Princess?"

I glared at him. "Princess is gay,"

He raised his eyebrows. "A gay doggie wedding? No thanks. I'm against gay marriage. It's not right and it's a sin. God will punish you. Stupid faggot dog,"

I set Princess down. "Princess, go back to Mommy; I have to settle this,"

Princess barked and then he ran over to Mitchie. I looked back at the kid. "What's your name, kid?"

"Matthew," he replied.

I grabbed Matthew by his shirt collar.

"HEY! What the fuck?!" he screamed as I dragged him away. I went to the back of the dining hall and then punched him across the face. "DUDE!" he screamed.

I punched him again. "Say sorry for calling my dog a faggot!"

Matthew shook his head. "No way!"

I kicked him in the balls. He gasped and fell to the ground. "SAY SORRY!"

"No!" he replied. I kicked him in the stomach and then pulled him up from the ground smacking him across the face.

"You're going to that wedding and you're gonna apologize to my dog!" I screamed, slapping him again.

Jason came over to me. "Who are we fighting today?"

I turned to him. "Just a homophobe," I kicked him again.

"FUCK HIM UP!" Jason cheered me on.

I hit Matthew again and his nose started bleeding. I grabbed the kid's shirt again and brought him into a random cabin, and opened the bathroom door. I pushed his head in the toilet and held him there for a second.

I pulled the homophobe back up. "Ready to apologize?"

He shook his head so I dunked his head back in the toilet. He gasped when I brought him back up to the surface.

"Yeah!" Jason cheered. "Fuck him up!"

I shoved his head in the toilet again and then flushed it. I pulled Matthew up by his hair he gasped. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Even though he apologized, I pushed him back in the toilet and then pulled him back up.

"Now say it like you mean it!" I yelled at him.

Matthew coughed out some toilet water. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for calling your dog a faggot!"

I pushed him in the toilet again and flushed it. I pulled him back up and then held his hair as I led him into the dining hall. I shoved an invitation at him and he scowled as he took it. "See you at the wedding!" I called out after him. His hair was dripping wet, and his t-shirt was wet as well.

I finished passing the rest of the invites out to the rest of the campers, and when I was sure everyone was coming, I sat down and ate dinner with Mitchie, Jason, and Nate.

Mitchie turned to me. "What was that all about?"

I shrugged. "We were just having a friendly talk; don't worry – everyone's coming to the wedding,"

**A\N: If you haven't already voted for me as favoruite author and Camp Revenge as favourite comedy, please do so now!! VOTE PEOPLE VOTE!! Go to ScarlettBlush 's profile and PM her, casting your votes!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!**


	47. Horses

Camp Revenge Season 2

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 21: "Horses"**

Mitchie turned to me. "Tomorrows the wedding! I'm so excited and I'm not even getting married!"

I laughed. "I know. I'm excited too,"

"So what do you want to do today? I mean, we're at camp and all. We could go do camp stuff," Mitchie said.

I shrugged. "Jason and Nate went horseback riding yesterday. Would that be fun?"

She nodded. "Yeah! My dad is running the horseback thing so we can go!" She grabbed my hand and ran out of my cabin with me. We walked down the dirt path to the horse place and when I got a whiff of awful-smelling shit, I knew we had arrived.

Mitchie walked in the stable. "Hi Daddy, we want to ride some horses,"

Mitchie's dad nodded. "Ok," he turned to me. "Do you ride English or Western?"

I rubbed the back of my neck. "Do I do what now?"

He laughed a bit. "Have you ever ridden a horse before?"

I shook my head. "No,"

"Well I can teach you!" Mitchie exclaimed, grabbing my hand and bringing me over to the horses. She untied one of them and put a saddle on it. "This is Hightower, he's our tallest horse,"

I waved. "Hi, Hightower,"

Mitchie laughed and pointed to the saddle. "You put your right foot here and pull yourself up,"

I did as I was told, and with the help of Mitchie, I got on the horse. Mitchie got on her own horse and brought her around to me. "Your horse will just follow me," she said and kicked her horse. Her horse went off and so did mine. I got a little freaked out and grabbed onto the reins.

Mitchie looked back at me. "Are you doing ok?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I lied. I gulped and continued walking with her.

We went into some woodsy area and my horse just kept on walking with Mitchie's. We came to a stream crossing and Mitchie's horse ran through the river. My horse stopped and put his head down, causing me to let go of the reins and it started drinking from the river.

"Damn it, Hightower!" I yelled at the horse.

Mitchie backed her horse up and went over to the stream, dismounting. Her horse shook its head and Mitchie walked into the stream. She grabbed the reins and put them back on the horse. She handed the newly-wet reins to me and I hesitantly took them. "Eww… it's wet!" I exclaimed.

She let out a huff of laughter and got back on her horse. My horse started walking when Mitchie's walked away. We continued on the trail until we got to some flat land. Mitchie turned to me. "Ready to gallop?" she asked.

I nodded. "Sure," Whatever that is…

Mitchie kicked her horse and it started running really – and I mean really – fast. My horse did the same and I got so freaked out and grabbed the saddle horn, hanging on for dear life. I screamed. Mitchie stopped her horse, but mine kept on running. "HOW DO YOU STOP THIS THING?!" I screamed, holding on.

"Watch out for the fox holes!" she screamed.

I turned my head around. Mitchie was galloping after me, her horse going twice as fast as mine. Then, I felt the horse going down, and I was thrown off the thing and landed a couple feet away on the ground. Mitchie was screaming and the horse was whinnying.

I closed my eyes and laid down on the ground. My whole body ached. I let out a faint moan.

Mitchie came running over to me. "Shane!" she screamed, bending down next to me.

I moaned again. "Horses hurt," I replied.

She grabbed me and pulled me up so I was sitting up. "What happened?" I asked.

Mitchie looked back at the horse and so did I. The horse was laying on the ground.

"What the hell?" I asked.

Mitchie went over to the horse and then turned back to me. "Your horse tripped on one of these fox holes. I think he's hurt,"

"Well shit," I cursed.

She nodded. "I'll go get my dad. You stay here, ok?"

I sighed. "Ok. Don't take long, please,"

Mitchie mounted her horse and kicked it, galloping off back to camp. I stood up and went over to the horse, gently stroking its neck. "Hi little horsey," I said.

The horse looked at me. I sat down next to it. "Don't want to talk, eh?" I asked, looking at the horse. He snorted. "Great, I'm talking to a horse…" I muttered.

Then, I saw two people riding towards me – but it wasn't Mitchie and her dad, it was Jason and Nate.

Nate dismounted his horse. "Hi Shane. What's up? Where's Mitchie? Why is your horse laying on the ground?"

I stood up and shrugged. "The horse like killed itself. Mitchie went to go get her dad,"

"Oh," Nate said looking at the horse. "Is he all right?"

I shrugged. "How should I know?"

Jason went over to us. "Hi Shane. We were just out here practicing our jumps. Want to see?"

"Sure," I said.

He smiled and set off. There was a fence near by, so Jason gained enough speed and then his horse jumped over the fence. I laughed a bit. "That's pretty cool," I said to Nate.

Nate nodded. "I can do that too. I also learned how to back up and do all this cool stuff,"

"Cool," I replied.

Jason came back over to us, stopping so that a bit of dust flew at us. "You like?"

I laughed. "Yeah. You're pretty good at that,"

He beamed. "Thanks!"

Then, we saw Mitchie and her father come galloping towards us. Mitchie's dad dismounted and ran over to the horse. Mitchie came over to us. "Hi guys," she said. "I didn't know you were riding today,"

Nate got back on his horse. "We were just practicing our jumps,"

She smiled. "That's pretty cool. Hey, you know there's a rodeo next month, maybe you could be in it,"

Nate smiled so big, I swear his face was going to snap in two. "Seriously?! That'd be so much fun!"

Mitchie nodded. "Yeah. They do all sorts of team things with ranches and everything. You could be on our ranches team,"

"REALLY?!" Nate exclaimed. "You actually mean it?! That's always been my dream to compete in a rodeo, you know?"

I turned to him. "What? You told me your dream has always been to be famous,"

He nodded. "Now that I'm famous, my other dream is to compete in a rodeo,"

Mitchie laughed. "Ok. Well the rodeo is next week. I'll ask my dad and he'll probably let you compete with us,"

"Well Hightower's leg is broken," Mitchie's dad grimly informed us and we all turned to him.

"Aww, shit," I complained.

Mitchie looked upset. "Damn it,"

Mitchie's dad stood up. "You guys wait here and I'll go get the vet," he said and hopped back on his horse. He rode off, careful to avoid the fox holes, and about thirty minutes later, he returned with another man in a truck with a trailer attached, and the man – I'm guessing the vet – started wrapping the horse's leg up with bandages.

Nate, Jason, Mitchie, and I exchanged glances and then they all hopped on their horses. I pouted when I didn't have a horse and Mitchie dismounted her horse and walked back to camp with me.

There's one thing for sure – I won't be competing in the rodeo with Nate.


	48. Weddings

**Camp Revenge Season 2**

**Chapter 22: "Stress"**

Mitchie started freaking out. "The balloons aren't here. The cake is not ready yet… The wedding's in five hours, Shane, what do we do!?"

I put my hand on her shoulder. "First thing is, calm down,"

Mitchie closed her eyes and exhaled. "Ok. Calm,"

"Everything will work out, I promise," I told her.

She nodded. "We are calm. We're fucking frogs sitting in a pond,"

"Yes," I nodded, "Fucking frogs. Now let's just go down to the lake and help set up, ok?"

Mitchie nodded again. "Yeah. The cake will be here… We can do this,"

We both walked down to the lake – where the wedding will take place – and saw all the people we hired setting up the wedding. They were putting pink tablecloths on the tables that were set up and putting the white foldy chairs under the tables. A couple people were setting up the food table, and others were putting placemats, silverware, and plates on the tables.

I grabbed some of the table decorations – a centerpiece for each table, and sparkly confetti – and started decoratively putting them on the table. I put a centerpiece – a pink wedding cake made out of cardboard and tissue paper – and some silver confetti around the tables. Mitchie did the same.

Once we finished putting the decorations on the table, the rainbow balloons arrived, and some of the helpers were creating a rainbow balloon arch around the alter. I tied balloons randomly around the wedding area, like on the food table, and then put the rest on the backs of chairs.

When everything was perfectly set up, Uncle Brown came into the wedding area. "Hey, guys,"

Mitchie looked around. "The cake – the wedding cake. Where the hell is the cake?!" she started hyperventilating. "And what about the designer dog treats? Where is everything?!" she gat down on one of the pews. "Oh this is so stressful!"

I sat down next to her. "Just calm – ok? We're calm. Everything will work out,"

Uncle Brown came over to us. "Overreacting a bit, eh?"

I glared at him. "Shut up, Brownie,"

He held up his hands defensively and walked away. Jason and Nate came over to us.

"Hi, Mitch. Hi, Shane," Nate greeted.

"NO!" Mitchie squealed jumping up. She pushed Jason and Nate away. "No one is allowed to see the wedding until the wedding!"

The two walked away, looking back once. I glared at them and they turned back around, running away.

I turned to Mitchie. "Jesus Fucking Christ, calm down, will ya?"

She shook her head. "There is so much to be done and so little time! I mean, the bridesmaids – do they have their dresses? And the best men? Do they have their tuxes?"

I stood up. "I'll go see if everyone's ready," I went into Caitlyn's cabin – she Ella, and Peggy are the bridesmaids. They were all sitting in a circle – a girly gossip group – and they looked up at me when I walked in the cabin. "Hi guys," I walked closer to them. "Mitchie's having a panic attack and she wants to know if you are ready for the wedding,"

They all nodded.

"The dresses are here. We're all good. We're just having our bridesmaid party before the wedding," Caitlyn told me.

I nodded. "Good. Just making sure," I left the cabin and went to mine – Jason, Nate, and Uncle Brownie are the best men. Jason and Nate were sitting on their air mattresses. "Mitchie's having a heart attack and wants me to ask you if you're ready for the wedding,"

Nate nodded. "Yeah. We're having our little before-wedding party. Apparently the best men do that before a wedding,"

I raised my eyebrows. "Without my uncle?"

He shrugged. "We invited him, but he said he was going to get the cake or something like that,"

I laughed. "Ok then. Just making sure you guys were ready," I left the cabin and went back to the lake. Mitchie was there yelling at some of the workers. "Whoa, whoa, easy there, sister," I said.

She turned to me. "The balloons aren't the right yellow color!"

"Shh…" I said. "Just calm down. It doesn't have to be perfect,"

Mitchie nodded. "Ok. I'll calm down. I'm sorry, it's just that I want this to be perfect and so far it's not working out so well,"

A scrawny kid wearing jeans and a t-shirt came up to us. "Hi, I'm the justice of the peace you hired,"

Mitchie looked him up and down and then shook her head. "No, no, no, no. You're wearing jeans and an ugly brown t-shirt? Where's your tux? … You're not the justice of the peace!"

I turned to Mitchie. "Yes he is,"

She shook her head. "No! This is the nephew of the justice of the peace! I want the real guy! They won't actually be married if it's not the real justice of the peace!" she broke down in tears and sat down on the ground.

I turned to the kid. "Sorry, my girl friend is going insane," I faced Mitchie. "Just calm down, ok? All will be good. Everyone's ready for the wedding and it will work out perfectly, ok?"

Mitchie slowly nodded. "Ok,"

I helped her back up to her feet. "Go take a shower and get ready. I'll be here making sure everything is ok,"

Mitchie nodded and then set off. I turned to the justice of the peace. "Sorry about that. She's so stressed out from the whole wedding thing,"

"It's ok," the kid said. "It happens a lot,"

I smiled. "Hi, I'm Shane,"

The kid held out his hand. "Dustin," he said. We shook hands.

"Well the wedding should start in like two hours. You can go wait somewhere or eat some of the food,"

Dustin nodded and headed off.

I turned around and watched as the workers set up the wedding place. It all looked very nice – the tables were all white with pink tablecloths and white chairs. The buffet table was set up with all sorts of snacks and gourmet foods.

Then, my uncle arrived with a huge-ass pink box – I'm guessing the cake. Two people came over and took the box from him, setting it on a table. When they opened the box, I caught a glimpse of the giant four-layer white cake. On the top of it were two dogs wearing wedding outfits. I laughed on the inside and walked over to it. It was sparkling due to the sugar on it, and there were rainbow roses on it.

Mitchie came over to us, wearing a fancy blue dress, and looked at the cake, smiling and gasping. "It's so beautiful!" she grabbed a camera and took a picture. She started taking pictures of the whole set up. The wedding was only an hour away and I couldn't be more excited.

I turned to Mitchie. "I have to get my tux on. You go get the bride in his dress, ok? You deal with the girl stuff like your bridesmaids and everything and I'll get the guys ready," I turned to my uncle. "You go make sure all the campers are ready – especially that Matthew guy. He gave me some shit about going to the wedding,"

We all set off, my uncle going into all the camper's cabins, Mitchie going into her cabin to get Princess in her wedding gown, and I went into my cabin, getting my tux on. When I saw Jason and Nate sitting on my bed laughing, I yelled at them to get their tuxedos on.

I looked at my watch – forty-seven minutes 'till the wedding.

I got Prince into his little doggy tux – which was hard work, mind you – and then put him on his leash.

Thirty-two minutes 'till the wedding.

I brought Prince over to Mitchie's cabin and she smiled. I went over to the lake and looked around for a bit.

Then, Mitchie came running up to me, holding up her long blue dress as she ran. She stopped by me, catching her breath.

"What?" I asked. "What's wrong?"  
"The groom," she breathed. "He ran away!"

"Which one?" I asked.

"Princess!"

Twenty-one minutes until the wedding.


End file.
